Mama Bear, we cannot find “cuckoo clock” in the code book.
- Yes. Now all I have to do is put this card into the ATM, punch in my secret code, 1-2-3-4- Oh, no! I was never supposed to reveal my code to anyone!
- Ooh, well, now you’re going to have to kill us.
“If I told you, I’d have to kill you.”
“Seriously?”
“Seriously.”
I AM GOING TO KILL YOU!
(Spoken by the White House chef in The Residence — a really good murder mystery series on Netflix.)
- I wanted to shoot him, Cliff.
- So did I. So did half the people in Dallas.
“So, today we found out about a school in Dallas for really smart kids.”
“When can I start?”
Actually, I had him tested as a child. Doctors said he was fine. Although I do regret not following up with that specialist in Houston.
It was easy. I took the whole test with just half my brain.
[snidely ] I hope it wasn’t the dumb half.
Homer’s brain: Don’t tell him you were at a bar. —But what else is open at night?
Homer: It’s a pornography store. I was buying pornography.
Homer’s brain: Heh heh heh. I woulda never thought of that.
I sit here in a bar, night after night, guzzling beer.
Ah, memory impairment. The free prize at the bottom of every vodka bottle.
I’m doing a little experiment tonight to see what will get me drunker. Drinking wine…
Could you keep it down? I’m trying to drink.
I don’t have the authority to physically stand in your way. You have a free will and a mind of your own. But I will try to change your mind.
I want the implants. Look, I’m constantly mistaken for a fifth grader, and I’m tired of it. This is my choice. And it’s taken me a long time to convince my mom, but she’s finally supporting me. I shouldn’t have to convince you, too.
You will not fail to show up. You will not even be late. Or you’ll finish out your education at a military school of my choice. Got it?
[bragging about his Military School ] We even have two guys from the regular Army to teach us the drillin’. And you know somethin’ else? All our teachers are men. Well, except the nurse.
George: You know, people think I’m smart, but I’m not smart.
Jerry: Who thinks you’re smart?
- Why are you crying?
- Because I’m stupid!
- That’s no reason to cry. One cries because one is sad. For example, I cry because others are stupid, and that makes me sad.
It’s all right to cry.
Crying gets the sad out of you.
It’s all right to cry.
It’s might make you feel better.