These are a few of my favourite flames... (just for a giggle)

Just had to do it… it’s probably more MPSIMSish than BBQish, but they are flames, after all…

Why you foul-mouthed baby-rapin’ ball-busting penis-envying slack-jawed hatchet-faced sack of doorknobs, you wouldn’t know a good blow job if it jumped up and bit you in the ass.
(Nickrz, “I Flame You All”)


Is that yoda-ese for small?
(Sly, “We Couldn’t Refrain From Asking… Is There Intelligent Life in Iceland?”)

::Add cool beatnik jazz music::
Jeanie, oh Jeanie!
Trolling Asswipe, you have my vote!
Jeanie, meanie Jeanie;
How do we know that you blow goats?
Your posts are bad!
You head is sad!
Did you aunt have sex with your dad?
Jeanie, brain-weenie;
You call our Opal a pig?
Give up the gig,
You foul-mouthed…Witch!
You could be a MacBitch!
(ExTank, “OpalCat”)

I wanted to throw in more, but I got tired of wading through crap.

Anyone else?

Veni, Vidi, Visa … I came, I saw, I bought.

Here’s a few of my faves:
And then there was

But this one had me on the floor when I composed it.

Whadda ya think?

Has Nickrz been by?
That was some of my best stuff!!

::wink, Nick. wink::

Oh…my…can’t type…laughing too hard…wouldn’t know a good blow job…air…I need air…

Cristi: I know, babe. I know. The first time I saw that flame, I laughed my ass off. I still laugh every time I think about it.

:::On my knees, repeatedly bowing to the god Nickrz::: “ohmballaballa, ohmballaballa”

I don’t think I was actually around for the other two, but I was just drifting in and out of different threads and came across them. The “Hugenot” one made me choke on my smoke, and the other one got me thinking about “So I Married an Axe Murderer”… I can’t look at it now without tossing in a couple of Mike Myers’ crow caws…

Veni, Vidi, Visa … I came, I saw, I bought.

A sentence of thirty days in the electric chair would be too good for you.You are a slithering, slimy, spineless glob of disgusting protoplasm and you should be jettisoned into the interior of the hottest furnace we can build for that purpose, so that no trace of your miserable existance remains.

Oh, and I would tell you to kiss my ass, but you probably couldn’t find it, you stupid motherfucker.

You are unique - Just like everyone else.

OK, well, the intention was to have people quote their favourite flames of past, but I suppose a new contribution never hurt.

Veni, Vidi, Visa … I came, I saw, I bought.

From the current thread “Since when are SDMB members qualified therapists?”

from Kelli:
I agree with Satan…hey you losers, stop talking about your personal life!
We should all talk about how we like to get fucked up the ass!

Give 'em hell Satan.

I have to say, I almost peed my pants over that one… Classic flame- short, sweet, and very too the point.

Run for the hills, folks! Or you’ll be up to your armpits in martians!

Oh! Oh! I have another…
From the current thread in the Pit called “Stoopid School System”

Hey!! I take a scientific calculator to work! (Well, I did before the downsizing, anyway.)
Get with the program. People who are technically literate (and that includes using math, little boy) and can communicate well are the only ones who will make a decent living later. Oh well…I suppose someone has to cook the french fries!

Prairie Rose
I LOVE IT!! Sort of along the lines of (from Caddyshack) "The world needs ditchdiggers,too!)

Run for the hills, folks! Or you’ll be up to your armpits in martians!

Chief Scott on “SDMB as a dating service”
So there’s a little non-confrontational, buddy-buddy, high-fivin’, "that’s a good post"ing, wink-winking, nudge-nudging, cybertit-flashing, touchy-feely, orgasm-counting, nipple-caressing, earlobe-nibbling, counter-thrusting, best-sexing, multiple-positioning flirting going on?
What a picture he paints with words!
C#3 – If you gotta back me up that way, I don’t need your two fuckin’ cents ever again!!!That was a good flame because he really meant it.

From the b vs b thread:
UMMM, how do you know that Brithael bites ?
Does he/she/it indulge in the behavior often ? If so has he/she/it had all it’s shots ??
I want to know in case he/she/it decides to bite me.


My disappointment is with Byzantine. In a battle of wits, she’s accepted the challenge of a Special Olympics contender. Shame on you, Byz. With all your attributes, it would seem you’d have something better to do than spar with one whose IQ hovers around room temperature.
C#3! You may have been just passed up as the most villified poster on the board. AS well it should be. At least you have convictions; Brithael just seems to be an idiot.
** Now that is a back handed compliment!**
Brithael is a skivvie skid sniffer

I could go on, but that is enough for now… :wink:

Sorry ChrisCTP, I miread the intention of the thread so I wrote a flame. I will read more carefully in the future.

I hate to waste this flame. Think it would be ok to copy it to another thread? I know just the place.

You are unique - Just like everyone else.

Go for it Wally… it’s your flame, you can fan it whenever you want.

Kellibelli: how satisfying to see a portion of one of MY flames in the thread!!

Veni, Vidi, Visa … I came, I saw, I bought.

I once referred to C#3 as “nothing but a mass of wrinkles and liverspots. A vast, quivering, Cthuluian mass of liverspots”.

Ah, those were the days…

<font face=“impact”>By the way, C#3 has only had one conviction in his life, and he beat that rap on appeal.</font>

We have met the enemy, and He is Us.–Walt Kelly

“Lick my piss flaps.”

  • Leslie I flame you all

Funny as hell, yet strangely arousing.

More from the peanut gallery:

“Okay, I’m gonna be nice just because I’m in the mood (let’s see how long this lasts). Love spell? Do you really want one or are you just being a fuck-knock?”
–Byzantine, “Love Spell”

“And if you’re contemplating suicide, let me know. I’ll do everything I can to help.”
–WallyM7 “Brithael V Byzantine”

"how ezy ix ths santecne to unnerstan how bt th won stl think tht correk speelng nd grrmmrr nda punkation rnt mprtnt imgn if evry sngl pst i wrt or evn evry postt on th bord was lke ths how exy wold itbe to reed evn won theard

WHAT YOU say yours isnt as bad as the pargraph abov prhaps this won is a litle closr to you postng but its stil hard too read isnt it just face it, if yu want peeple to unnerstand wat yu r writin yu need to make an effort to make yor writin readable wich means use corect spelling corect grammer corect punctution CORRECT CAPItlztion no mater how much yu think it doesnt mater, it stil does"
–Kat “Why Brithael Can’t Type”

sigh… It’s been a good week. I’m sure there are more to come.

Veni, Vidi, Visa … I came, I saw, I bought.

kellibelli- Take your mittens off man! (Dungeons and dragons PIT)

ellis555– and, finally, if that wasn’t a flame, does that mean that you’re just a confrontational asshole naturally? or were you just trying to work off a little anger after the sheep turned down your advances? (Oh, fuck you! PIT)

ChiefScott– I feel I’ve been brought up right. I also feel there’s nothing wrong with peeking in the window of a store displaying a sign reading “Free Blow Jobs”. (Oh, fuck you! PIT)

ChiefScott– Brithael’s new D&D character is a dung heap. Sure he stinks, but look at all the hit damage he absorbs! (Brithael V Byzantine PIT)

Brithael– How many old episodes of Lawrence Welk did you have to watch to get the material for those insults? (Brithael V Byzantine PIT)

Our friend the Chief
In his customary patter,
Accuses Brithael
Of ingesting fecal matter,
Brithael sputters, in fits and starts,
And claims he does it
To increase his smarts. (Brithael V Byzantine PIT)

These are just what I’ve seen tonight! God, I LOVE you folks!


Thank you, thank you. The “I Flame You All!” thread was my favorite on this whole board.

  • The Poster Formerly Known as Leslie

Leslie Irish Evans

BTW, I would have to hold up OpalCat’s “Cluemobile? You’ve got a pickup…” as a fine example of a subtle, yet consistent “dis”.

I’m not sure it qualifies as a flame, but it’s quality stuff nonetheless.

I read the “I Flame You All” thread earlier today…which lead me to read OpalCat’s “Page O’ Flames.” Both had me laughing so hard my husband thought he’d have to call 911.

In this age of technology, is there any possible hope of getting flaming into the Olympics? There’s some gold-medalists here.