Yes, I’m starting a new thread for this. But I’ll post a link to the old thread and see if I can copy some of the previous comments. The old thread:
http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?threadid=85096&pagenumber=1
The “OFFICIAL” Minutes for the Houston Dopefest (aka HouDope) meeting for Saturday, September 29, 2001, 6 pm at the Baker Street Pub and Grill.
It began when I (Irishman) rolled in early and snagged some tables. Shortly thereafter, MsRobyn arrived, followed by BigGiantHead who was parking the car. Meaningless chitchat ensued while ordering beverages and confusing the waitress.
At some point, beatle strolled in, and subsequently my friend Brent (a non-SDMB poster but guest at previous HouDope) dropped by. Eventually conversation became focused enough to begin jotting down the notes.
It was mentioned we wouldn’t be graced by the presence of Robgruver. Apparently he got sick. I’m sure he hated that. It was also pointed out that Sealemon and Bubble Girl weren’t there as they were satisfying a previous commitment of caring for their just born daughter. http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?threadid=89928
MsRobyn brought up the news of the day that maybe some American soldiers had been caught in Afghanistan (?), but that she wasn’t sure because “Somebody swiped the newspaper off my front porch again dammit!” that will soon if not already be a Pit thread. Nobody was sure what was up with that. The soldier thing, not the stolen paper. Everyone professed innocence on the paper as well. 
One of our previous places of congregation was brought up. The illustrious Ale House has since departed for the great construction project in the sky. It was bought out and apparently the lot is being converted to a parking lot and/or a giant bookstore. Which sparked me to recall that The Ale House was supposedly haunted. “What happened to the ghost? Did she move on? Relocate to the Spaghetti Warehouse (another supposedly haunted Houston locale)? Stay around to haunt the new parking lot?” Someone said there was a rumor the owners were going to relocate and open a new Ale House somewhere. “Will the ghost move with them? I can see it now - The New Ale House, all new location, same old food, same old ghost.”
Somewhere in here TheNerd and Roadrash (formerly CoolDude) meandered in.
MsRobyn mentioned working in health care, on the billing side. It was pointed out that contrary to what one might think, the worst offenders in not paying are actually the insurance companies. Plus they have an obligatory lie three times policy before finally admitting they aren’t going to pay. This, of course, brought up going to court, and hence lawyers.
Beatle then brought up having worked in a private self-owned partnership for a number of years. “In 10 years, we ended up being sued twice and sued somebody once.”
MsRobyn: “That’s actually a pretty good record.”
beatle: “Especially for a business that uses dynamite.”
Scotticher arrived and passed out hugs. Shortly after was her ride, JimB (pronounced “Jim” - the b is silent like in dumb ) after parking the car. Scotticher picked the chair next to me (I’m so lucky!), little knowing how that would ensure her a prominent position in the meeting minutes.
Scotticher mentioned that she had to have her name pronounced for her. At her first Dopefest, someone asked how she pronounced her name and she said she’d never said it aloud. Never considered vocalizing it until then.
Ayesha and LionSOB finally arrived, late as usual, but not the latest of the bunch. Ayesha walked in with a baby on her shoulder, then as she approached the table she threw it at beatle. [dramatic pause] It was a doll. (whew!)
Next the conversation near me went on to discuss Scotticher’s road trips through Texas, and “doing Texas on the installment plan”. She’s been to Grapevine/Dallas/Ft. Worth, San Antonio and the Alamo, Austin, and now Galveston/Houston. It’s been pointed out if she want’s to go to Amarillo (and the panhandle), El Paso, or Corpus Christi, she’ll have to take herself. I think I convinced her it would be easier to fly to New Mexico, then drive to El Paso from the other side.
Scotticher admits she’s geographically challenged. At first she didn’t know where Texas is located - she thought it was below Arizona and New Mexico. Then she didn’t realize just how big it is. When using a road atlas, states get layed out at whatever scale makes them take up about 1 page. (In mine Texas gets two pages.) This has the absurd effect of making the pages not scale to each other. So her intuitive idea was that all states are about the same size, and the maps confirm that theory. So it only takes about 4 hours to drive all the way across Washington State, so she didn’t realize just how far away Dallas is from San Antonio, for example.
On the ride down from Dallas with JimB she didn’t want to miss any of the sights. JimB - “There isn’t anything to miss.” But she did get to see the prison in Hunstville. That big thing with the towers surrounded by fences and barbed wire? Yep, that’s the prison. And then there’s this huge white statue of Sam Houston in the middle of nowhere (well, just outside Huntsville, but there’s nothing around it but I-45 driving past).
BigGiantHead was carrying on a conversation with one end of the table about going to sea on a submarine. He talked about “angles and dangles”. When the subs launch, they do a quick test to check that everything is properly stowed and is not going to pop loose and make noise, so they do a rapid descend and ascend - thus the colorful name of the technique. And inevitably during this operation there’s somebody sitting on a pallet at one end of the hallway that takes off like a rocket.
Scotticher passed on a bit of wisdom gleaned from the “original” Scottimom - “If you marry for money, you will earn it.”
One conversation I didn’t hear much of mentioned the fascination with “The Dukes of Hazzard”. And a recent reunion movie set in LA. Some tricked out car with powered shocks comes bouncing by, and they of course have to show what real bouncing is.
Food was ordered off and on and consumed in various sequences whenever it arrived. This caused much confusion as there was noisy music and the background ambient was loud enough that we couldn’t hear the server with the food calling out dishes to get them to the correct party. Note to Roadrash - when the food arrives, shut up and listen.
Somewhere in here Zap Rowsdower (Zap who?) showed up.
On discussing the topics covered by Cecil’s columns, Scotticher admitted that back when she was young and stupid (I fail to believe she was ever stupid, and I thought she still was young) she was gasp reading Cosmopolitan, and came across someone asking the question, “I’m on a diet but my husband wants me to swallow. How many calories does it have?” She commented that the only reason she read the question was because it was so strikingly weird and her curiousity wondered (a) why would you really care, and (b) how would you find that out? The doctor answering the question gave some reasonable guess, and then said something to the effect that the pleasure afforded her husband was probably worth more than the few calories consumed.
People stole Scotticher’s carrots. But they left her celery. (We did not! ) Don’t believe them. Okay, I didn’t witness it, but I believe Scotticher. (Sucking up enough for you?)
Ayesha asked JimB to switch seats so she could sit next to Scotticher.
LionSOB: “Oh really, dear, is there something you haven’t told me?”
Ayesha: “Yes, dear, have you ever wondered why I call you Michelle in bed?”
In a separate conversation at the other end of the table, Roadrash was overheard to say, “My balls were numb and they stayed numb.” After hours of serious bicycling. “That’s why I took up skating instead.”
LionSOB wants to know if JimB can lick his eyebrows. Not sure why that came up.
Next, the conversation turned to talk about me. ??? Ayesha commented to Scotticher, “He’s got the fastest metabolism I’ve seen. I don’t know where he puts it all.”
Scotticher then leaned over and whispered to Ayesha. Hmmmm. Then she said out loud, “Don’t embarrass him - he’s bulemic.” Thanks. (I don’t know where that comment comes from. I mean, I arrive hungry so I always want to eat right away. Then we usually stay for 5 or 6 hours, so I’m hungry again. )
Scotticher is a hugaholic. Oh, and she did pass out the hugs for Purplebear as promised.
After reading my notes, Scotticher tells me that she does not have a very dirty mind. She thinks that is believable.
Wild tangent - discussing aging and gray hair. BigGiantHead - “I really like a woman with one streak of gray hair on one side.”
Roadrash: “The Lily Munster look?”
“Irishman told me to write a note, so I’m writing a note.” - MsRobyn.
Scotticher made the rounds. Hugging, man, only HUGGING! (heart) Cheri
BigGiantHead brought flowers for the ladies. Suck up.
[Inserted note]
BigGiantHead brought roses for the ladies. Since none showed up, he gave them to me, Ayesha, and Robyn! BGH is a gentleman and a scholar. And cute, too! Single Doperladies take NOTE!
Irishman opens the menu.
Scotticher: “What are you doing?”
Irishman: “I’m looking at this.”
Scotticher: “Are you going to eat again?”
Irishman: “Just looking… Well, maybe just dessert.”
Scotticher rolls eyes (in a nice way)
Irishman was told that Ayesha likes hugging JimB best. LionSOB is getting a bucket of water.
Ayesha’s doll has the lovely name Polly Esther. All the men “handled” Polly Esther. Polly got “teaed” on. Poor baby. Then she got stuffed in the bag again.
Irishman got a HUGE bowl of cobbler a la mode. Scotticher informed him that he had best be FAT next time she sees him.
Scotticher informed the group that their presence is required on President’s Day weekend at the Grace/Scotti birthday dopefest. BigGiantHead and Roadrash offered to wear Toga’s and do the “Gator” at said dopefest. (That’s something from Animal House.) Scotti smiled.
The group cleared up Road Rash’s confusion over some screen names - apparently at the last HouDope he attended, he attached the identity of “Ayesha” to Robgruver, and was somewhat confused as to who the lady was at this assembly. He also invited everyone to come see him at the Texas Renaissance Festival.
[/inserted notes]
Bad Bad Leroy Brown was playing on the radio overhead. “Got a 32 gun in his pocket for fun”
Irishman: “Not sure a pocket is the best place for your 32 gun.”
Scotticher: “Probably better in your back pocket, huh.”
Ayesha likes Irishman’s shaved look better. (Let you guess at just what was shaved. )
[inserted remark]
As alsways, the New Dopers were great company including 1st timers and out of town and out of state visiting dopers.
[/inserted remark] - Ayesha
Right about here, a live band showed up. Well, two guys with guitars and microphones. They started playing even louder. They were pretty good, but conversation became even more challenging. “What?” “I can’t hear you.” “What?”
beatle: “The guys are playing mostly KLOL lineup, the songs are typically by metal bands, but they’re playing acoustic. Still, it’s pretty good.”
Note from MsRobyn:
This has been a great time!!! I really enjoyed meeting BGH, Road Rash, and Zap and Scotti, and seeing everyone again. We really ought to do this more often. Oh, and Airman Doors is here in spirit.
“When Scotti’s happy, everyone’s happy.” Right.
At some point I had difficulty navigating my way out of my chair. The sides of the back wedged between my neighbors’ chairs and the raised platform behind made for a challenging obstacle course.
Various people did various nasty things with Polly Esther. And took pictures. 
Cheri says “You people are evil.”
Polly’s drinking all Jim’s beer. And smoking a cigarrette. Shame on her.
Suddenly, we had a new arrival - at 10 pm or so. Captain Nemo made his debut. “Hey wait, I’ve met Little Nemo and you’re not him.” - Doh! (Yep, that was me. Fortunately it wasn’t out loud, and I got it all straightened out in my head before the band took a break and we could hear again.)
Captain Nemo came in from 1960. (which is a state “Farm Road” on the other side of Houston from where we were.
Scotti: “What?”
beatle: “That was 31 years ago, no wonder he’s late.”
Captain Nemo: “I’m looking for a way to use the camera, and possibly the small child [Polly Esther] to hit on the girls behind me.”
Irishman: “Aren’t we all.”
beatle: "Someone wrote ‘Viva Honduras!’ in the restroom. What the heck - ok - Viva… wait! Were they in the Soccer War?
Now there is scribed in the notes a set of curvey lines. I will not try to replicate them with ASCII art at this time. Suffice it to say, it looks like alien space ships or slanted eyes under a bald head. Or, as beatle tells it according to one lady, like “boobs and butts”.
There were a round of pictures taken numerous times to document the group and our activities. At one point, it looked like Scotticher was trying to take a picture of the girls at the table next to us (why I have no idea, that’s just how it looked). I commented on this to JimB. One of the women had a somewhat low cut blowse on. Subsequently, he actually did use Scotti’s camera to take a picture of the girls. He says he was doing me a favor. Right. They noticed.
“Another note from Robyn - Jesus this Band’s LOUD!”
Irishman’s editorial comment: Jesus didn’t do anything about it.
Scotticher note:
I have to say, I think it is really perverted for you all to be taking pics of someone’s cleavage with MY camera. I mean to say, if I felt the need to have pictures of someone’s cleavage I could take pics of my own. And JFYI, I DON’T!
beatle:
Reminds me of my 6th grade acquaintance who one day let loose with “Con’t you wish you were a girl, man? Then you could take off your clothes and look at yourself whenever you want!” Don’t know what became of him.
It’s now JimB’s birthday. 53! (You don’t look a day over 60. )
beatle: “Man, I’ll never catch up…”
Scotti: “Happy Birthday to you, happy birthday to you, you’re older than I am, Y’all always will be that, too!”
Jim: “I’m just that much better than y’all too!”
beatle: We look to you for guidance, Jim… you’re leading the way!"
Scotti: “Sheesh - beatle darlin’ - are you REALLY sure you wanna go where JimB leads?”
beatle: “I’m being nice.”
JimB: “But Scotti and beatle, it is such a good way I’m leading. I’m sure y’all will love it.”
The band next played Hotel California.
Captain Nemo: “And thanks to the SDMB, I know what “colitas” are.”
Ayesha: “These horrible people have corrupted my baby. They gave her beer and cigarettes and took pictures of that too.”
Scotti: “EXCUSE ME! Not me, Ayesha love. It was these… well, nevermind.”
'Night all!
Okay, the notes run out here. About this point we called it quits, split up the bill, Scotticher hugged everybody, and we went our separate ways.
It was a blast. Except for the drive home, when I drove up to 59, wanted to go north but there was road construction on the on ramp and a detour south, so I follow that to the on ramp there, and find myself right behind a car accident on 59 backing up the traffic for who knows how far, and no way off to go around. ACK! 20 minutes sitting on the ramp before finally getting on.
The shindig was a blast. The crew was great. We had 13 people, plus Polly Esther. We missed out on Robgruver, Sealemon and Bubble Girl, and Momapotamus.
Everybody else’s turn to fill in the gaps.
