You may go down in history as the first man to ever lead a loaded goat out of town.
I’ll be Mother of the Year.
[beep] me sideways. I have raised some thoughtful children.
We are not here, so leave your message after the beeeeeep!
I have a message and a question. The message is from the Doctor, and the question is from me.
Please state the nature of the medical - oh, it’s you.
I gave him his medical options, and he decided on what was best for him. Don’t put this on me.
Well, a lot of people don’t look at it like you were sick, Hawkeye. A lot of people look up to you here. They admire you and they kinda feel they want to be like you. And… Gee, when you walk out on an operation, they kind of feel like you’ve let them down. If they can’t depend on you, well, they figure, well, maybe there’s no point in depending on anything.
One thing I’ve learned is to never play Operation against a surgeon for money.
Congratulations, you’ve won the first game of “Research Lab.” Here’s your celebratory sno-cone.
You don’t wanna give up your research. It’s cozy, the comfort of obsession.
- It’s a family curse, this obsession with women. The men in our family are weak. Why couldn’t they all be more like Cousin Antony?
- Oh, Ma, Cousin Antony had an obsession with men in cowboy hats who hung around Times Square.
“Cousin Itt? From, eh, who’s side of the family?”
“He’s from both sides of the family. He hasn’t quite found himself.”
“Mr. Terwilliger, come quick! There’s trouble down to the cement mixer! Cousin Merle and me was playing fetch with Geech, that’s our old smellhound, and…”
“Geech gone to Heaven, Mister Terwilliger.”
“Oh, Cousin Merl, really!”
Trust me. I know cement and it’s not that hard.
Jethro, you can take that pink chicken back out to the cement pond. We’re goin’ out and shoot us a nice, big, fluffy soufflé.
I’ve heard that before, but then, the next thing you know I’m hiding in my bedroom, blaring a Richard Feynman lecture while my mom is shouting that Jesus would forgive her if she put ground glass in my dad’s meatloaf, and my dad’s on the roof skeet-shooting her Franklin Mint collectible plates.
Feynman delighted in making music. I never percuss for pleasure.
I’m just gonna go home, lie down and listen to country music. The music of pain.
It is incorrect to say that that song was wrote. It is incorrect to say that that song was written. It is VERY correct to say that that song was ROTTEN.