The Fat Moronic Bitch Who Bumped My Brand New Car

The BBQ Pit
141

“And yes, when a person allows themself to get that large, I do think it is a reflection on their personality”

Fat chick checking in.

I agree.

When you see someone my size (or the size of the lady that hit you), 99% of the time you are looking at the walking wounded.

Everyone’s got pain, man, and everyone finds a way to medicate it. Some people medicate by intentionally hurting other people any way they can. Some people drink. Some people have indiscriminate sex with anything with a pulse. Some people snort coke. Some people shop and get themselves into thousands and thousands of dollars in debt.

Some people eat.

Point is, everyone finds a way to deal with their issues. Almost all the ways we find to ease our pain are unhealthy (unless we replace our unhealthy ways with healthy ones). My guess is that seeing someone who is really really fat stands out in your mind more because they “assault” your line of vision. Not so for say, someone with just as many issues as say, me, only instead of eating they have 10 maxed-out credit cards and a reposessed car.

Incidentally, I do think that most of the time, obesity is a choice. I know it was for me. For reasons unknown, it was working for me on some level, or I wouldn’t have been so fat for 25 years. Then I decided to turn my will over to God, and also I decided that diabetes in 10 years or so and an early grave wasn’t working for me, so I started moving my ass at the gym and changing the way I eat. For me, it was all about choice.

Why is it OK for someone to choose to, say, scar their lungs with cigarettes day in and day out, but not OK for them to choose to get fat?

And while we’re on it, I have one tiny fender bender to my name thus far and no speeding tickets. And I hit a parked truck last month and slightly damaged the bumper and I left my name and number so kiss my ass if you think that I’m somehow less honest now than I will be when I get to my goal weight.

142

And you think any of us didn’t know that? That there are fat people who could lose weight if they stopped eating so much?

Listen, I know that. I know that not all fat people are necessarily fat people by choice. But some certainly are.

So I still don’t get it. I still don’t get why some people (and I’m not necessarily directing this at you, Weirddave) feel the need to point out the obvious: that some fat people could lose weight if they wanted to. OK. Point conceded. Conceded a long time ago, by many of us. No argument from me. Yeah. Yesirree Bob. Some people who are fat are fat because they don’t want to be thin bad enough.

So, now that I’ve nicely conceded that (never disputed that), could anyone (not just you, Weirddave, just anyone) please point out to me WHY it often seems so necessary to point out that fat people can change? Because invariably, when someone brings up how hurtful it is being treated like shit because they’re fat, someone else will point out that, “Well, you could lose weight, you know.” And when alice_in_wonderland pointed out that fat people get treated like shit, just like certain other groups that get targeted, you had to jump in and say, “Well, being fat isn’t the same as being black or jewish, because fat people can change.”

And I’d like to understand—why point that out? Why do people ever need to point that out? And even if some people think that fat people can’t control their weight (and I think we all can agree that some really can’t, because of some medical reason), why even then do you need to bring it up that fat people (some fat people, anyway) could change if they wanted to? Why bring it up in this context? I’m not suggesting that you never bring it up at all, but why bring it up when we are discussing the cruel way some fat people are treated? Why? What difference can it possibly make whether they can change the way they are or not? What bearing does that have on the inappropriate behavior of others towards them?

Could someone please explain to me what difference it makes? Because I’ve never gotten a satisfactory answer to that.

143

Absolutely. My suggestion is, should you find yourself in such a position, is to walk up to her car and then, after a brief hesitation, say “My God, it’s hideous! look at the kids And it has spawned…” Then slowly walk away with a disgusted face.

144

Oh, second or third post in, if I recall correctly.

145

Yeah, can people calm the fuck down already and not turn this into an obesity thread? I also wish people would stop jumping up Weirddaves’s ass crack for saying there’s a difference between being fat and being black. There is. The OP was about some monstrous bitch who thought it was okay to break the law, rather than be a god damned ADULT about it and settle the accident in a moral and LEGAL fashion. If that broad had crashed into my car, I’d have made fun of her weight, her face, her crappy ass minivan and anything else I could have found wrong with her. Keith, again, I’m sorry about the hit and run. If there’s a hell, she’ll fry there someday.

146

Um Yeah! It was from the very beginning when the OP decided to go ON and ON and ON about the perp’s fatness as if it were the cause of what she’d actually done wrong, (which was to hit and run by the way, in case anyone’s forgotten, including the OP).

Whether fatness is something that fat people “can” control if they want to or not, the OP was wrong in targeting her size and obesity as somehow being related to her crashing into his car.

It was irrelevent to her being a stupid bitch.

But, then you were asking a rhetorical Q huh?:smiley:

147

What if stupid people can’t help being stupid? Should they be ridiculed because they couldn’t find their asses using both hands and a detailed color diagram? Do the people that are forced into a lifetime of servitude at the local fast food restaurant deserve your hate?! You elitist intelligent bastard! Stupid is a name that creates bad feelings and low self-esteem in unintelligent people everywhere! I know three kids that killed themselves in school because kids called them dumb! How do you think their parents would feel now, if they were reading your hate-filled invective about the intelligence-impaired?!?

YOU EVIL HATEFUL STUPIDIST!! (A stupidist being someone who hates stupid people, natch)
(wow, they were right, this PC crap CAN be fun!)

(The above post was sarcastic, for those who might have missed the intended sentiment. God knows I wouldn’t want to be accused of being a Sarcasmist, which is someone who hates people who are unable to detect sarcasm.)

148

The OP used the expression “fat bitch” and everyone jumps at him for saying she was a bitch and bumped into him because she was fat. Makes perfect sense to me!

Besides, he called her glandular-disavantadged so this discussion about choice or condition has no relevancy here. Glad to clear that one up.

To give a more or less serious opinion, to me it’s like ranting that she was an ugly bitch. I, for one, forgive you Keith! Just don’t do it to nice people. On the other hand it’s inevitable and understandable that on a public forum like this that someone takes offense, so go right ahead and be offended.

149

:: shaken::

I…I don’t know. I came into the pit, and I saw a thread title and I…I clicked on it…

:: fighting tears ::

I came in and I knew…I could sense…that something was going to go horribly awry. They say women KNOW these things…I should have known to get out…but then I had this awesome Fast and the Furious joke that I just wanted to get in there…

:: breaking down::

It just all…it all fell apart…I … I DON’T know what happened, or when…I think I’m…I just want to go home and shower with Vin Diesel.

150

[consoling mode]

There, there, JarbabyJ.

There, there.

[/consoling mode]

151

Alice, hate to pile on the piler-on, but can we assume you approve (since you haven’t said you don’t) that it’s okay to point out that she was ugly?

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Alice, hate to pile on the piler-on, but can we assume you approve (since you haven’t said you don’t) of Keith pointing out that she was ugly? I don’t really think you approve of this, I just hate to see a job half-done.

153

I see the ‘offended on behalf of _______’ crowd has set up camp here, have their tent pitched and are currently proving that they are no more tolerant than any ‘fat basher’ since they seem to think it’s perfectly OK that this woman committed a hit and run.

So, how’s the car? Any idea what it’s going to take to get that fixed? Considered calling the police and just giving a description of the minivan and the driver?

If you do give a description to the police, make sure none of the ‘stamp out ignorance’ Dopers are around. You wouldn’t want them to lecture you for telling the cops that she was a very fat woman. Although that is necessary info for an accurate description.

So big deal the OP was pissed off and he ranted. I’d be pissed off too if my brand new car just got hit by some careless fucknugget. And I’d probably throw in a few jabs about their looks, even if they were a Claudia Schiffer stand-in. Something like ‘Why the fuck did that pretty-prissy bitch think the law don’t apply to her Estee-Lauder ass?’

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Weirddave said:

Sure! Weight Watchers and Overeaters Anonymous are terrific for losing weight! As I’ve said before, that is not the problem. Keeping the weight off is – even if you are able to continue the program. Most people who diet gain back more than they lost. You can diet your way into obesity.

And your point is? Earlier you implied that the bariatric phyysician who provided me with this information was in it for profit. This organization that you dismiss is nonprofit. I also cited another organization that coordinates scientific research on weight loss. You have yet to provide me with any reputable links that, in essence, weight loss is a matter of will power.

I’m pleased that your first wife and Ginger have been able to lose weight. One of them has been able to keep it off for four years and that is great! Maybe she is one of the 5%! Not everyone is capable of doing that and science doesn’t know why.

Would you still feel that way it it were something that could not be changed? At any rate, persecution is persecution. I’ve paid my dues on racial and feminist issues.

Spooje mentioned Overeaters Anonymous. That is a pretty good organization for losing weight! I’ve tried almost every weightloss program – including a 475 calorie a day liquid diet which I was perfectly willing to stay on FOREVER. But I was not allowed to continue to do that more than a few months because it was damaging my body chemistry.

Since Spooje and Weirddave say that they are stating facts, I think it is reasonable to ask what reputable scientific studies you are basing your “facts” on? If you say that weight loss is a matter of choice and that those who are morbidly obese and even just obese are that way because of will power, where is the data that you are basing your opinions on. If it is “just a fact,” surely such research abounds. Examples provided so far have been anecdotal – including my own.

Please read current studies. That’s all you have to do to see that scientists disagree with you.

I would also like to know if you are familar with “set points”?

Also, do you think that people in general lose their will power as they grow older? Do pregnant women lose their will power after the birth of the child? If weight is related to will power, then are we as a country losing all self-discipline? Finally, if you don’t mind sharing, why do you “choose” to remain fat?

I hope that you don’t hear me as yelling at you. I am asking you to set your misconceptions and misinformation aside, open your mind and do a little reading.

I also wish to apologize to the OP for being insensitive to his frustration in having a hit and run driver damage his car. She is an asshole.

155

Zoe, I just got done reeading the study from the NIH. I’m not sure if it’s exactly what you were refering to on the previous page, but it was the number 1 google hit on " National Institutes of Health Technology Assessment Conference Panel, “Methods for Voluntary Weight Loss and Control” It dosen’t exactly say what you’re claiming it says. True, it does state:

Nowhere in the article does it say that only 5% of overweight people are able to lose weight and keep it off. It is interesting to note that the study repeadetly stresses the following points:

There’s more, but that last quote is the most important one. The conclusions of the study seem to be not that “95% of overweight people are unable to lose weight” but rather that people who lose weight fail to continue with the program that helped them lose it in the first place (whatever it is )and that THAT is the reason for long term failure. In addition, they say the following about increasing exercize and modifying diet:

Pretty much exactly what I’ve been saying all along. You can lose weight, but to keep it off you’re going to have to change your lifestyle. It IS that simple.

156

It hasn’t happened a lot as of late, but I have to say it: I agree with Weirddave. Not that it has a lot to do with the OP, of course, but there you go.

157

Disclaimer- I do not think fat-bashing is right, I went over alot of the factual material and links contained within (thank you btw, I learned alot, I don’t and have never had a weight problem on the upper end of the scale, I have a seriously overactive metabolism, my problem is managing to retain enough weight to not look skeletal, and yes, it can also be a life threatening problem. When I was pregnant, my metabolism went haywire and I lost 25 pounds the first month. I’m 5’8" and only weighed 130 to begin with, I damn near lost the pregnancy and had to drink 4 2000 calorie shakes a day in addition to stuffing myself just to maintain weight. My SO, however could stand to lose a few pounds, and have been trying to learn how I can cook better for him, think we’re gonna try the low carb high protein route), and fully sympathaize with those with the opposite problem as mine.

However…

I think, seeing as it’s been reported from MANY reputable sources that obesity has reached epidemic proportions in this country, even and especially in children, the answer is a resounding yes. More sedentary habits and fast food/pre-processed food hasn’t helped, since it’s far easier/quicker to do that on a stretched time budget than cook a full meal.

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And therein lies the question:

Why do they gain the weight back. Speaking as one who has both lost and gained, I submit this: They go back to their old ways. They do not stay the course which provided the desired results. It is not the program that failed. It is that the people stopped working it.

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My experience is definitely consistent with this. I lost 60 lbs in 1999. Losing it took a major lifestyle change (almost exclusively a change in diet - I didn’t start exercising regularly until I’d lost most of the weight), and maintaining that lifestyle change has been the challenge. Over the next two years or so, my weight fluctuated about 5 lbs, which was fine. I regained about 10 lbs last year, due to a lot of stress and change in my life which caused me to … wait for it … go back to some of my old eating habits. Big surprise. This year I’ve been sick and so my activity level has been almost nil. So of course even though I haven’t been eating much, the weight hasn’t come off. Now I’m feeling better and committed to getting more active (just started Yoga again this week and I’m really sore), and I’m committed to going back to low-carb eating (thank you, Dr. Atkins).

I’ve found that losing the weight wasn’t that hard, but finding an eating plan that I could do the rest of my life was. I fell off the wagon, but I’m getting back on. Also, maintaining weight loss is tough because once you reach goal weight, you start adding back in some of the things you cut out - more calories, more fat, more carbs, more of whatever you cut out. Less exercise, whatever. It’s really touch to gauge how much more. A dessert here, a dessert there. And the next time around, it’s harder to lose the weight. Luckily I’m not one of those who regained all my weight before I got my wake up call that I need to go back to my old eating and exercise plan.

One other thing I’d like to add, though, again mainly from personal experience. It’s really tough to not eat if your brain is telling you it’s time to eat. I’ve been on lots of different meds for my migraines, and some of them had side effects of being appetite stimulants (they really fuck around with your brain chemistry). I gained 40 lbs in a year as a result of one of these meds. It controlled my migraines very well, it just made we want to eat all the damn time. The med I’m on now has a side effect of being an appetite depressant. I also know that if I eat a lot of carbs, it’s like a switch goes on in my brain that tells me to eat more and more carbs, even if my stomach is full. I wonder how much variation there is among people in regards to whatever chemical it is in the brain that tells people “It’s time to eat.” As I said, it’s pretty damn tough to resist this if your brain chemistry is out of whack, whether through meds or just because it’s naturally out of balance. I have some days now where I have to force myself to eat enough food (today I’ve had a piece of whole wheat toast and a low-carb bar).

I don’t fault people who have surgery to help them lose weight. Whatever people need to do, more power to them. But I just wanted support what Weirddave was saying with my own anecdote.

160

What is particularly specially sizeist about this insult is that unlike “fat” just being used as an insult in term of size, using it with “headed” derives from the assumption that “fat”=stupid.

I trust this was conscious irony.