Sweeeet…
One, Two!
I feel so loved. 
I could use a hummer!
I’ll have to talk to Astrogirl about that later…
**Mnementh (despite noone having realised he was gone) wanders casually out of the forest, appearing from the foliage as if from nowhere, carrying someone on his shoulders who has been badly beaten and tied up with some sort of plant. He walks to the center of camp, drops the person in a heap, mumbles something and wanders off.
Noone can figure out who this person is or what he’s done.**
Hope it’s not too late to claim this spot. Credentials: one degree in political philosophy, ability to spout obscure quotes from classical texts, and a resemblance to Plato from Beetle Bailey. Who do you want me to quote from first? 
As the sun begins to rise, it’s reddish orange glow seems to steam up from the horizon as the suns beams start to heat the desert sand.
::A couple dopers look off into the distance to see Nicklz coming towards camp. And he seems to have a large group of men pulling his vehicle::
Later after all the troops gather for breakfast he tells the story from begining to end starting off with his impotence problem and how he heard the locals speak off this magic flower, and his hunt for it.
There was a small Taliban regiment about 100 miles NW of our location, I did some recon and left them to get my flower, after repelling down several cliffs I finally found enough flowers, so I decided to head back to base.
packing my gear back into the car suddenely I heard the sound of several vehicles approaching, I grabbed my binoculars and saw two dune buggies with arab men with machine guns.
Needless to say I got into my souped up offroad equipped sportscar and hit the gas. They fired a couple clips at me from a distance, several recoshaying off the built proof rear window. I was able to put some distance between us, and the soon they turned around knowing they weren’t going to be able to catch me.
It was begining to get dark again when the fuel light came on, a brief flash of panick swept over me thinking I may die in the desert or be captured, then I remembered the Taliban camp. Checking my compass and estimated distance I changed directions, figuring I could make it to their base and if I parked a couple miles away they’d never hear or see me coming, being surrounded by the dark night. I eventually found their camp, planning to sneak in and snag a couple extra gas cans get get back to my vehicle.
As I approached the camp I saw the two dune buggies driving off back into night in the direction I was orginally in before my detour, good thing I decided to make that detour, if not I would have run out of gas, and their patrol gaurds would’ve found me. My heart was pounding and adrenaline pumping through my veins, this was the ultimate adrenaline rush sneaking into an enemy base alone.
After a quick stealthly search of the base I found only empty gas can. The only place left to look was the barricks, suddenely I heard the approaching footsteps of the gaurd, I quickly lurched behind a row of wooden crates. Thinkin to myself it’s me or him, me or him. I reach down and take the machety from my leg harness, with one quick precise slice I strike the gaurd right as he is coming around the corner, slitting his throat, the gaurd grabs his throat and falls to the ground. With one last strength of effort he looks up into my eyes, then releases his last breath of air as he dies.
I quickly regather myself and head towards the barricks, I slowly inch the door open, everyone is asleep and in there bunks, I grab my AK-47 in one hand, and with the other I flip on the light as I unload 10 or 12 rounds into the ceiling. Everyone jumps out and starts diving for cover. After a brief search of their barricks I find only one gun which was lying on an unmanned bunk I quickly through it’s strap around my neck, and start motioning everyone against a wall. Not wanting to kill anyone else and thinking
**Sue Duhnym ** needed someone to interogate for inteligence, I herded the men outside and lead them to my car. Taking my repelling ropes from the trunk I tie them to the front bumper motioning for the men to come they realized what I wanted them to do, all but one picked up the ropes, that one guy I left for the vulchers to pick apart. After that the men were surprisingly co-operative.
Sue Duhnym, have fun with your new friends and give us the details after you get them talking.
Hmmph…hope it’s not too late to join up. So many good positions are already taken. Hmmmm…ok, can I be the one carrying around a spiral notebook and pen, always jotting down notes to use later when I write my novel? I’m shy and sensitive, and squeamish about violence, but when my back is against the wall I surprise everyone by turning into a ferociuos fighter who opens up a major can of Whup-Ass[sup]TM[/sup].
Oh yes, and at some point during the mission I…ahhh…overcome my shyness with one of the female members of the team :D.
Nicklz!
My hero!
::bats eyelashes and looks all girly::
I’m so good to see you’re back and safe. You found the flowers, right?
Hardygrrl
Yes I did :
:
All I have to do is brew them into a tea and drink, care to help me in the kitchen???
Sue Duhnym
Everyone is anxiously awaiting word on your torture methods on how you got these Taliban prisoners to talk.
So what’s the scoop!
Already have the water boiling, and while you were gone, I made sure to get the jacuzzi ready…
::Lets her hair down and undoes a few buttons of her uniform::
BTW, with all the kickboxing, my legs are so sore…
::takes Hardygrrl by the hand and leads her to the jacuzzi::
Well I think the warm water, my hands rubbing out the sore tight muscles may just help.
Or the tea might help as well
:wakes up from an acetone fog:
:eek:
Prisoners? We have had prisoners for DAYS now?
Oboyoboyoboy.
:gleefully rubs hands:
Sue, are you still up for it? If not, your ever-ready assistant is prepared to step in…
Help me with my uniform? And should the garter belt stay on?
[QUOTE]
*Originally posted by hardygrrl *
**
::takes sip of tea::
go ahead and take it off, and slide in here with me
Is there an opening for the behind-the-scenes prodigy - brilliant tactical analyst, can decipher encrypted messages at a glance, reads fluent ancient Arabic - who still desperately wants to be out where the action is, despite being entirely unsuited for fieldwork? We can have lots of comic relief scenes where the rest of you kick my ass at martial arts training sessions. Eventually, by coincidence I am thrown into combat, and am at first traumatized by my first direct encounter with the horrors of war. I spend several minutes staring at my hands in mute shock after being forced to make my first kill in self-defense. One of the rest of you - volunteers? - can come over and make a rousing speech to shake me out of it. In the end, I pull it together and come up with a brilliant and daring plan that snatches victory from the jaws of defeat and takes out Bin Laden’s right-hand man.
…so, am I in?
::Slides into hot tub with Nicklz::
So, my big bad soldier…
Three black Helicopters land in the centre of the camp, they are without markings and the windows are darkened.
Once the dust settles three Men step out of the centre 'copter. They are all dressed identically, in black tuxedoes and wrap around, mirrored, glasses. One of them flashes an ID card.
“Agent Gartog, United States Department of Secrets, I’m looking for a girl.” He pauses, glancing round the camp his eyes take in the collection of misfits, oddballs and hired muscle. “**Sterra **. She belongs to us.”
I want to be the Jean Gray-type character (especially if I can look like Famke Janssen!)
I’ll dress in conservative, but exquisitely fitted, dress suits with fabulous pumps (top right corner). My hair will be pulled back in a french-twist and I’m never seen with a hair out of place, rumpled, or freaking out. I am the epitomy of self-control. Compassionate, but mysterious and quiet.
I work mostly out of our HQ, assisting our Evil Scientists and Mute Assistants, and making sure that the administration runs smoothly. I know everyone’s secrets, but am a fortress of discretion. Everyone comes to me with their problems and I am their listening ear. However, my secret powers of telepathy also come in handy in the field and I’m frequently called upon to assist at interogations. My soft and low voice, accompanied by my lovely perfume and swaying fanny wrapped in its tight wool-flannel skirt, put the beaten and bloody prisoners at ease as I sift through their psyche for clues otherwise missed.
Is that okay? Can I play?
I’ll be happy to fulfill the Master of Disguise role… much like Face on the A-Team (just not quite as smarmy). A 6’5" Caucasian who is able to disguise himself as a 4’6" crippled Afghan so as to slip into the enemy stronghold unnoticed. (Or other disguises, in case that one doesn’t work too well.) And when my cover is blown by some beautiful native girl, I will just have to seduce her by giving her the Boyish Grin of Charm™ so she will defect to our side and help us win the battle.
Oh yeah, and I’m surprisingly good with weapons for the covert type. When the battle begins, I will pull a weapon out from my disguise that couldn’t POSSIBLY have fit in there (say an AR-15 with underslung grenade launcher) and amaze my foes with my ability to pick them off with casual elegance.
So am I hired?