I know you have a theory. An inkling?
(And before anyone comes in here and tries to make me feel guilty, let’s just remember these girls have never been the type to take themselves too seriously.)
Okay, I’ll go first.
My first thought was, revelation of their lesbian realtionship!
Your turn…
Outscored her 2-1 on the IQ test.
That’s not a ratio. That’s their actual scores.
I think she wanted Paris to be in Cafe Society. 
I’ll send them both there for you.
Nicole has slimmed down and has been looking very ladylike and stylish lately. She’s also appears to be happliy engaged. Anything that steals Paris’ thunder is bound to piss her off.
I read that Nichole showed Paris’s sex video at a party as a joke, while Paris was present. Seemed it didn’t go over too well, if true.
My bet is that since they both have the maturity of 13 year olds… A boy.
I read in some article that Paris had friends over to watch a tape of her SNL show, and Nicole slipped in the tape of “One Night in Paris.”
I saw the headline, “paris and nicole have feud” (or whatever) and I said, “I’m not gonna click on it. I’m not gonna click on it.”
And I clicked on it. I lost IQ points just for clicking.
Showed up in public not dressing or acting like a brain damaged two dollar whore, and thus made Paris look bad by comparison.
Okay, I guess I really can’t see this one happening.
I can picture Nicole cackling “I’ll get you, my pretty, and your little dog, too.”
On second thought, excuse me. That would be Nicole Witchie.
Got her pregnet, thus spoiling all her fun.
Yeah, I know women can’t be impregnated by other women, but since Paris was bitching about how much being pregent sucks…
She didn’t return Paris’ copy of ‘Being And Nothingness’ by Jean-Paul Sartre.
Nicole overheard Paris talking to some other people at a party saying something about, “those n*****s.”
Seriously, I read this somewhere. I lost so many IQ points for reading it that I can’t remeber where.
Heh.
That’s what Howard Stern said it was. Nicole denied it.
It was Nicole that hacked Paris’ Blackberry, thus stealing control of her OMAC surveillance satellite in an attempt to take out the world’s metahumans.
Seriously, I strongly suspect Paris Hilton is Batman. I mean, no one is that dumb and spoiled. Right?
Right?
I’m totally going to start a “Paris Hilton, if she’s prepared” bandwagon now.
If they have to settle this once and for all, I suggest this:
Paris and Nicole in a mudwrestling fight. Yeah, I know Paris looks like she got hit with the '57 Ugly Buick [sup]®[/sup], but the thought of two prissy little princesses fighting it to the death in absolute pig slop makes me feel that inner Karmic warmth.
Tripler
It’ll be like a Johnny Cash song! “Kickin’ and a gougin’ in the mud, the blood, and the beer. . .”
Root beer. Up nose. Must have as sig.
I’m not sure why I started Shatnering right then…
Like, she totally ranked on Paris’ man, Paris! So not hot! Plus, like, she’s totally gone all adult and stuff, and wearing longer skirts and acting all grown up, and that’s such a drag. I mean, she’s totally not fun anymore, and so Paris has to settle for Tara Reid.
Nicole ghost-wrote the SP “Stupid Spoiled Whore” episode.
Nicole recalled ANIMAL HOUSE and deadpanned, “Fat, stupid and drunk is no way to go through life, Paris.”
To which Ms. Hilton replied, “Who are you calling FAT, bitch?”