I also enjoy the more detailed posts. This whole thread has been a heroic effort on your part, CG, and I have really enjoyed it so far. I can’t believe we’re actually getting towards the end of the run!
Well, heck, I will see if I can beef it back up - I just didn’t want to be redundant, plus it left extra room for me to note riffs…
Just note whatever you feel like noting. There isn’t a cap on the number of words you’re allowed! The thread is supposed to be “ultimate!” 
Not sure that link takes you to season 8-10; at least, I couldn’t find them. But this link definitely works.
There’s a cap on how many I can write on a page of the notebook I’m using - and to how many I can stand to write before my hand gives out! 
Uzi: Belated danke.
You’re welcome. And thanks to CG starting this thread many a moon ago thus giving me the incentive to find my own copies of all the episodes (well most of them. I think I’m missing one or two).
MST3K 8.13 - Jack Frost
Long-form review returns! Boy, this is a lot tougher.
Intro : Michael Nelson IS - Lord of the Dance! Bobo and Observer are on their own as Pearl has not yet returned from dropping off the space children - they bring Mike down to mediate in an argument. Mike almost tricks the Observer into taking his place in the day’s experiment, but is switched back at the last minute.
Jack Frost. (Tom : “…could eat no … frost.”) The credits draw the usual fire. (Mike : “These names are all Russian for ‘Alan Smithee’.”) We first meet a peasant family - sort of analogous to Cinderella. Cranky stepmother, her spoiled real daughter, he browbeaten husband, and the demure Nastenka. The real daughter is lambasted by the boys, taking particular note of her resemblance to various celebrities. (Mike : “Danny Bonaduce IS … Sleeping Beauty.”) Nastenka is threatened with a de-braiding if she doesn’t finish knitting a sock by morning. (Mike : “So the first plot point involves knitting socks - I think we’re in for quite a ride, guys.”) She talks the sun into slowing down, so she’s finished the last sock by the time the Rooster crows. ( Crow : “This is a test of the Emergency Broadcast Chicken.”)
We’re then introduced to the hero of our piece, Ivan. He’s vain, arrogant, and dismisses his mother’s advice as he wanders from home to make his way in the world. (Mike : “He has June Allyson hair.”) He promptly runs into a pack of REALLY scruffy bandits. (Tom : “Damn. Hobbits.”) Ivan gives into their demands for his money - while they’re distracted, he picks up their weapons and hurls them into orbit. Yeah. (Tom : “I think he’s mnissed the point of juggling.” Crow, as Bandit : “You didn’t tell us you were mythical!”) The bandits, despondent, leave Ivan be and he wanders on - bumping into oddball mystical character #1, Father Mushroom. Tom Bombadil is aptly compared. Father Mushroom challenges Ivan to a game of hide and seek, and uses his powers of invisibility to win. (Mike : “Frodo gets drunk and screws with his neighbors.”) For being somewhat of a good sport about losing, Ivan gets the bow and arrows he was promised, but forgets to thank Father Mushroom, leading him toward a well-deserved humbling. Instructed to throw a feather into the air to find his destiny, he does so, and is lead to Nastenka. (Crow as Sulu : “There’s a feathercraft approaching, captain.”) He spots he as she’s singing enchantingly, carrying two water pails down to the river. (Crow : “She’s retaining a lot of water.” - Crow gets a couple of HORRIBLE puns in this episode.)
Host Segment One : Crow wants to explore the themes of the movie a little more, so he uses Mike’s credit card to hire a lecturer - Yakov Smirnov. That goes about as well as can be expected.
Nastenka’s been sent by the wicked stepmother to water an old stump until flowers bloom - surprisingly, there’s no love at first sight, as she finds Ivan to be a bit of a braggart. He tries to shoot a bear to prove his prowess, so she up-ends one of her buckets on his head - when he removes it, he finds he’s been cursed with the head of a bear! Ivan blames her as a witch, natch, and scurries off. Scattered amidst this is an amusing scene with a couple of peasant girls spotting cute bear cubs making off with giant mushrooms - it’s utterly adorable, but after they (apparently) watch the scene for several minutes, they scream in terror quite inappropriately and run off. (Mike : “Delayed reaction syndrome.”) Ivan learns he must be good to break the curse, but he isn’t able to get the hang of it right away. Meanwhile, Nastenka is abused and humiliated by her stepmother in an effort to disguise her beauty so that the rotten real-daughter’s appointment with a matchmaker will go smoothly. Ivan finds and old blind lady in the woods, and carries her and her load of sticks home.
Host Segment Two : Crow’s a bear. Apparently. Bob and Observer make an uneasy peace, and find some common ground. Crow eats half of Tom, and buries him, in an effort to prove his beariness.
Real-daughter’s incompetence is exposed, and Nastenka’s efforts to save her stepsister from a pond end up revealing her real beauty and ruining the other’s chances with the matchmaker. Ivan spot’s the old lady’s walking stick, and struck by sympathy he decides to return it to her - apparently, just pondering a real good deed is enough, and the curse is broken. Nastenka’s father is ordered to take her to the woods and abandon her and he starts to, but decides to turn back. She doesn’t want her father to be beaten, though, so she hops off the sleigh and he returns home alone. (Geez, a lot of stuff happens in this movie!) Ivan’s back to his handsome self (Tom : “Val Kilmer IS… Prince Valiant.”) and he’s out looking for Nastenka. Instead, he finds Baba Yaga’s hut. (Mike : “Big Bird got developed!”) Baba Yaga - Wacky mystical character #2. (Tom : “Al Lewis, survivalist.”) Hilarity ensues. No, really. Watch the episode. Baba finally tires of the conflict and animates trees to take care of Ivan. (Crow : “Quick! Give’em Dutch Elm disease.”) She tries to put Ivan in her oven, but he tricks her into showing him how to sit on a shovel. Really. Once she’s in the oven, he chucks the trees out the door, and they scurry, to the tune of the Benny Hill music provided by Mike and the Bots. Once rescued from the oven, Baba reluctantly agrees to help Ivan.
We then meet Wacky magic character #3 - Jack Frost himself. He carries a magical staff which doubles as a flocking gun, and we see him demonstrate its powers on several unfrosted trees. (Mike, as Frost : “Eat lead, Spring!”) He finds Nastenka and manifests his sleigh to take her back to his house to get out of the cold. Meanwhile, Baba Yaga gives Ivan a cloak, and a magical pig-sled that will lead him to Nastenka - then when he’s left, sends out her cat to kill Nastenka before he finds her. Fickle faerie. The cat manages to trick Nastenka into touching Jack Frost’s scepter which he conveniently left behind as he was out on an errand. This supposedly freezes her eternally. Jack returns, and is pretty bummed.
Host Segment 3 : Crow’s made another effort to find an expert, and it’s even less relevant than Yakov Smirnov.
Baba Yaga rewards her cat and her pig-sled for work well done, but that’s premature - as Ivan arrives at Jack Frost’s house, he barely has time to get sad before she just wakes up. WTF? Ivan and Nastenka return to her parents’ home in triumphant fashion. (Mike : “Guess they got one of them quicky Icelandic marriages.”) Her sister is so jealous she has a breakdown - but the stepmother hits on the idea of abandoning her in the forest too, so Jack Frost will send HER home with a dowry and a fiancee. Unlike Nastenka, this one is sent with warm clothes and lots of food. (Crow : “It’s Mrs. Creosote!”) When Frost shows, she abuses, threatens, and manhandles him. It’s hilarious.
Our bandits return to the action - Baba Yaga, having discovered her failure, persuades them to ambush Ivan and his new fiancee. The bandits bounce into their hiding spots and prepare. (Mike : “Cirque de Soleil…”) The bandits get the upperhand briefly, but then Ivan’s holding his own against all of them - and then the cudgels he tossed into orbit months before come down square on the bandits’ skulls. (Crow : “Isn’t it ironic? Don’t you think?”) Good wins over evil and the wicked real daughter is sent home in humiliating fashion, and the father of the family finds a spine just in time for the marriage ceremony. (Tom : “Sgt. Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Wedding.”)
Finale : Tom is darling, adorable, cute. Observer and Bobo discuss great ape movies.
Leftover Riffs :
<Crow> : “So, the premise of this movie is that everyone is nuttier than all get-out.”
<Tom> : “Apparently, there’s no Finnish word for ‘subtle’.”
<Mike> : “It’s Prokofiev, and this time, he’s pissed.”
Seriously, this is one of my all-time favorites. The riffs are dense, and on-target. The movie itself, sans riffing, is actually amusing in a juvenile, cartoonish fashion, which certainly doesn’t hurt it’s watchability. In terms of sheer oddity, it’s right up there with Santa Claus as one of the strangest pictures they ever did. Plus, it’s a Russo-Finnish coproduction, like The Day the Earth Froze, The Sword and the Dragon, and The Magic Voyage of Sinbad.
Next : 8.14 Riding With Death
If it hadn’t been for the recent Staff Report on Alan Smithee, that would have gone right over my head. Thank you, Jim Beaver!
I, for one, would like to welcome back the expanded episode summaries.
My only concern is that it will slow up the end of the project considerably. Ah, well. Gotta give the people what they want…
It shouldn’t be too bad, as you only have two or three seasons left. (I’m still waiting for Hobgoblins.)
One thing I’ve been thinking about is compiling all our reviews and summeries ond doing a master thread. Obviously, I’d need your and the Mods’ permission to do this, and I’m too lazy to ask.
shudder
Rake fight. Enough said.
In anticipation of our imminent ride with death, I must remind you all that Abbey is quite a gal.
10-4 good buddies.
I also applaud the return of the longer summaries. I don’t want you to burn out on the project, but they’re a lot of fun.
You’re right about Jack Frost; it’s crazy and colorful enough on its own that it holds your interest better than a lot of MST movies, many of which lull me into a stupor after awhile with their poor lighting and sound. Lighting and sound: two very important elements of film.
CG , your summaries are as good as the ones written by Best Brains themselves. Sometimes better.
Like in Giant Spider Invasion.
Crow: “Dark? It’s not dark!” Rebane declared.
Servo: “Visuals? For a movie? Who needs 'em?”
A recurring riff, when the movie appears to have stopped dead and/or gone dark: “He…he…hello? Movie?”
Then there’s the “Filmed in Zapruder-vision!” riff they’ve made more than once.
Here we are again - sorry it’s been so long, but I need a big enough window of free time to input all this stuff. 
In MST news, Volume 1’s rights have been renegotiated, so it will be in print again; And the titles for Volume 11 have been announced.
MST3K 8.14 - Riding With Death
Well, a stinky piece of cheese from the 70’s - and recycled TV cheese at that. Riding With Death is cobbled together from two episodes of the 70’s TV failure ,The Gemini Man.
We open on the SOL as Mike is playing chef - one of those fancy open-grill show-chefs, in fact. After the first commercial break, they get a call on a WW2 Field Phone under the desk - it’s Pearl, and she’s under attack by killer robots. She wants air support, so Mike cooks up a little vinegar and baking soda bomb as a distraction - but predictably, he overdoes it, drtonating yet another planet. (Brings his tally for the season to 3.)
Ben Murphy plays agent Sam Casey, an operative of INTERSECT - given the power to turn invisible by an exploding satellite. The riffs start in the credits, and don’t let up. ( Mike : “Is there such a thing as ‘starring’ Ben Murphy? Isn’t it more honest just to say that most of the time, the camera is pointed at Ben Murphy?”) We kick things off in an Intersect computer center (Tom : “This computer has over 500 bytes of RAM.”) where someone is examining Casey’s background, including his law degree from Harvard ( Mike : “…under Operation : Admit the Dumb.”) so as to give us the exposition. (Crow : "Backstory database… ")
A Gavin McCloud-looking scientist approaches Intersect HQ with important documents - and brazen thungs try to take him down. Casey’s on the job, though, and helps out with his invisibility powers. A casual reference to the thugs as ‘turkeys’ sets off a chain of riffs from the guys that will persist throughout the episode. We learn that the scientist has been working on a fuel additive that drastically increases gas mileage - and as a consequence, oil cartels want him dead. Sam’s job is to get the scientist and his research materials safely to a Department of Energy office. Throughout this scene, Casey’s boss, Driscoll, is cleaning his glasses almost incessantly - and Tom provides a well-foleyed squeaking noise while Mike and Crow take turns putting words in his mouth. (Crow : “Still dirty!” Mike : “What is ON these things?”)
Sam gets to drive a big rig, and talk on his C.B., all the while unaware that the scientist’s additive is a fraud, and that he embezzled millions of dollars from the government. We meet Sam’s C.B. buddy, Buffalo Bill, a fellow truck driver who’ll prove pretty important later on.
Host Segment : Tom sings of the 70’s. The first century 70’s, that is. Oops.
Dr. “Gavin McCloud” Hale arranges an unscheduled stop of the rig, and manages to cleverly get himself off the truck, leaving the violently explosive fuel additive inside - along with Sam’s girlfriend/partner, Abby. We get an odd flashback in the middle of this sequence where Sam remembers the origin of his powers as he thinks fondly of Abby. Then he gets to save Buffalo Bill from hijackers! He spots the helicopter following him - Dr. Hale and crony, waiting for the truck to hit a big enough bump to set off the additive - and stops to check his shocks, checking in qith HQ, as he slowly pieces things together.
Driscoll checks on the ownership of the helicopter, then checks the name of the registered owner, which leads to one of my favorite lines of the episode. Driscoll mentions having just received a teletype from the RCMP… (Mike, as Driscoll/Dudley : “It says : ‘Nell!’”) Unfortunately, Sam’s brakes get sabotaged at the stop, and just as he figures out the deception, he’s faced with a set of hairpin turns in a semi with no brakes and a horribly volatile explosive in the back. Exciting? Maybe. (Crow : “Eh, this is the drum solo of movie scenes.”)
Host Segment : Tom has traded his normal body for a Trucker body.
Sam makes it through the curves, and gets on the straightaway - and his old buddy Buffalo Bill moves to help him out. Bill’s in front, see, and plans to let Sam catch up, so he can use his truck to slow down both vehicles. The dialogue in this section sets off an amusing exchange of riffs, starting with this one : (Crow : “‘Comin’ up on your mudflaps’ - people have such cute names for sex.”) Crow, predictably, ultimately takes it too far. (Crow : “My oft-complimented Peterbilt is rhythmically nudgin’ that sweet honeypot of yours.” Mike and Tom : “CROW!”)
Once the truck is stopped, Dr. Hale realizes the jig is up, and he starts shooting at the gas tank of the semi, from the helicopter. Sam gets the rig out of town and ditches, invisibly - Dr. Hale blows up the rig, and lands to make sure Sam is dead, resulting in Sam capturing him and his crony.
The bad guys caught, Driscoll laments the loss of the money, and Sam offers to use his powers to hit a bank back in town to reimburse the government, and turns invisible, much to Driscoll’s chagrin. Here we get a number of the movie’s awkward splices trying to tie the two episodes together. (Driscoll : “You’re as elusive as Robert Denby!” Mike : (chuckles) “Who?”) Denby, as we soon see, is the villain of the second half, who makes his living sabotaging government defense projects. Though Driscoll has been restrained from harassing Denby after botched attempts to investigate, he sends Sam up to the racetrack where Denby manages a racing team - including Buffalo Bill! The white jumpsuit somehow emphasizes his resemblance to Andy Kaufman. Sam uses his friendship with Bill to get on Denby’s team - meanwhile, from a room, somwhere, Abby watches all this on a video screen.
We are favored with a musical performance by Bill at Amateur night as a local bar ( Mike : “Well, he’s an amateur, I’ll give him that.”) and a barfight. Driscoll and team work on the evidentiary end of the case against Denby while Sam generally sort of snoops around.
Host Segment : Crow is Turkey Volume Guessing Man!
Bill and Sam have a falling out when Sam doesn’t want Bill to drive the racecar Sam knows is going to meet with disaster, but they patch things up after some thugs attack Sam in a parking lot. (Mike, as thug : “I’d like you to consider SCIENTOLOGY!”) Driscoll pins down the sabotage method, and Sam resolves to let Bill drive, but shadow him - sure enough, Bill has been drugged and passes out, so Invisible Sam takes over till the first pit stop, then pushes Bill out the window and drives off with the car to examine it. Bill, as he awakens, overhears a plan to remotely detonate the car as its being examined, so he warns Sam and Driscoll, and they get the car out of town before it can blow up.
Bill sings a little song of tribute to Sam. The end.
Finale : Mike and the Bots try to puzzle out Abby’s role in the second half; Pearl gets many medals for her valor.
Extra Riffs :
(re : one of the first thugs fighting invisible Sam)
Mike : “Peter Fonda IS Richard Petty IN the Marcel Marceau story.”
(re : inappropriate use of slow motion)
Mike : “Whoa, the acid kicked in…”
(re : tight pants)
Crow : “Operation : Cameltoe.”
(re : other tight pants)
Crow : “The rare MALE cameltoe…”
(re : Bill splaying)
Mike : “THERE’s your Buffalo shot.”
(in reference to : Giant Spider Invasion)
Tom : “Hey, look! A couple of Vaa-haaa-aaans!”
Thoughts : Mediocre episode. Some of the gags are beaten to death. Ben Murphy riffs, and ‘mellow 70’s’ riffs get a little tired. On the other hand, the ‘elusive Robert Denby’ riffs are gold just about every time, and the recurring gag that Crow does whenever Sam uses his wrist device to activate his powers is pretty solid.
I thought it was a great episode! So mellow out, you turkey!
The stinger shot of Jim Stafford getting excited was hilarious, especially with the riff, “I’m so excited, I pooped mah drawers!”