Dallas. It’s the Monday Night game.
Get on board, little chillun, there’s room for many a-more. 
How bad do the Redskins currently suck?
In terms of points scored and allowed, they’re the worst team in the NFL, every which way.
In four games, they’ve scored 25 points and given up 135. That means they’re losing by an average score of 34-6. The other serious winless teams (I don’t consider the Titans to be a serious winless team; they’ve been the second-best team in football two seasons running) stack up like this: Dallas, 66-110, is losing by an average of 28-17. Buffalo, 71-128, is losing by an average of 32-18. Detroit, 20-87, is losing by an average of 29-7.
The Redskins lead the league in points allowed, straight up and per game. And only one team has scored fewer points than the Redskins, but the Lions have scored their 20 points in 3 games, so the Redskins have fewer points per game than the Lions.
If we look at yardage gained and allowed, the Redskins are just about as bad there - maybe worse, depending on how you look at it.
The Redskins’ defense - fourth in the league last year - is third-worst in the NFL in per-game yardage given up this year - 374 yards per game . By comparison, the Cowboys have given up 331 y/g, the Lions 353, and the Bills 365.
The Redskins’ offense has managed a mere 174 yards per game this season. That’s worst in the league by an incredible 48 y/g. By comparison to the peer group, Dallas has gained 222 y/g, Detroit 298, and Buffalo 318.
So the Bills have been outgained by 47 y/g, the Lions by 55, the Cowboys by 109. The Redskins? By 200. Yeepers. See why I think they’re in a class by themselves?
And they can’t exactly blame it on the caliber of their opponents. The Redskins’ opponents are 6-6 against the rest of the league, the Cowboys’ are 6-5, the Bills’ are 4-5, and the Lions’ are 7-2. The Lions are the only team in this group that can blame it on strength of schedule: two of their three losses have been against two of the league’s genuine studs, the Rams and Packers. And their third was against the Browns, who are 3-1.
So, despite a somewhat better defensive showing last week, the Redskins still have some serious suckage going on. And given the absolute abysmalness of their offense, it seems to me that any opponent, even a bad one, can stay in the game with the Redskins the entire way, and once they do that, they’ll get some points eventually, and the Redskins won’t match them.
That should apply quite well to Dallas this coming Monday, assuming they don’t just jump out front to begin with; their QB has already known success against this defense, after all.
Last week, the Redskins ran 52 offensive plays. Stephen Davis touched the ball on 13 of them (12 run, 1 pass). And this is in a game where the Redskins were only one score behind until the last 3 minutes, so it wasn’t like they had to pass. This would have been an excellent game to pass just enough so that the Giants’ defense couldn’t stack up too much against the run, but otherwise pound, pound, pound as much as possible.
The one positive I knew about Schottenheimer, coming into this season, was that Davis would carry the ball enough times to make a difference. I knew Marty wouldn’t repeat Norv’s inexplicable tendency to go entirely to the pass, and completely forget about Davis’ existence, in the middle of games. I would’ve bet serious money on this. Good thing I never got the chance, huh? :rolleyes:
Good thing, indeed.
OK, we all know that Marty has zero experience as a general manager, but how do you explain the fact that he’s forgotten how to call a running play?
It’s unbelievable.
Some possible explanations for Schottenheimer’s coaching:
He had a stroke that never got diagnosed.
He’s decided he hates coaching, and is making a bid to get fired, so he can collect his guaranteed salary.
He wants his brother/son to inherit his job RIGHT NOW.
He’s been gambling too much, and has taken to betting against his own team.
He’s not really Marty Schottenheimer. It’s somebody else. Who?
Can I get a little help solving this mystery? Who is this guy who is impersonating Marty Schottenheimer? And where is the real Marty Schottenheimer?
OTOH, this is the most interested I’ve been in NFL football in a lotta years (ever since I moved to Baltimore the day the team rode outta town).
See y’all on Monday! Roll 'Skins Roll!
The Washington Post had a story this morning about the glory days of the 'Skins-Cowboys rivalry under George Allen, Jack Pardee, and Joe Gibbs. Man, it used to be fun - even when we lost.
I had the impression that the rivalry lost its fire during the Norv years, that during his tenure it became more like any other game. And I don’t see that fire coming back this year, when both teams are coming into this game 0-4, neither team has a QB worth speaking of, and the Redskins seem to have just plain lost their way.
There have been hints over the past few days that the Redskins will lean on the pass, offensively, because that’s where the Cowboys’ defense is weak. Nice theory, but that was true of the Giants’ defense, too, and the Redskins did better on the ground than in the air, to the extent that they ran the ball, which wasn’t much.
There’s nothing wrong with having an appreciation of your opponent’s strengths and weaknesses, but not to the extent that it causes you to forget about your own. The Redskins have Stephen Davis at RB; he’s their only certified stud on offense. This game’s probably going to be another low-scoring game, and assuming that comes to pass, there will be no excuse to not run Davis often, both early and late.
But Marty won’t run him. Buahahahahahaha!!!
Yes, it’s time to get back into the spirit of this thing. The Redskins suck because Marty has no clue, and it’s time to enjoy it. Davis will be lucky if he gets 15 carries, the Redskins will lose to a pretty terrible Dallas team and look awful in doing so, and best of all, it’ll be on MNF, so the entire country will get to see how absolutely abysmal we are!!!
People will be jumping on the SuckWagon[sup]TM[/sup] right and left, signing up in droves from all across this land. Tomorrow we will go 0-5, and in this key loss, demonstrate that we are capable of sucking worse than even the worst of the other teams in the NFL, making us a sure bet to go a long way toward 0-16 before anyone has a chance to stop us by fucking up even worse than us.
Hail to the Deadskins!
R-E-D, S-K-I, N-S-U-C-K!
My predictions for the Redskins final season record: 0-17. How you ask? Simple. The Redskins will be the first team in history to suck so bad that they lose their bye week.
[sub]and i’m a fan. innit sad?[/sub]
Well, we already know that they suck so bad, they even managed to suck in a season where no amount of suckage could get them the #1 draft pick, on account of the expansion Houston team.
In the Race To Be the Suckiest Team[sup]TM[/sup], the Redskins took a big step forward yesterday, thanks to the Detroit Lions. In their fourth game of the season, the Lions scored 26 points - more points than the Redskins have scored in all four games combined.
They’re still winless, and they’re still really bad, but any team that picks themselves up off the floor, down 31-6, and scores 3 straight TDs to close within a TD with over 6 minutes to go, cannot aspire to the same level of suckosity as the 'Skins.
I mean, at their current rate of production, that represents 12 games’ worth of TDs for the Redskins. And the Lions managed that in 15 minutes.
Wonder if the 'Skins will score a TD tonight…
I’m sorry, but I’m just not quite convinced yet. It depends on the outcome of tonight’s game.
I’ve occasionally noticed a player actually trying to do something in the highlight films. They haven’t yet completely collapsed. They have the opportunity tonight to display that they have, indeed, folded up the tents and are playing for the #2 pick. If they do that, then I’ll buy my ticket on the Suckwagon.
I think, Rysdad, that you have a valid point. Tonight will be the acid test for how bad the Redskins really are. They frequently fail to show up for division games, but there’s usually at least some spark. Tonight they have the chance to shine, to be truly, truly inutterably horrible.
God, I love my team. <snif> Go 'Skins!
On any team - even the worst - there are generally a few individuals who never lie down and quit. That includes this year’s Deadskins. Can you imagine Darrell Green mailing it in? Or Stephen Davis not fighting for every yard? Neither can I.
Of course, this relies on Marty letting Darrell on the field, and telling the QB to hand the ball to Davis.
The problem is, even then, the Cowboys have a stud at RB too - and while I think the world of Stephen Davis, the fact remains that Emmitt Smith is a great RB, and Davis has thousands of yards to go before he can be placed in the same class. The 'Skins couldn’t stop Smith last December, with Wright QBing, and I don’t see that they can stop him now. Meanwhile, the Redskins have to show that they can cross the goal line - something they’ve only accomplished once in four games.
I think Gazoo’s call of Dallas over 'Skins, 17-9, sounds about right.
…zzzzzzzzz.
…what can ya say. It took work for the 'Skins to pull out that loss at the end, but they were up to it.
At least they ran Stephen Davis, and damned if even that didn’t backfire on them. :rolleyes:
I hate to say they suck, and I feel bad for Stephen Davis, but based on that linebacker’s charmingly acrobatic dive that garnered a 15-yard piling on penalty, you’ve convinced me.
You know we’re bad
We’re bad - you know it
You know we’re bad
We’re bad - you know!
You know we’re bad
We’re bad - you know it
you know
And the whole world has to answer right now
Just to tell you once again. Who’s bad?
Normally, I’d gloat and revel in a Dallas victory over Washington. This time it seems kind of pointless though.
Oh well, at least my team isn’t 0-5.
I just went to the Wash Post website and did the “grade the game” poll…out of 444 responses, 16 people gave the Skins an “A.” 
Those folks must have been confused by the best-of reel they were showing between plays.
QUOTE--------------------Originally posted by Geobabe
I just went to the Wash Post website and did the “grade the game” poll…out of 444 responses, 16 people gave the Skins an “A.” ----------------------------------------------------
They’ve been voting like that since the first preseason game. It’s probably just one guy, voting all night long.
John Riggins says that he thinks this team despises Schottenheimer. They certainly play like it.
Question- how much longer before Dan Snyder decides to fire Marty, and coach the team himself?
Gawd, was that a stinker of a game.
I mean, both teams were pathetic. The Cowboys were pathetic because, although they could roll up and down the field on the Redskins (386 yards total offense; had the ball for nearly 37 minutes), they couldn’t turn yards into points. The Redskins were just pathetic - even against Dallas, they could only manage 7 points. The offense gained only 226 yards, and held the ball for 23 minutes and 15 seconds.
Statistics:
First downs - Dallas 23, Redskins 10.
Net yards gained: Dallas 386 (211 R, 175 P), Redskins 226 (103 R, 123 P).
Possession: Dallas 36:45, Redskins 23:15.
Third down conversion: Dallas 8/16, Redskins 4/11.
How did the 'boys only manage to score 9 points, when they gained respectable yards, and converted half their third downs? They seemed to have a knack of marching downfield, right to the edge of Seder’s effective FG range, then stalling out. This was a sad, sad team. And the stats don’t lie: the Redskins were worse.
At least Marty ran Stephen Davis 23 times (99 yards). That’s a step in the right direction. He’s lost the chance to throw to Stephen Alexander for awhile (Alexander would seem to be a guy cut out for Marty’s offense, such as it is, but you sure can’t tell it by the plays called), and until the TD catch, they didn’t even bother throwing in Westbrook’s direction. Hey, I’m not a real big Michael Westbrook fan, but he’s big, and a good athlete, and throwing to him once in awhile would at least up his trade value, even assuming Marty has essentially exiled him in plain sight.
Scary fact: the Redskins’ 7 points last night actually increases their average scoring per game, from 6.25 ppg to 6.4 ppg. Amazin’. :rolleyes:
I’ve said it before I didn’t think the Redskins had the mettle to go all the way. Hell, I even predicted they’d beat the Giants (wishful thinking, I know…). But, okay, after last night’s pièce de resistance, I’m on the SuckWagon[sup]TM[/sup], too.
Any room for an Eagles fan, Kim?
Normally, I’d look ahead to the 1-4 Panthers and say, “Hey, the Skins can win that game!” but not after last night.
They really suck.
Eagles fans can serve the black champagne.
I managed to tune in after the half and watch one series.
The Redskins went three and out and then the Cowboys got penalized everytime I looked up and had something like a -12 yard series.
Oh my head. Is it time for Spring Training yet?
At least I’ve got my Jordan tix for the year.