If you’re truly ready to stop, you can do it. My experience has been that sometimes even when an addict has every reason in the world that they “should” want to stop, deep down they really don’t want to stop…and so of course they don’t. But it sounds to me like you know it’s time to stop.
I think going to your doctor would be a good first step.
You can talk to your doctor about if you have done any damage to your liver and about if you need to be medically supervised while you detox (I don’t know if you have been drinking heavily enough to be physically dependent on alcohol, but if you have, then it’s best to have medical supervision - whereas opiate withdrawal is unpleasant, it isn’t dangerous…alcohol withdrawal can potentially be dangerous for people who have been drinking heavily enough every day that their body doesn’t know how to function without alcohol). I assure you that your doctor has seen this kind of thing before - alcohol abuse and addiction is a very common problem.
Additionally, you might also be able to discuss the option of medication to help you stay away from the alcohol and opiates (even if your doctor doesn’t prescribe it personally they may be able to refer you to someone who does). One option that you might want to look into is a medication called naltrexone which is available as a long-acting injection as well as a pill. Some people find that being on the injection helps them stay compliant since it’s not a matter of choosing every day to take the pill or not.
Good luck. You can do it.
You say you feel like you can’t time off. Consider how much time you are spending on your addictions right now, including the time spent hungover and agonizing about them. Any time you spend on recovering will be paid back to you and your family many times over.
It’s only going to get worse. AA is not to everone’s taste, but it’s free and everyone there has been through what you are going through.
Just dropping in to lend support hugs I’m not an alcoholic, but my dad was.
This is one of 3 books that changed my life.
Talk to your husband and get help!
Yes, this is an important point. You currently spend a lot of time thinking about and acting upon your addiction. In fact, one of the hardest things I had to face after quitting was what to do with all of my free time. Bored…drink. You know? You will have to find hobbies / activities to take up all your newly found free time.
She’s got two small children. She’s ll be busy.
For the OP, I stopped drinking nine months ago. It was really, really hard, but I was on a crash course for disaster myself.
Postponing talking to you husband won’t make the problem spontaneously go away. It’s hard, but try talking to him.
Good luck.
With a doctor’s note you will get some time off work, and still have your job. They won’t know why either “medical leave of absence” and they have no right to ask why. So don’t worry about that. Your husband may or may not be upset initially, but anyone with their head on straight will be relieved you’re confronting it.
Best of luck to you.
I don’t know you, but I’m rooting for you and your life.
Hang in there baileygrrl, you’re going to be just fine. Please don’t be afraid to tell your doctor. Alcohol abuse is probably the least exciting thing they hear about on a day to day basis.
This is actually very true. It’s absolutely exhausting hiding my addiction.
Me too.
It really is, and it caused me additional anxiety too (in the form of panic attacks).
Echoing Ibanez, yes, they can’t ask why you are on medical leave. The rumour at my work was that I had cancer. I didn’t correct anyone, but didn’t talk about it either.
So, if you don’t mind answering, why is it you drink (to excess), do you think?
It must have been very hard to write that. Now it’s time to take the next step. Tell your husband and get help. As I’ve found in my life the fear and anticipation leading up to an event is almost always worse than the actual event. Put your head down and push through it.
I can’t offer much here other than emotional support…but I’m good at that!
Good luck…it’s a long road, but there are lots of examples as near as this thread of people who have walked down it before you. Lean on your friends here at the 'Dope.
-D/a
Editing mine, because I’ll not repeat any of that crap.
cougar58, you’re not helping. Stop now.
baileygrrrl, I hope you’ll do the right thing, and I wish you strength. Be well.
You’re smart enough to see where you’re headed if you don’t make changes, that’s a huge first step. Please know that we are rooting for you, and trust your husband and doctor to do the same. Your children deserve a sober mom. Be brave and hang in there, you can do it.
As many others here have I got sober 22 years ago. When I got sober I was really more concerned about being happy and not lonely than I was drinking. I can’t tell you what a difference it has made in my life. I didn’t take any shortcuts, I wanted more than just being sober, I was after the good life they promised would follow if I took direction became brutaly honest and did the footwork. I haven’t looked back and my life has been great.
I didn’t have a drop throughout my entire pregnancy. I also quit smoking on the spot when I found out. I do have some willpower. I was also abusing codeine when I found out I was pregnant. I tapered off it. Honestly, I felt better than ever during my pregnancy. It felt GOOD to be clean.
Thank you to everyone for your words of support. It means a lot.
I didn’t drink last night at all. I did a lot of thinking about coming clean with my husband. It’s going to sound like an excuse, but I think I’m going to tell him after Christmas. I should be able to take some time off early in the new year.
I know it won’t be easy, but if you had the will power to stop when you were pregnant, you can stop now. Sure, you don’t have the same motivation since you aren’t carrying a baby, but the power to stop is within you.
I have a relative who was addicted to alcohol and prescription drugs and she could/did not stop during pregnancy. Her baby appears healthy in spite of her addiction, but it’s probably too early to tell.
My point is, you are stronger than you know. When you were pregnant, you were motivated to stop, because you didn’t want to harm your baby. WHat can you use as motivation now? What are you afraid will happen if you continue? Whatever it is, use THAT to keep you sober. You can do it.
Don’t let the holidays be an excuse to avoid telling the truth. After that, it’ll be I’ll wait till Spring, or after summer holidays, you get the idea.
You owe it to yourself and your family to be the change you want to see today. If your husband has stood by you through your marriage thus far, he’ll stand with you on this. You have taken a brave first step, now take the next one. There is absolutely no shame in asking for help, as you have already done. Best of Luck! We are all in this together in some way.