Raise your hand to be called on. Better still, raise them both.
Ted Cruz at CPAC, in a bizarre attempt to convince the audience that he is a real person who enjoys television and other hoo-man diversions;
This statement is so mind-bogglingly dumb that it’s wrong for two separate reasons.
First off, credit where credit’s due; Lisa is obviously a Democrat, as she’s the smartest and most rational member of the family, and genuinely cares about the rights and lives of others. (Also, in one of the future episodes, she grows up and gets elected president after President Trump drives up the deficit and ruins the economy.) 
The rest of the family clearly aren’t Republicans, though, seeing as;
- Marge voted for Jimmy Carter (twice!)
- Homer voted for Obama in 2008
- Homer and George H.W. Bush are mortal enemies
- Homer once punched George W. Bush in the gut in the Oval Office
- Homer was the spokesman of a movement to decriminalize marijuana
- Homer and Marge both voted against deporting undocumented immigrants
- Bart helped bring down Springfield’s only Republican mayor for corruption
- Bart planted subliminAL messaGOREs on the chalkboard the week before Election Day 2000
- Maggie is a baby and does not have political opinions
On the other hand, however, the other Simpsons could be seen as being representatives the Republican party;
- Homer is an uneducated alcoholic who neglects his wife, abuses his children, a tax cheat, is grossly irresponsible with guns, sold an endangered elephant to an ivory dealer, and once helped Ted Nugent run for president
- Marge believes it’s her duty as a woman to cook and clean for her husband
- Bart is a lifetime member of the NRA, a sociopath who commits violent crimes for fun, and is friends with Satan
- Maggie shot a guy with a gun that wasn’t being stored properly
No matter how you slice it, it’s impossible to parse Lyin’ Ted’s words in a way that makes the GOP look good.
He just means that Republicans cannot appreciate music. Especially sax.
And it always has to be a different one. No same sax for the GOP.
If you follow their plan out through the endgame (something the Right doesn’t seem very good at), you’d have to call ANY marriage not carried out specifically by a clergyman a “parody marriage.” That’s apt to make some people mad, isn’t it?
,considering South Carolina: make that ANY marriage not carried out specifically by a Southern Baptist minister. Or a snake handler.
And for those who through some miracle still have irony meters that haven’t exploded, She later quoted as saying “I am fed up with the media and liberals attempting to politicize tragedies”
She probably means that once Fox picks up the story they will have a D by their name.
Hey, speaking of South Carolina, check out what SC Superintendent of Education Molly Spearman said recently on her Facebook page:
:rolleyes:
Yeah, if there’s anything we can all agree on, it’s that religions don’t beget violence, right? :dubious:
And no person who is religious has ever carried out a violent act, right? :dubious:
I have it on good authority that Homer voted for Kodos.
I don’t know where to ask this question, so I’ll just ask it here:
Why would the NRA object to raising the legal age to buy assault weapons to 21?
Surely the under-21 market isn’t that huge that it would make that much difference in profit. Or is it a case of the camel’s nose under the tent, i.e., we can’t allow ANY (more) regulation, because that opens the door to all (—> total) regulation?
I think it’s most likely because the NRA is a soulless terrorist organization.
The NRA believes that any attempt to limit gun ownership is the beginning of the slippery slope towards confiscation.
In other Stupid Republican News, Paul Ryan is replacing the guy responsible for making sure elections are secure because, well, who knows why?
https://www.reuters.com/article/us-usa-cyber-election-masterson-exclusiv/exclusive-u-s-official-focused-on-election-security-will-be-replaced-idUSKCN1G62NI
Kinda what I thought.
Missouri GOP blames George Soros for the governor’s indictment.
A good number of Republican Missouri congressmen want Greitens to step aside and face the law. This guy for instance:
I object. Maggie has actually shot several people, and except for that one arguable case with Mr. Burns, her actions were responsible and in keeping with good defensive gun use. Frankly, of the entire family, she’s clearly the one best suited to responsibly keep and store firearms.
He’s just special, bless his heart.
Harden the schools with what exactly? More Broward County deputies who failed to do their job? … and NO it was not just that one deputy, there were several deputies. There is fixing to be a squabble between the Sheriff Dept and the Police Dept, over the deputies failures.
Unless it’s in a public bathroom, or with a congressional page???