The Definitive "DOES SIZE MATTER" thread and everything related.

In My Humble Opinion
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There is no contest. The anus can stretch as much as the vagina. I’ve seen pictorial proof. The sub-genre of porn devoted to stretching and large insertions, the largest objects tend to go in the anus. I’ll put the list in a spoiler to avoid squicking people:

A woman nicknamed BJ has a web site. From it:

*I got to a 14" buttplug. I can take it almost 100% to the base anally and vaginally. When I started doing the live shows in April 99 on my webcam, I used more and more large objects…these included …3 litre bottle to the label, 16 inches…2 huge dildos sent to me from Mr S Leather both 16 inches around (Mr S Leather thought they were just novelty dildos - I guess I showed him :wink: I can do them to the base
of the head…they weren’t able to stand the use I put them through…upside down bowling pin to the fattest width was given to me from another website owner. *

Don’t say I didn’t warn you.

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And a rockin’ body! Well done, Stoid!

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I have never cared about size in my partners so far, but they’ve all been pretty much on the bell curve. The guys I’ve been with have ranged from about 4.5 inches to 7.5 inches. I would say any smaller than 4.5, I’d still be willing to work with. But he’d have to be open-minded and not offended regarding use of tongue and digits and toys to make up for being physiologically unable to provide that sensation of fullness. Maybe one of those extender dingalings he can put on his dong to make it longer or wider.

So yes, size matters in that if he’s a smaller size, he has to be more open-minded and adventurous to keep his woman happy than someone with an 8 inch dong. Such are the inequities of biology. But dong size alone doesn’t make him undateable… although intense insecurity as a result of it probably would.

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Nope, it doesn’t. Yet, as I said, the sex was amazing overall. I have never been as turned on in my entire life.

Very kind of you, thanks. (Especially you, Hazle! I always think of that clip as the Ass That Wouldn’t Die.)

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And with a big penis, you can! :o (Appropriate place for blowjob smiley. :smiley: )

Actually, the vagina is the part that stretches open.

How much have you looked?

I wouldn’t say completely, but the face is a strong element of the criteria for “pretty”, vs other terms evaluating aesthetics.

Yeah, she wasn’t ugly, just a bit large. Certainly not grotesque and well within many men’s taste range. Mr. Clinton being the most notorious.

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Since this is the definitive thread, let me add a question: Ladies, have you ever lied to a man about his size? Ever say he was the biggest you had ever experienced?

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Well, both the labia and the entrance to the vagina have to stretch open. From what I understand, the vagina lengthens and increases in diameter due to sexual excitation even without anything in it. Stimulate the clitoris and labia and the vagina will open up.

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This seems unusually specific. Either you have a gift for “eyeballing,” or there was some kind of measuring instrument used?

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I never measured them, myself. It was a combination of eyeballing, and the fact that the guys I’ve been with have self-reported their own measurements during idle conversation. They seemed to jive with observation and my own, uh, handiwork. It also doesn’t hurt that the distance from my thumbtip to a line on my knuckle is one inch on the nose.

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Straight men seem far more interested in penis size than gay men or women are. If you were to graph average erect penis size there would be a huge bell curve. More than 90% of men have penises that are bout 5-7 inches long (it’s actually more like 4.8-6.8, but those numbers are a bit more clumsy to say). As others have pointed out, penis size is not very high on the list of what women are looking for in a man. As far as pleasing a woman sexually, if you think all you need is to insert something of appropriate size, you’re doing it wrong. The numbers vary a bit depending on the study, but the averages consistently hover around the following numbers. 60-70% of women require direct clitoral stimulation in order to climax. 20-30% can orgasm only from penetration. Around 5% or women are capable of achieving orgasm without direct vaginal stimulation. And those numbers are from women who report that they have had an orgasm. About 10% of women report that they have never had an orgasm.

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I think what this boils down to is that:
[ol]
[li]If your only tool for pleasuring a woman is your penis, your technique will seem inferior to smaller men who use their mouth, hands, eyelashes, feet and, most importantly, brain to pleasure their lover.[/li]
[li]There are women who will prefer your size to bigger men. Likewise there are men who prefer itty bitty titties, women who are larger than average or smaller than average, women with faults that, for you, are a complete dealbreaker, etc.[/li]
[li]Hi Opal![/li]
[li]The body types portrayed in popular media are only required to get your attention long enough to listen to the pitch. There are loads of people we wouldn’t mind gazing at in rapture that we could not or would not actually want to spend more than a few minutes with in reality.[/li]
[li]IMO it’s easier to get along with someone who’s fun to be with even when you’re not looking at them than it is to get along with someone who fits your physical ideal who is otherwise unappealing in every other respect…[/li][/ol]

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Starting off with some video inspiration:

Howard Stern Smallest Penis Contest: - YouTube
The Invention of lying: date scene - YouTube

I’ve posted this topic on other forums as well so I’ll just address and quote all of them at once. I’ve been reading the feedback throughout this week and saving up my responses so here’s my long post. I am gathering info for a loosely related project of mine so I have a bunch of notes already written down in regards to the topic.

First of all, yes, this also takes penis width into consideration. This topic explores all feelings of sexual inadequacy.

Something I just noticed is there’s way too many comments about the issue of whether or not a penis is way too big. My question is, how many of you who say size is not an issue, are just referring to people who have medium sized dicks? The original intent of the issue in question is not people who have regular dicks (5-6in) wishing their dicks were even bigger (7-9). Although we are covering all matters of sexual inadequacy, I think the more significant issue is towards the 4 inches or smaller crowd with relatively small girths. Also, I think having a micropenis puts you into another category since I think if you actually have a 2 inch or smaller erect penis this garners you some of the similar sympathy as people who are handicapped, etc. It’s the same with girls, the b-cups and c-cups wishing they were bigger; this is more about the flat chested a- Cups. Again, not saying that size inadequacy isn’t relative; there’s always exceptions as many of you have pointed out. Of course theres a c-cup person out there wishing they were even bigger. I’m just saying that there’s a lot more A-cup girls out there wishing they were bigger rather than c-cups girls wishing they were bigger. Simply pointing out
yourself or someone else as an exception doesn’t negate the issue at large.

Yes, it is worse for girls than guys because at least our packages are concealed and you won’t know what your getting until you go and find out whereas girls are judged at first glance.

Another thing that hasn’t been brought up so much is race and interracial dating?
You might say, well the issue is a niche one then. Most people have average size dicks anyways so maybe that’s why its not such a big issue. What about asian men? I’ve heard many girls bring up how they are turned off by asians because of the small penis stereotype. I’m suprised no one even brought this up. A quick search online and you’ll see many studies pointing out that penis size ranking from biggest to smallest goes in order of: African Americans, Caucasians, to Asians. The results are pretty consistent. And vice versa, since the issue of penises being way too large is brought up, are girls intimidated to date black men because they’re afraid their penises might be too large?

And what about porn. I think there’s an interesting heirachy going on in porn in what’s considered sexy. There’s actually quite a lot of girls with small tits and even fat chicks. Obviously lots of black men with big dicks so the issue of being way to large is not there. However there’s no asian men with the exception of Japanese porn? Are Asian men moved out of the picture of sexuality in western culture? Does media representation of sexuality of asian men only exist within the context of their own cultures. Why aren’t there more asian men in porn? Again, when considering this one, think not of just a few exceptions (yes you will find that there are porn videos with asian men that aren’t part of japanese porn) but of the larger picture (there’s really only a few of those). Take into consideration a larger world which is becoming more of a melting pot.

The key is to consider beyond just examples of exceptions or even of your personal opinion. Think of this issue in terms of the bigger context of culture, or ‘what might the majority of people think’. Ya, okay, maybe someone out there might actually rate a 1 as a 10, but what’s in question is what most people would think. Because let’s face it, the
likihood of you finding the right other is not that good. Even people that are married, there’s a good chance someone else out there is even better suited to you than your partner. So you people who are saying, “well there’s always someone out there”, well
maybe… but the likihood of you stumbling across this other is not good especially if you are looking for someone who is into ugly people with small tits and penises. I think this issue is especially interesting in the context of today.

And what about gay men then. So what makes gay men more concerned about length vs straight women?

What about flaccid size? Do girls care if the penis shrinks next to nothing while flaccid?

And to address some specific responses…

“So the answer to the bolded bit in your post is no The fact of the matter is that even if we were all very similar in our appearances there would still be ass holes and cunts out there that will find some ground to discriminate in an effort to
make themselves feel better.”

So take this hypothetical scenario. And I’m not saying I know the answer to this. You took a bunch of 10’s who were of the same race and stranded them on an island. You take another group of people who are a carefully selected diverse mixture of 10’s, 1’s. They get put onto another island. The 10’s would be like hot models and the 1’s are a mixture of fat, short, ugly people. No one has anything too extreme in terms of mental disability or deformity. Say these groups were stuck on their islands for a good century or so. Would the island with all the 10’s really have just as much issues with discrimination as the other island?

Another hypothetical thought experiment I though of is: What if people never aged. What if people just grew up to their physical appearance of age 25 and just stayed there. And also, there’s no disease so people that are older are just as healthy and fit
and their voices don’t get all messed ragged. You just die all of a sudden around 70-90 of unexplainable cause. How would that change the dating world. Would there be more people dating way out of their age ranges. Consider the implications.
"I just can’t imagine a woman falling in love with a man, getting intimate and then saying, “Stop! Your penis is smaller than average. All your wonderful qualities don’t count anymore. Please get dressed and go home.”

She might think however, that she’s still young and she can probably have a good chance of finding someone with great qualities AND a bigger penis. I think its good that you bring this up, because part of the interesting thing about discrimination isn’t so much that the person discriminatin has bad intentions, but rather that they just think they can do better. It’s not always such a moral issue. I know that what you’re sayin is an exaggeration, but no, manifestations of discrimination are much more passive rather than blunt.

“Also, some of the most unattractive people in the world, physically, mentally, emotionally, financially, etc., ARE paired up, living proof everywhere that even the ones and twos get to play. Also, I feel like most of the ones and twos have things that are under their control to change, if they wanted more partners to choose from badly enough. JMHO”

Yes this is obvious but the point im tryin to make is that the 2’s only to play with each other. Would you say that if black people can get along with each other, than that’s enough? Now I don’t think that’s what you actually intend to imply, but you can see the mistake in your logic. I wouldn’t say MOST of the 1’s an 2’s can change. There’s probably MANY people that lower their ratings but i think there’s a signnicant number of 1’s an 2’s out there who will always remain 1’s an 2’s.

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  1. Penis size and race. This is going to vary a bit based on the study, but in the United States, blacks average 5.8 inches, whites average 5.6 inches, and Asians average 5.4 inches. Which means that the race with stereotypical large penises out measures the race with the stereotypically small penises by less than half of an inch. So while people may let their preconceived notions affect their judgment and decisions, the actual difference between the penis sizes of different races is negligible.

  2. Which brings us to porn and race in porn. First of all, watching porn to learn something about sex is like watching Rambo II to learn about the Vietnam War. Porn is, for lack of a better term, really fucking weird. Porn caters to the tastes of 100s of millions of different people, and as such there is a lot of variety to it. It’s also important to remember that people might enjoy watching porn that depicts a sex act that they would not actually want to participate in in real life. Black men are often fetishized in porn. There are probably several different reasons for this, but one of the most prominent, and ugly reasons is as follows. Sex between a black man and a white woman was very taboo in the United States. Sex between a white man and a black woman may have been frowned upon and technically illegal, there was never a huge amount of effort to enforce this. On the other hand, a black man who had sex with a white woman was in very real danger of being murdered for doing so. This made such relationships particularly forbidden, and people often get a thrill out of doing things they are not supposed to be doing. For example, most guys do not want their sexual partners to be “sluts” in the traditional sense of the word. However, a lot of these same guys enjoy seeing a porn actress act like or call herself a slut because they get a kick out of enjoying a behavior they are technically not supposed to be doing. When you combine these to aspects you get the formula that a lot of porn relies on. “She’s such a slut, you what an insatiable bestial sex fiend she is? She’ll actually have sex with (cue dramatic organ music)… black guys!” Now not all interracial porn is like this. But a lot of it is.

3.Gay men and length. I have been told it has something to do with hitting the prostate during anal sex. That being said, I have several gay male friends, and they seem far less interested in penis sizes than straight men do.

  1. Flaccid Size. Flaccid penis size will vary a lot based mostly on temperature. Flaccid size has almost no correlation to erect size. One interesting thing to note is that while black men only average 0.2 inches larger than white men for erect penis size, they averaged almost an inch longer in flaccid size. Which is probably where the notion that they would be bigger when erect came from.
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Nicely done secretaryofevil. I’m going to bump this thread up with another video.

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“First of all, watching porn to learn something about sex is like watching Rambo II to learn about the Vietnam War. - SecretaryofEvil”

This is going to be a quote I won’t soon forget. Thanks, and interesting discussion.

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Still waiting for a woman’s perspective (answer) to post #20.

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This brings up a point which I forgot to mention. So many people have already brought up such cliche points as: it’s the personality which really counts, it’s what’s on the inside that matters, society is so past judging people so superficially, etc…

But don’t we tend to build general implications and assumptions about people by the way they look? Doesn’t it happen all the time? Even if you make an effort not to do it, it still kinda sits in the back of your mind. I’ve taken a short psychology course before and I think I remember hearing how its been statistically tested that people tend to assume others who are more attractive to also be more confident, charismatic, and optimistic. Vice versa, people who are unattractive tend to be assumed as more timid, monotonous, and pessimistic, regardless if the they are really that way or not. It’s like a subconscious impulse.

I guess the opposite effect can also occur too where you might assume an ugly person would try to severely overcompensate for their ugliness by being extremely funny or exuberant; but then it again these expressions are probably not manifested authentically but rather out of bitter irony. Which in this case, you’re really still assuming that these people actually have timid, monotonous, and pessimistic undertones beneath their facades.

These concepts of stereotyping are used all the time in tv shows, movies, etc. The good looking people are usually the more “normal” type of characters while someone who’s fat and ugly is usually something more polarizing like a really dumb person or someone really evil.

So ya, you might say, “well for me it’s the persona that counts” but aren’t you also simultaneously thinking “…but this ugly bastard’s mostly likely an asshole or an insecure, awkward mess with all kinds of issues. It’s a safer bet sticking to the more attractive/normal person”.

Or maybe when it comes to hiring someone for a job you think “hmmm…this person’s smoking hot, but probably a shallow airhead. I’m gonna go with the ugly bastard who’s going to constantly try to overcompensate for being so aesthetically challenged”

Again, yes yes yes, there’s always exceptions but we’re talking about what you think happens overall.

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Even this is not universal, judging by my wife’s reaction to it happening.

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That size doesn’t matter . . . if you can oscillate at 800/min?

That’s not very hopeful.

–
Where nature is inadequate, science must compensate!

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If it is beyond imagining how the dick can be applied to intercourse in any manner than straight in, straight out, at X pace, then I strongly urge those lacking such imagination to apply themselves to getting an education on the subject.

Having said that, the most obvious things to consider are angle and pace. My ex, with my help in the form of clear response during sex and clear, specific discussion during non-sexual moments, was the first man to bring me to orgasm using only his penis, and it involved discovering the best way to bring it into contact with my clitoris during intercourse. One that was achieved, additional years of practice, refinement and experience made it easier and easier to acheive orgasm that way with less and less direct stimulation, the end result being that my orgasmic response essentially spread out beyond the clitoris itself and sort of “hooked up” with the nerves of my vagina so that I now experience orgasms that are much more delicious and, well, “comprehensive”, for lack of a beter word right now.

All of which to say: he knew how to use it. He also “used” it much more delightfully in less orgasm-focused ways, employing angle, pacing, and depth changes.

It seems very obvious to me, but I understand that it doesn’t necessarily to everyone, and if any ment want to be better lovers no matter what the size of their dicks, and they can’t, on their own, figure out how, there’s lots of books on the subject, as well as videos. The information is out there and here’s the bottom line: great sex can be learned, any penis can bring some kind of pleasure to a woman if the owner makes it a priority, and for most women, great sex involves much more than the penis, so don’t neglect everything else.