For as long as anyone could remember, this Indian chief was in charge of naming all the children that were born in the tribe. One day, this brave comes up to him and says, “Chief, can I ask you something? How do you name these children? How do you think of their names?” And the chief says, “It’s very simple. When a child is born, and I see snow gently falling, I say, ‘You shall be called Snow Gently Falling.’ And when a child is born and I see a hawk flying over, I say, ‘You shall be called Hawk Flying Over.’ But tell me, Two Dogs Fucking, why are you so interested?”
Justice is what I seek, Kemosabe.
They’re looking in the wrong place!
You’re a Jew? Really? I didn’t know that. So, how come you ain’t smart?
Can the Jew get down to business?
Come here, wait! I don’t want to hurt you! I just want to make you kosher!
Say goodbye to your friend, the Pig.
You’re a pig! Pig equals slop.
Stop pretending. If you look like this, then you’re fat. In fact, you’re a fat slob. Admit it. Do something about it. Want to stop sweating on relatively cool days? Call Vitaflex toll-free. If you call now, we’ll send you a free plant. A free plant for fat slobs!
That’ll do, pig.
Hey, I know how you feel; I was beat in tic-tac-toe by a chicken.
Runt, should Chicken Little have a good talk with his dad and clear the air, or keep searching for Band-Aid solutions and never deal with the problem?
I’m sorry, but somebody had to go all Joan Crawford on his ass!
No… wire… hangers. What’s wire hangers doing in this closet when I told you: no wire hangers EVER? I work and work 'till I’m half-dead, and I hear people saying, “She’s getting old.” And what do I get? A daughter… who cares as much about the beautiful dresses I give her… as she cares about me. What’s wire hangers doing in this closet? Answer me. I buy you beautiful dresses, and you treat them like they were some dishrag. You do. Three hundred dollar dress on a wire hanger. We’ll see how many you’ve got if they’re hidden somewhere. We’ll see… we’ll see. Get out of that bed. All of this is coming out. Out. Out. Out. Out. Out. Out. You’ve got any more? We’re gonna see how many wire hangers you’ve got in your closet. Wire hangers, why? Why? Christina, get out of that bed. Get out of that bed. You live in the most beautiful house in Brentwood and you don’t care if your clothes are stretched out from wire hangers. And your room looks like some two-dollar-a-week furnished room in some two-bit back street town in Okalahoma. Get up. Get up. Clean up this mess.
…where the wind comes sweeping down the plain.
Auntie Em! Uncle Henry! Toto! It’s a twister, it’s a twister!
No, that was a good size twister. What was it, an F3?
We can’t just wait here for sharks to rain down on us.
One day it started raining, and it didn’t quit for four months. We been through every kind of rain there is: little bitty stingin’ rain, and big ol’ fat rain, rain that flew in sideways, and sometimes rain even seemed to come straight up from underneath. Shoot…it even rained at night.
A great flood is coming. The waters of the heavens will meet the waters of earth. We build a vessel to survive the storm. We build an ark.