**
And just how did you get ahold of those plans?
I firmly believe that there is a very good chance that if I ever have children, I’m going to drop them off at Duck Duck Goose’s house and pick them up when they’re about 18. Among other things, they’ll get very cool nicknames, not to mention a solid moral upbringing.
P.S. My other candidate for this was Biggirl, but she knows where I live, and could probably give the kids back before they’ve fully benefited from her tutelage.
I believe I need to smack Mnementh down for mentioning Upham who I have become terribly worried about lately since it has been too long since I have talked to him last. Very unusual.
NEWBIE SOLIDARITY!?!?!
We must put a stop to this before it gets out of hand!:eek:
I belive that Kricket is on ICQ right now…
I imagine Tuba wearing a bulky white space suit.
I believe that SPOOFE has a different spiky skull ring for every day of the week.
I believe that Arden Ranger is secretly the head of the NPTA.
I believe that in 1972, Bad News Baboon lead a crack commando unit that was sent to prison by a military court for a crime they didn’t commit. They promptly escaped from a maximum security stockade to the Los Angeles underground. Today, still wanted by the government, they survive as soldiers of fortune. If you have a problem, if no-one else can help, and if you can find them, maybe you can hire the SD-Team. Aside from that, I believe she practices a daily ritual every morning that includes smearing Skippy chunky peanut butter all over herself before she gets dressed.
I believe that Quadgop the Mercotan is actually the doctor from the Love Boat.
I believe Astroboy is right.
I believe Chef Troy must not love me anymore since he doesn’t message me as often.
awesome!
I was kicking Butt at age 1!
let that be a warning to you all!
and no, it’s Jiff.
I think Black Knight secretly weeps when he hears Knights in White Satin by the Moody Blues.
I think Iampunha really meant to be Impanema, as in the girl from.
I think Kricket really is a grasshopper in denial.
I believe **TheLoadedDog ** needs to be taken on a walk…and fast!
I believe Eve’s surname is Arden.
I can see her working at her big old typewriter, looking upward, mouth pursed (cutely), for inspiration, sometimes with a cat draped around her shoulders, like a fur stole.
Every now and then she’ll say “Smitty, will you submit these latest posts to the Straight Dope while I change the typewriter ribbon?” and her secretary (Thelma Ritter) will bustle in to send them onto the Teeming Millions.
I used to believe that [ul]TheLoadedDog was a skinny 20-year old,
Wooly was an unemployed anarchist living in a squat,
Kayeby was a plump accountant in her late thirties,
reprise was a short brunette with specs.[/ul] Then I discovered The Dopers Downunder Page. I stand corrected.
Redboss
I think Kricket really is a grasshopper in denial.
You sir are wrong!
That is how I got my nickname. I asked someone who was training me for a management possition how I was doing and in his best kung fu voice he told me that I was not yet a grasshopper but only a Kricket.
I’m not a sir, I swear!
(runs off crying)
(stops)
(sticks out tongue at Kricket)
(resumes playing hopscotch)
I believe Coldfire is a part of the British aristocracy, and that he’s sipping tea and having cucumber sandwiches while posting. When moderating, he’s sipping sherry.
I also believe Redboss is a witty and brilliant English professor, with graying hair and a corduroy jacket.
No, no, no. She’s wearing white alright, but not a space suit. More like an organza dress, with yards and yards of flowing fabric.
Arden Ranger is really a lumberjack. Must be the “Ranger” thing.
I believe that Geobabe is really Lara Croft.
I believe that Ukelele Ike is a messenger sent from a star system far from ours, for the sole purpose of cracking wise and looking fetching ( not felching, you little pervs ) in a sports jacket.
I believe that Sua Sponte is in reality Spencer Tracey.
I believe that ** Magdalene** may or may not be the reincarnated spirit of Mary Wollestonecraft Shelley. I lean towards the may.
I believe that AbbySthrnAccent used to be a Saturday Morning Kids Cartoon show hostess, until her tawdry past caught up with her and she had to flee to the badlands of Texas where long horns and long thumbs go hoof in hand.
I believe that Cartooniverse is in reality a thin-faced woman named Doreen MacCallister from Hastings-On-Hudson, New York. She spends her mornings doing the SDMB and her afternoons out rescuing stray opossum. At night she tats doilies and listens to old radio programs. She has 27 chromosomes.
I believe that Biggirl is in truth an agent of the CIA, but hell, everyone has to unwind somehow.( How do I know? She gazed into my eyes the last time I saw her face to face, and two things happened. I felt all tingly, and felt the uncontrollable urge to call my attorney )
I believe that Coldfire lives in Ohio, and this overseas shit is just to impress the rookies. <neener!!!>
I believe that we should be spelling believe like beleive, not like believe.
I believe that Cecil Adams is exactly whom he purports to be. So is his wife. So is Slug. So is Ed. And L’il Ed.
I believe that it’s better to burn out than to fade away.
Cartooniverse
I believe the sun should never set upon an argument
I believe we place our happiness in other people’s hands
I believe that junk food tastes so good because it’s bad for you
I believe your parents did the best job they knew how to do
I believe that beauty magazines promote low self esteem
I believe I’m loved when I’m completely by myself alone
I believe in Karma what you give is what you get returned
I believe you can’t appreciate real love until you’ve been burned
I believe the grass is no more greener on the other side
I believe you don’t know what you’ve got until you say goodbye
I believe you can’t control or choose your sexuality
I believe that trust is more important than monogamy
I believe your most attractive features are your heart and soul
I believe that family is worth more than money or gold
I believe the struggle for financial freedom is unfair
I believe the only ones who disagree are millionaires
I believe in Karma what you give is what you get returned
I believe you can’t appreciate real love until you’ve been burned
I believe the grass is no more greener on the other side
I believe you don’t know what you’ve got until you say goodbye
I believe forgiveness is the key to your unhappiness
I believe that wedded bliss negates the need to be undressed
I believe that God does not endorse TV evangelists
I believe in love surviving death into eternity
I believe in Karma what you give is what you get returned
I believe you can’t appreciate real love until you’ve been burned
I believe the grass is no more greener on the other side
I believe you don’t know what you’ve got until you say goodbye
You fool! You’ll ruin everything! And I was going to give you a management position, too…
Nordic Piano Technicians Association?
National Paper Trade Association?
National Pest Technicians Association?
I believe manhattan is really a big ol’ softy who wears fuzzy Godzilla houseshoes that roar when he walks and the cranky ol’ bastard routine is all an act.
I believe CrankyAsAnOldMan is none of those.
I believe that while Dire Wolf is definately something of a wolf he isn’t especially dire.
I believe Biggirl is someone I wish I knew in person.
I believe Persephone is The Chosen One. Her or jarbabyj. I can’t decide.
I believe Sir Rhosis is really Claudia Christian taunting me.
[Edited by Eutychus55 on 07-05-2001 at 07:47 PM]
[QUOTE]
*I believe that manhattan has never even been to the city, and actually resides in Plano, Texas.
QUOTE]
I believe you don’t live here. Plano, Texas actually is a city, and not a small one, either. 
Ziactrice
Someday I’m going to say something really insightful and witty, and everyone will remember my name. Until I do that, though, I’ll just keep bumbling about, muttering of my fear of spiders and calling out Jerry Lewis and Jerry Lee Lewis in the Pit.
I believe Arden Ranger is actually a Texas Ranger, old skool style. I can see her riding around in baggy khakis and chasing bad guys.
I believe LNO is a pizza-crazed Italian guy. (Oh…wait, that was my last boss, Lino…)
I believe Jester has multi-colored hair and shoes that jingle when he walks.
I believe Ukelele Ike is Don Ho’s illegitimate brother.
I believe matt_mcl will one day turn the frozen dairy world upside down by running amok and smacking customers with frozen dairy treats.
I believe Manservant Hecubus came up with that name just to make me giggle every time I read it.
I believe Coldfire has crazy hair that is colored to look like blue flames.
I believe I need some coffee.
I believe that…
CrankyAsAnOldMan is very cuddly. (Though the name always brings to mind Dennis the Menace’s neighbor.)
Tygr will never run out of female fans stalking him for a chance to be alone for just a few minutes.
LNO is loved even though he doesn’t know it. I’ll kill those spiders for you, dear.
GuanoLad runs about, singing songs about grass and karma and gets funny looks when he walks down the street wearing that awful mix of plaid and stripes.
Dantheman has a spot in his heart for younguns. (wink Now what could THAT mean?)
Catalyst needs to quit his lurking addiction, and that nasty thing with Mr. Bigglesworth. And that sooner or later, I’m going to seduce him and there’s nothing he can do about it. (Though I know he really wants me too, deep down inside.)
Ukelele Ike makes me laugh, just because. And that he’s a wonderful incubus…I mean…visitor…
Mr.Visible is in fact, not. At all, in the slightest, except on rainy Wednesday evenings. Am I right?
And I believe that I’m addicted to these stupid boards and when school starts back up it’s going to put me six feet under.
I believe that I need to get a life.
“I believe Eve’s surname is Arden.”
—Why, aren’t you an old sweetie! You have it pretty much on-target, except my secretary is the equally cranky Margaret Hamilton. I work for Walter Connelly in the City Room, and the office boy is Sterling Holloway.