Springing the new Sequential Thread

What kind of contact lenses should I get?
Glaucoma

What is that, a contact lens for people who want to experience what bad eyesight is like?

**I’m pretty sure no one else does this kind of thing

I’m up for reviving thou

Ridiculously elaborate job titles**

Thou director of Sales

**Would you have a problem with this statement?

I’ve created a red fleece monster!

**

Elmo?

I need a simple glyph to bind evil
Electronics wizards: usb wifi adapters

No, no. Any competent electronics wizard will tell you that you don’t want a binding glyph on your wifi adapter; you want a warding glyph. Using a binding glyph will just let the evil accumulate until you need to have the adapter exorcised, and that’s expensive.

Poll: Should your highest-ranking elected leader be “brilliant?”
Critical thinking under time pressure?
Biggest Lies

All that and a really good haircut, that’s what I want in our next President.

**Is this offensive, or am I too sensitive?
Women (well, hell, men too) do you ever cry when you can’t help it?
**

**Simple, Free/Cheap, Non-Tech Pleasures
Poll: Toilet lid: up or down?
**
Protip: most people get a lot more pleasure out of a BM when the toilet lid is up. Most.

ETA: now I’m repeating that line in the plaintive horror of Newt.

** Can speakers of rare languages commit crimes with impunity?
Withdrawing Money From My Roth IRA**

Sorry sir, he said “Дай ми парите” so we let him cash in your IRA.

Instead of studying, I made really lame “yo momma” jokes
Mom, The Whole “Reusing” Thing Is Going Too Far

HAHAHAHAHA…wait, I don’t get it.

So what IF I am a communist?
My Fiancee is keeping her Surname…

Well, not many women want to be called Jane Deathtothecapitalistpigs.
**Troll Dad
Cruises **

“Hey there. Wanna come under my bridge for a threesome?”

**Can someone explain Furry Fandom to me?

Etiquette question - declining a hen’s night party
**

“I’m sorry – I’m just not into Furry Fandom.”

**So what IF I am a communist?

Drop bears**

Are we letting drop bears loose on communists now?

**how to clean hardwood floors

How to stop drinking ?

how to deal with depression ?

**
The Straight Dope “How To” book.
Chapter 1 – Don’t let your dirty hardwood floors get you down.

**I’m pretty sure no one else does this kind of thing

Drop Bears**

Yes, I’m pretty sure most people do not drop bears.

**Neapolitan ice cream: what do you eat?
Brains
**
I didn’t realize that thread was so old, and enough with the zombie jokes already!

**Drop Bears
How can I break this stupid habit?
**
But I can’t just drop bears, they’re so attractive!

**“Imported from Britain” means what?
Animals Engaging in Anal Sex
**
Only if they’re imported on Royal Navy ships, amirite?

**autoerotic asphyxiation
Hip Hip Hurrah
**

And aren’t hedgehogs.

Meanwhile, in “New Posts”:

2-second question about…
autoerotic asphyxiation

Need answer fast? :dubious:

So what IF I am a communist?
What are your most silly and pointless small pleasures?

Shouting “The dictatorship of the proletariat is inevitable!” at Mitt Romney rallies.

Can’t swing a dead cat without hitting a super hero.
If you were going to a super-hero costume party