“Fat Free” might be a scam.
It shrinks.
That I should modify the underside of my desk to have a compartment for a blanket and pillow, and a shelf for an alarm clock.
Wearing a wedding ring makes a man more attractive to women.
Blood does not make a good coolant for your car’s radiator.
Never hire Cubans to roll your crêpes .
When in doubt, do the opposite.
Before becoming a goofy family man with a low-paying desk job, and then a serious teacher-turned-drug-lord, Walter White was a dentist in NYC.
Dominicans.
I actually have a real, non joke answer to this: the first time I ordered Chow Fun was because of George’s description of it (“it’s a broad noodle”). Turned out I loved it and it’s one of my staple dishes to order ever since.
If you’re going to cheat on your fiancee, make sure you have an airtight cover story.
Women don’t appreciate manure jokes.
Even a woman with a botched nose job can be made to look beautiful.
Never double-dip
I’m out
You can get gonorrhea from riding a tractor in a bathing suit.
George Steinbrenner and Donald Trump are basically the same guy.
Actually, Beef-A-Reeno. (Fit for King and Queen-o!)
There’s good naked and bad naked.
Hey! I’ve fished stuff out of the garbage and eaten it years before George did it!
Don’t pee in the shower at the gym.
China Panda doesn’t deliver below 86th.
There’s nothing to rent in Tuscany.
Take your pants off before you go on TV, to keep the crease. But don’t leave them on your chair.
Engaging in sexual intercourse with the cleaning woman on the desk in your office is wrong.
No matter how I might have felt about my dancing prowess, I cannot be worse than Elaine.
Kung Pao chicken. I made it after the episode and loved it ever since. I like my chicken spicy!
Also, mangoes. I love them as well after Kramer’s rant.
I think you mean “swampspruce likes his chicken spicy!”
Clowns are scary.