Oh, and by the way, no one under 18 admitted. But maybe that’s obvious.
The chores idea, if nothing else, should cause them to find ways to amuse themselves. If this doesn’t work lock them in your ex’s room. She invited them, but it seems you are the one doing the watching. Tell her, in no uncertain terms…
these are not your relatives
they were sent by her family
she is responsible for them.
If she can’t handle them she should send them home.
Good god. I feel for you, man.
Well, since they are in your abode, and have no parental supervision, I think you’re prefectly within your rights to start laying down the law and making them obey some rules. Rules YOU set. They can be strict–like toys thrown over the wall are fucking GONE. You didn’t make this rule up, Isaac Newton did and it’s called gravity. Time the kid learned it.
You can be the Tough Uncle. Sounds like these kids NEED some limits and someone to get them in line.
At first, they will protest. It’s token resistance. They’ll act like they think you’re mean, but they’ll respect you for it and appreciate you, as long as you are fair.
Get your Ex to look into some activities for them. Swimming. Vacation Bible School. Day camp. Art classes. Get them out of the house, doing something, on a schedule.
Also, give them chores. They’re in your house for 8 weeks, they’re not guests, they are roommmates and need their share of stuff to do.
Kids thrive under rules and some responsibility. Don’t be afraid to lay down the law.
I did like the check-the-tags-and-mail-them-back idea, though. It’s a super fallback.
I hate kids. Treat your ex to a weeklong vactation then call the police saying that these kids were abandoned by their parents. Send them to foster care and never speak of them again. You will probably get the ex to leave that way too. Also, when the kids are getting ready to leave tell them that they are bad, nasty, evil kids and wouldn’t have to go away if anyone loved them. I really hate kids, especially the bad ones.
HUGS!
Sqrl
Ummm, we haven’t heard from B_Line in some time . . . You don’t think the kids have tied him up and set him on fire or anything, do you?
He didn’t call the orphanage fast enough.
Alas poor B_Line we knew him well.
We’ll always think of you when we hear other devil children stories.
HUGS!
Sqrl
I’m sure that’s not it. He’s probably in either a nice prison awaiting trial for the murder of those little monsters, or taking a nice “rest” in a private sanitarium.
- Buy a big pot. (a damned big pot)
- Put it somewhere easily noticable.
- Don’t say a thing about it. Just put it somewhere where it will be noticed.
- When someone asks what the pot is for, just say “It’s for making soup”
- Children always ask ‘why?’
- When they do, mumble something about how you need a really big pot now, because you have children in the house, and you never had a child sized pot before.
- Smile insanely.
- Repeat as needed.
I had friends who had a landlord with -evil- children. I hated 'em. These kids were well known by the local police, would sniff acetone, and would sneak back home at 3 or 4 in the morning. Oh, and the landlord was a bastard too. I wanted to get rid of one, and knew that telling the kid to beat it would not work. I casually asked him how wide he thought the grill was. He looked at me blankly (probably due to the acetone sniffing) I said “whaddya think? about 2 1/2 feet or so?” he nodded. I asked him how tall he was, he said “five feet and one inch”. I said to myself " five feet about, two and a half feet… Yeah, that ought to work!" He left me to grill my steak in peace. Never saw him again… His father defaulted on the mortgage on the place and never was seen again either. Just coincidence though.