CanvasShoes, thanks for the tip! Oh, I can make a lotta rings with all the unused pantyhose.
I often think I’ve lost a glass or water or cup of coffee, but that’s because I put it down in one room and get distracted in another. Then there were the few times when I set one down on a shelf in a closet while getting a towel or a video…I didn’t find those beverages again till the next day. :smack:
$2 trifectas, all by one horse. :mad:
$100 bills. If you find one, could you mail it back to me please?
Hair clips, ponytail bands, toenail clippers (thanks for the hint about the nail clippers Adoptamom , but I look wierd with my toes in my mouth 
guess I will just keep borrowing mr_smartini’s… I think he still has the ones he used in college.) Me? If I can pick it up I can lose it.
But on the bright side…when you lose a lot of things you get really good at finding them…I’m really good at that…I could Medal in it if it was an Olympic event.
CanvasShoes , I’m glad someone else does that with pantyhose. Trouser socks work well also when you can’t locate the mate. Yeah…I lose them too. Oh well.
I won’t accept my paycheck unless I’m going directly to the bank to deposit it. I’ve “lost” two paychecks and laundered two, so far.
I’ve also laundered cash a few times (“Thanks” to whomever designed U.S. paper money, as he has saved my butt on more than one occasion).
In other words…if it has value, then I will lose it.
See, this is why I’m very glad the places I’ve been working for all have a direct deposit system. Every time I get a check from someone, I misplace it. It always turns up, but it can take a while.
I’ve laundered Kleenex (unused) now and then.
His name is Bob and he’s living in Ohio now. 
Anyway, I’m always losing arguments with my boss. Why is that? It’s like he has power over me or something.
I’m tired and going to bed soon so I didn’t really read the other responses yet so I hope nobody beat me to this lame and corny joke I am about to make.
Things You Keep Losing
My mind 
My morals.
No, really.
Toothbrushes. I live in a two room apartment and brush my teeth whereever I am when I feel like it. Everytime I do a major housecleaning I find toothbrushes.
It’s weird and disgusting.
I make damn sure my keys go in the same place every time, no exceptions! There is hardly anything quite as frustrating and as maddening as having to find my keys when I need to go to work and I have no time to look for them. That said, I still slip every once in awhile and set them down in a place I am not accustomed to looking for them in.
I seem to lose computer files. I know I had to have saved something and can’t imagine why I would have deleted something so important, but yet I’ll have the damnedest time looking for it. I’ll go through the entire hard drive and then go through several CDs. While text files are relatively easy to search for, JPG’s and other images are harder since I won’t remember what I named it, and partial matches don’t yield the files as often as I would like them to.
Speaking of CDs, I’ve lost a few of these over the years along with cassette tapes from way back when.
I’m bad with losing pens, too. Most wind up behind my desk where they roll off or get knocked back there by one of my cats.
At least I’m not losing my hair… yet.
Well, I sure as heck am not loosing weight…but that’s another thread.
Those little rubber finger covers, used for quickly sorting papers. I can never keep track of them. I get a new box from the supply room and then lose all but one within the first day. That last one will usually last a week before I lose it.
I lose my contacts all the time. I gave up and started wearing glasses again because I never lose them.
I lose my brushes and deodorant all the time. Spoons too. I always buy my silverware in sets but I end up with more forks and knives than spoons.
Underwear. I never lose socks in the dryer. I lose underwear.
I also lose computer files but I can usually find them again.
My socks. I ALWAYS loose socks. I take them off and they are just…gone. I think I have an evil sock fairy stealing them.
My grip on reality, my temper and sobriety with increasing frequency.
Drivers License…
But only temporarily. Just long enough to have it replaced. Then the last one turns up. So, the next time I lose a license, I can use one of the old ones I found as ID (preferably expired) & not have to bring a huge stack of paperwork to get a new one.
I currently have 11 drivers licenses in a box under my bed. I can track how much my face has changed in the last 15 years.
My dad is in the habit of using a nice silver Cross pen. They’re about $20 for a set, or something. He got into the habit when he was the manager of a printing shop - people would constantly wander into his office and “borrow” one of his cheap Bics. We gave him the nice set for father’s day, and nobody dared to “borrow” them, so he always had a pen to use when he got back to his desk.
The lesson? If it’s cheap and easily replacable, it has a half-life of about 20 minutes. You’re gonna lose it.
I lose deoderant. I travel around a lot, and will forget to bring it, or leave it at my work apartment or some crap, and have to buy another one. I just moved and found all my stuff, and I now have 5 identical sticks of deoderant. Dammit.
I lose nail clippers. I have yet to find a good system to keep track of them. I’ll probably have to buy a set this week. Especially bad are baby-sized nail clippers, which are great at cutting hangnails, but are the size of a match stick. Those suckers probably get swallowed up by the carpet. :o
Finally (and this is embarrasing), I’ve lost 2 corporate American Express cards. This would be ok, except that I’ve found both later - in my wallet! I swear I search my wallet, but I don’t find them. I suspect they escape for awhile, then sneak back in later to piss me off. As an example to the new Amex card, I destroy the old one in front of his newly-delivered cousin. I’m sure the new one will try the same thing, though. Sneaky buggers.
But then you can always turn them into cleaning tools. Scrub stuff.
I always lose a small wad of hair when I wash it, especially during hot weather.
Cigarette lighters
Tweezers
Nail scissors
Expensive mascara
I’m pretty sure I know who “borrows” them, loses them, and then “borrows” the ones I bought to replace the last ones she “borrowed”.
I have taken to leaving an old mascara out as a decoy, and I sleep with the new one under my pillow. I would do the same with the other items, but I can’t find them.