Songs You Could Not Have Sex to Without Cracking Up

Yesterday night I had Mudshark over, and we were trying to come up with the exact opposite of this thread: Greatest Songs to Have Sex to. (Pardon ending the sentence with a preposition, but rewording it just makes it look horrid).

Anyway, he asked me if the whole album Days of Future Passed by the Moody Blues would work, and after thinking about it, I almost burst out laughing, found the CD and put on track three. We looked at each other and cracked up. It would be impossible to have intercourse during this song. (It’s called The Morning, and you just cannot screw to it. You would feel like a pedophile. Well, I suppose you could have sex to it if you were a pedophile…but I’m digressing now).

At any rate, what other songs could you simply not have sex to without cracking up?

The Hokey Pokey?

The Streak!

Love to Love You Baby

Any Weird Al Yankovic album, or perhaps any selection from Chipmunks greatest hits.

Oh baby, I want you to…ALVIN!!! Yes, Dave?

I would probably crack up at:

‘I’m too Sexy’ by Right Said Fred


‘You light up my life’ - Debbie Boone

Let’s Talk About Sex… by Salt’N’Peppa (anyone remember this?)

The 1812 Overture - especially the part with the cannons. :slight_smile:

Probably any song on a K-Tel novelty album:

Beans in My Ears
Harry the Hairy Ape
Name Game
Bird Is the Word
Papa Oom Mow Mow
Stranded in the Jungle
The Thing
Purple People Eater

and of course,

Winchester Cathedral

Je’Ataime by Serge Gainsbrough

(I know, it’s all spelled wrong!)

I remember that salt n pepa song Samarm!!

I think I would definately crack up to the “you and me baby aint nothin but mammals” song (I don’t remember the artist in question and am too lazy to go fish the CD out of the changer.

Alvin and the Chipmunks was a great one danceswithcats… We still want a hoooooola hoooop…

I’d like to also add any Sa Yooper’s song to the list…

And any “Bear in the Big Blue House” song - it is hard to have sex when one of the songs is stuck in your head from having to hear it over and over all day. :eek:

Ugh yeah Bear… I was trying not to think about bear… Thanks sweetie… now I have a bear song stuck in my head again :frowning:

Oh and I can’t type either… it is Da Yooper’s… Guess I shouldn’t have laughed at you in the Nov 14 thread the other day!


I think that was King Missile.

“We can do it doggy-style
So we can both watch X-Files”

No, the “you and me ain’t nothin but mammals” song is not by King Missile, it’s by the Bloodhound Gang. King Missile wrote “Detachable Penis”.

Ok… I looked… it is Bad Touch by the bloodhound gang :slight_smile:

The “It’s getting hot in here” song…“It’s getting hot in here/So take off all your clothes…”

“Sex Dwarf.”

Isn’t it nice, luring disco darlings to a life of vice…

“get off” by prince

Got them mixed up. Easy enough to do.