I ain’t dirty! I washed my face and hands before I come, I did.
You think just because you made a little money you can get a new hairdo and some expensive clothes and turn yourself into a lady. But you can’t, because you’ll never be anything but a common frump whose father lived over a grocery store and whose mother took in washing.
When I was a little girl, my mama used to lock me in the attic when I was bad, which was pretty often. And I would- I would pretend I was a princess… trapped in a tower by a wicked queen. And then suddenly this knight… on a white horse with these colors flying would come charging up and draw his sword. And I would wave. And he would climb up the tower and rescue me. But never in all the time… that I had this dream did the knight say to me, “Come on, baby, I’ll put you up in a great condo.”
“To whoever finds this note:
I have been imprisoned by my father…
who wishes me to marry
against my will.
Please, please,
please come and rescue me.
I am in the tall tower
of Swamp Castle.”
Papa, please. I’m not a bad girl, I swear I’m not, only I love him, I love him. He’s a good man, it can’t be wrong to love him. I want love, I can’t live without love. Oh Papa, remember how you loved Mama and how she loved you!
Most of all, I remember Mama!
A boy’s best friend is his mother.
Owen loves his Momma!
It doesn’t matter if kids love you or not. It’s not their job to love you. It’s your job to love them.
I love you all, my sons.
…but not as much as I love Sophia Loren.
I wish I had a guardian angel to tell me what to do. You know, like Debbie Reynolds had in “Tammy.” What do you think?
I need my life back! I wished away my friends, my sweet 16 party, my senior prom.
All right, you b-aaaaaaad boy, but no more freebies.
Freebie, aagh! (Screams)
You lose all of your money, honey? Do you wanna make some more? It won’t take you any longer than 15 minutes. Sooner or later you’re gonna have to sell it.
I’d buy THAT for a dollar!
Hey, mister, give me a dollar. Mister, come on, one dollar! What are you, deaf? Don’t speak English?
You talkin’ to me? You talkin’ to me?
Jesus, I open my mouth, the whole world turns smart.