The Alphabetical Insult Game

Thread Games
1

In the original Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles movie, while fixing up the truck, Donatello and Casey Jones have a conversation in which they exchange third-grade, PG-rated insults alphabetically.

“Here goes, gak face!”

“I’m ready, hose brain!”

So I thought we might do that here in this thread. No profanity allowed, and the cheesier, the better. The insult must be part of a sentence; you can’t just begin and end with it. And the insult is directed at the next person to post.

So can it, alligator lips!

2

I can smell you over my shoulder, butt breath, so back off.

3

Put it where the sun don’t shine, you hackneyed fartblossom!

4

[Gack! I missed out on the alphabetical thing… cancel the last.]

Put it where the sun don’t shine, chicken spit!

5

You’re so dense they should name a kilogram cake after you. It’s 2.54 times denser than pound cake…

6

You effete impudent snob.

That’s right. I went Full Agnew.

7

I fart in your general direction, you foul-smelling feline fluffer!

8

You guttersnipe.

9

You, sirrah, are a havering, hebetudinous humgruffin.

10

Get to steppin, you ignorant iguana!

11

You jiggling-jowled Jabberwocky, just wait 'til I get my hands on you!

12

Kiss off, kid.

13

Oh, go lick a lascivious lemur’s liver, you Lilliputian-looking leper.

14

Moderating

Multiple WARNINGS for personal insults.

That’s a ban for you, and a ban for you, and a ban for you…

15

Fah! Go maunder your mendacities, you morological mammothept!

16

Nertz!

17

At least I’m not an obstreperous octopode, unlike some people I could name!

18

Pipe down you pustulent prevaricator.

19

Quiet, quavering quisling!

20

Enough of your rannygazoo, you rhypophagous rhetoricaster!