Read the instructions.
Don’t just do something, sit there. (It’s a Buddhist thing.)
Don’t pet burning dogs.
Never explain, your friends don’t need it and your enemies won’t believe it.
Nothing personal, but I have to do this… 
I’d rather have a free bottle in front of me than a pre-frontal lobotomy.
Never eat anything you can’t pronounce.
Don’t forget to breathe.
Backup your data. Often.
File names have to match exactly.
He who hesitates is lost.
Never eat anything bigger than your head.
There’s a lot to be said for keeping your mouth shut.
Don’t take advice from random strangers on the internet.
Don’t wait until tomorrow to do what you really want to do, or all you’ll end up with is a bunch of empty yesterdays.
No emotion is the final one.
There ain’t no free lunch.
Regards,
Shodan
Double check the drive letter before formatting it.
This too shall pass.
Bonus advice: Always mount a scratch monkey.
Don’t kill the goose that lays the golden egg.
From my mom: A man’s not the one who can drink the most, he’s the one who knows when to quit.
There’s no downside to being an asshole.