If these are illegal drugs, then, yes, do report her to the police. (They will not tell her you were the informant if you ask them.)
Be prepared for them to search everything, including your stuff, when they raid the apartment. And possibly damage things. Maybe move some stuff elsewhere beforehand. But this might convince here that you weren’t the informant.
Also, they may seal the apartment for several days after the raid, so you might have to stay elsewhere. Be prepared.
What does the lease say re: justification for eviction? Anything in there that you can point out to your landlord? Then it’s not just you asking the landlord “please help me” and hoping that he’ll put himself at risk of legal reprisal from a litigious lunatic, it’s you saying “she’s violating the terms of the lease and you have the legal authority to evict her.”
Also, IF she ever does become physically violent - and after you’ve gotten yourself somewhere safe and called 911 - and the landlord still refuses to evict her, I expect you could get a restraining order that effectively keeps her out of the place.
No…You don’t need to contact her. You need to protect yourself.
The best way to protect yourself is not to be anywhere near her. She’s crazy, and potentially dangerous. Keep your distance.
As mentioned above: barricade yourself in your room to sleep, and stay away from home for the other 16 hours of the day…
Use a public laundramat, eat in restaurants…and stay away from trouble.
It’s only for a few weeks.
And I like the suggestions of using a video recorder inside your room. If you need to speak to her, do it from inside your room, and let her know that it’s recording.
Even if the landlord decides to evict her, that takes time. I don’t know what the laws are like there but you can’t just say “leave NOW” - at least SOME notice must be given and it may well be 30 days or more which kind of makes it a useless effort.
I’ve had bad roommate situations, and I really empathize. At the same time, your posts are frustrating, because you clearly believe that there is a solution that involves your not having to move. This is probably one of those things that you’ll have to learn by experience, but I’m sorry for the unpleasantness you’re going to go through.
There is nothing he can do in California to get her out within six weeks if she chooses not to go. She is a human being and I’m sure her mother loves her, but personally I think you’d be smarter to treat her as black mold. The apartment is compromised, and although hazmat teams can cleanse it, your health is also getting worse every minute you stay.
If she is drinking and on drugs you could call the police and report her for DUI every time she leaves the house (assuming she’s driving, which I know in SFO may be less likely than other places). If she is indeed driving impaired you might even call the local PD department ahead of time and explain that shes does this all the time and you’re worried she might hurt or kill someone. Give them her license plate and car info and tell them you’ll call them every time she leaves and you believe her to be impaired.
Get evidence of her drug use and get her arrested. If she gets violent, get violent right back and claim self-defense. Nobody will believe a drug-addled psycho
I’ve dealt with similar levels of crazy my whole life. Well, my father was far more violent but really crazy.
As others have said, avoiding her is best. However, if you must be in a common area refuse to engage her and tell her to email you. Wear a headset and play music. No matter what she says, tell her “email.”
I like a few of these options, although staying out of the house every waking minute seems extreme - just spend more time outside. Same goes for completely ignoring her - just never initiate conversations unless absolutely necessary and try to keep all answers to her monosyllabic.
I’m questioning the experience some contributors to this thread have in living with other human beings outside their immediate family. I mean, shut yourself in your room until she leaves? Wear a GoPro? Fight her? This is not sensible, realistic adult advice, it’s adolescent fantasy.
Nuh-uh, I’m rejecting the idea that there is any “O U SHOULD TOTES DO THIS” advice that will magically solve this situation. I’ve had a bunch of flatmates over the years, from the crazy French guy who did naked press-ups in the living room to the woman with BPD who would bring puking drunk couples home, and unless the lease is in your name and you have veto power, you’re left with the same options as you are with dealing with any other human who gets on your nerves: you can put up with the situation, you can attempt to change it, or you can leave. All the rest of it, this STRAP ON A GO-PRO AND LOCK YOURSELF IN THE CLOSET stuff? It’s bullshit internet posturing. This? This isn’t advice, it’s a TV script.
It’s certainly only likely to escalate her behavior and antagonize her.
It sounds like the OP is not interested in leaving, whereas my first point of business would be to GTFO. But that’s based on my experience with violent, unpredictable, mentally ill family members. I don’t know if a stranger who breaks a plate in a fit of rage is capable of doing me physical harm, but I sure as hell am not going to stick around and find out. I don’t do violent, immature tirades, period. This is one of the few areas in which I’m not willing to give people the benefit of a doubt. If you behave like this in front of me, I promise you, you will never see my face again.
But in all fairness… she’s looking at only 6 weeks of hardship with someone she barely knows, that’s qualitatively different than being a kid trapped in an abusive home situation or even an adult bound by family ties to deal with certain kinds of drama indefinitely. (And in my mind makes it all the more easy to GTFO, but you know, choice is hers.)
So, OP, given that you have eliminated leaving as an option, consider that these sort of people crave drama. My advice is not to give her any. No need to do anything theatric, just avoid her when you can and keep your cool when she flips her shit. The best response to her tirades is nothing. Zero input. She’ll probably wear herself out screaming eventually. Don’t try to reason with her, don’t make excuses, don’t argue, just… disengage. Otherwise live your life normally. Finite.
Then why are you asking us? You obviously want to record her and are dismissing all suggestions to the contrary. Are you just looking for permission? Fine. I, The Great Fenris, with no legal or moral authority whatsoever now grant you permission* to record her. POOF You may proceed with your wacky scheme to look like a crazy stalker.
*The law may disagree with me, but you’ve handwaved that away as a consideration, so I’m not taking that into account.
I think headphones when outside of your room (whether listening to music or not – she doesn’t have to know), do not engage her in her tirades, and if she keeps insisting on talking then tell her to email you, is the best and most practical advice.