"So we were out walking the iguana today..." and other rare sentences

[zoid]

I bust up every time I remember this:

@Hung_Mung

“You know what? Fuck it, you dimwits are on your own,” spake Jesus, and lo, Jesus did command Bartholomew to give him a piggy-back ride home.

From this thread:
https://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?p=8978466#