Things you're expected to know/do, but don't...

Mundane Pointless Stuff I Must Share (MPSIMS)
#1

A companion to my “How much am I missing by not being an expert…” thread.

Things you’re expected to know/do, but don’t…

Them: “You live in Hawaii and don’t swim?”
Me: “Nope, and I don’t do the hula either”

Them: “You don’t change your own car oil?”
Me: “Nope, on my last truck, the oil filter was a pain to get to. Also, I don’t like the idea of having 2 tons over me while I lay on my back.”

Them: “You live near the stadium, you must go to a lot of football games”
Me: “Nope, have no interest in football and been there three times, only once for a football game. And that was only because it was my high school’s homecoming game.”

Them: “It’s the basketball, football, baseball, finals, playoffs, whatever. Aren’t you exciting and watching the games?”
Me: "Who’s playing?

Edit: Before you snark at me, while all the questions and responses are true, they’re not meant to sarcastic, just what came to mind at the moment.

#2

Them: You’ve lived in Delaware for 10 years? Have you had Apple scrapple?

Me: No. In fact I still am not really sure what it is and don’t really feel the need to know.

#3

I live in Nebraska. 95% of the state’s square miles are filled with corn and quadrupeds that eat corn. Corn is big business. “Detassaling” is something that many farm kids do to corn plants - for reasons that elude me. I think it has something to do with corn that either is or is not intended to be used for next years seed - maybe?

Also - The Huskers suck. Why do people care?

#4

For me it is football. My high school didn’t have a football team. My college didn’t have a football team. I’ve been to three football games in my life. When we watch the Super Bowl half the time we fast forward through the game to look at the ads. I never watch any other games. I know the basic rules, but anything beyond that I got from listening to John Madden when I heard him on KCBS during my commute.
Yeah, I’m a Communist.

#5

All about detasseling.

My siblings did that when they were teenagers. The Wikipedia page says manual detasseling can be done with workers riding on farm machinery or walking - but this was the 1970s, and they were kids, so they were walking. One of them came home one day and proudly proclaimed that they had completed seven rows. My parents were unimpressed, until it was pointed out that the rows were over a mile long.

For nearly twenty years, I’ve lived within a few miles of the world’s second-biggest stadium - but I’ve been to exactly one football game there, and that only because some friends who were ardent football fans were in town and had extra tickets.

#6

I’ve had to say to a lot of people “I’m a math major, not a calculator” as they toss a random string of numbers at me and want me to do something with them in my head, quickly (ie percent off sale, with another percent off that and some coupons they have etc). It’s often followed up with “I didn’t spend 4 years in college doing arithmetic” and in one case, that line was followed by “just like you’re an English major, I assume you didn’t spend 4 years memorizing the dictionary”.

#7

Speak Italian - wish I did! My dad was first generation Italian-American. My grandparents didn’t even teach their own kids let alone their grandkids. There are a handful words I know but I would never be able to carry on a conversation. I think my grandparents wanted so much to be American that they didn’t feel the need to teach their kids. They would converse amongst themselves in Italian all the time tho.

Watch sporting events - Neither my husband nor I watch any sports on TV or live, with the exception of our kids and now our grandkids hockey and soccer games. We will watch the MN State High School Hockey Tournament on TV if our local high school makes it. But NEVER professional football, baseball, basketball, hockey, etc. No interest at all. If I was forced, I’d watch an NHL game…maybe.

#8

I’m a man and I don’t watch porn.

#9

I lived next door to a motorsports facility and I am also a huge fan of auto racing. In the 19 years I lived there, I attended only one event and that was a NASCAR regional touring event. The track hosts an NHRA national event every year, couldn’t care less. There was also lots of weekend drag racing and events on the road course. During this time I traveled a couple times a year to oval tracks in the state of Washington, usually 2 to 3 hours from home.

#10

Them: You live in a converted railroad depot? You must be a railroad buff.
Me: No more than the next guy.

Them: You worked as a computer systems administrator. Will you have a look at my wonky computer?
Me: No.

On the other hand…

Them: You have a degree in printing? You probably know how to read upside down and backward!
Me: As a matter of fact, I do.

#11

Populations. Never had a good grip on those figures.

Vegas? 200k or 2M? I don’t know. Not even a guess. Just a bunch of people. Sacramento? No clue.

Unless its printed on the sign coming into town, I got no idea.

#12

I live in Quebec and I’m expected to be an expert on poutine. I don’t even like the stuff.

#13

We do not watch TV at home. We own a TV and have satellite television, but the last thing we watched was the Trump/Clinton presidential debate.

#14

Because I’m an ornithologist, people are always asking me about their sick canary or how to care for a baby bird they found. I may be able to give some general advice, but I’m not a veterinarian.

I lived in Colorado for 8 years. People were surprised that I had no interest in skiing. (I’ve been cross-country skiing a few times, but never downhill.)

Although I live in Panama and am two blocks from the ocean, I almost never go to the beach here just for the sake of going to the beach. The sun is too intense for sunbathing, and close to the city the slope of the beaches is so shallow you have to wade out pretty far before the water is deep enough to swim in.

#15

If you don’t mind me asking, does this mean you don’t watch things on Netflix, Hulu, or Amazon Prime or other streaming service?

The reason I ask is I had some friends who always said “We don’t watch TV” but it turns out that binge-watching shows on Netflix didn’t count as “watching TV” :slight_smile:

#16

Oh, I binge watch Netflix and Amazon all the time on my iPad. But “the TV” never gets turned on and we do not watch network TV shows.

#17

Being a librarian who has almost zero readers advisory* skills has caused me more than a little grief over the years. Fact of the matter is that I don’t read that much and what I do read is limited to a couple of authors I can discuss at some length, and two very narrow genres I can discuss generally. I’m much more of a “how much corn was grown in Nebraska in 1972?” kind of librarian.

  • the part of librarianship where someone comes in and says “I liked Dan Brown’s last book, what should I read next?”
#18

I grew up less than a half mile from the beach, so people always assumed I spent every free moment there.

Nope, I never cared for the beach growing up and hardly ever went.

The funny thing is, I actually enjoying going now that I live an hour and a half away from the nearest one.

#19

oh ok, thanks!

#20

*They: You’re English? Did you watch Princess {insert name}'s wedding?

Me: Princess who?*

There is a variant to this which involves the Duke and Dutchess of Sussex/Wessex/Essex or god knows where. Nope, no idea. There’s a decent chance that telling me their names wouldn’t help.

j