I’m sure you all remember me pitting that pimple that came up when I was with a girl that liked me. I was at that girl’s house today and once again she is angry with me but this time I do not think it is my fault. Let me also say that I don’t really know what our status is since we have never gone out without 500 people tagging along. I’m actually cool with that because the more, the merrier, but it does make it hard to get close to someone.
I was at her house and she and her dad got in a verbal fight because she had asked for some money and her dad said “I just gave you money at the beggining of the week and it’s spent?” from there it was a huge fight.
It was so awkward and her dad kept asking me if I went through money that fast and I was like “Yeh sure, sometimes” he answers “My daughter does it all the time”.
After that I figured I better leave so I told them and I left.
She leaves a message on my home answering machine, this is it word for word; “You obviously have no fucking idea what it means to have a fucking girlfriend, for you to stand there and not defend me, not say a word while my father lies about me not only that, agree with my father and make him right and then bail out like a bitch, (laughs and repeats the word bitch about 10 times) yeh I said bitch isn’t that nice…well it was nice knowing your little bitch ass. Don’t call me, I’ll call you.”
Yes my family heard it and I told them it must have been a wrong number.
I have played the tape to 2 friends who both agree she is a “psycho bitch”.
I just think she must have some kind of freaking chemical imbalance because one minute she is nice and the next minute I get this on my answering machine.
Now it’s time to move on to a different girl and I am so glad this wicked witch doesn’t go to my school.
Was she breaking up with me? I didn’t even know we were an official couple.
I still think she is pretty but definitely doesn’t seem to be worth my time.
She is a psycho attention whore. Run, run like the wiiiiiind.
I think if she calls you a bitch about counts …13 times, it’s pretty much over.
It was an awkward situation, I think you did the best you could. Sorry about this, I hope you find someone better. 
From the information in the OP (and there’s probably a fair amount neither we nor the OP knows), it seems to me that the girl got embarrassed and tried passing it on, so to speak. Got angry at the OP just because she wanted to vent and knew the answering machine wouldn’t yell back - and probably figured the OP had seen something he wasn’t likely to want to see again, so figured the chances of feeling some sort of ramification are slim to none.
I wouldn’t take it personally.
Even if this woman was sane, and she’s not…she is not your girlfriend.
There are times to stand up for your girlfriend, and times to stay out of it.
You stand up for her against every male but her father.
There are, of course, exceptions to this.
-
If her father is being physical abusive
-
If her father is being verbally abusive
Since he was being neither, you were right to stay out of it. If you get in the middle of an argument between your GF and her father, you always lose in the end.
My opinion, anyway.
And, of course, always stand up for yourself when someone is being verbally abusive to you! You don’t have to say anything back to her. Just exit smiling. You did just fine. She is bratty.
Fill your life with people who don’t have a long list of expectations for you to live up to.
You did the right thing by not getting involved in family trash talk. You showed class and have nothing to apologize for.
The sad fact is that this psycho probably will call you, making lame excuses about what she said, etc.
Don’t fall for it. Make a polite excuse and end the conver.
I hope you find someone cool soon.
You did a smart thing by leaving. It showed class. It wasn’t your fight. If you had taken either side, both of them would have turned on you for putting your nose in their business. Look at it this way … you don’t have to live with her. Her parents do, poor bastards.
If there’s one thing I’ve learned from my 27 (and counting) years on this planet is that you never get between a friend/girlfriend/boyfriend and their parents when there is an argument. The best case scenario is that you can be there after to listen and lend an ear.
You did right by being somewhat non-committal and then bailing out. What goes on between her and her father (assuming the lack of physical and mental abuse, as pointed out above) is their business, not yours.
I agree that you did the right thing not getting involved in a family squabble. Protecting a girlfriend from abuse is not the same as taking sides with her in a family argument.
If she’s going to scapegoat you for something this minor, I guarantee you a longer relationship would only expose you to an endless stream of the same kind of abuse.
Let some other poor sap be this girl’s punching bag. You have your own life to lead.
You never get involved in family arguments unless you’re a member of the family. Hell, a lot of the time you don’t get involved in family arguments then. If you are not directly affected by the issue, you don’t have a dog in that fight and should get the hell out of Dodge, especially if one of them is trying to drag you into it. (Poor form on Dad’s part, btw.) This is, of course, subject to all the standard disclaimers about abuse, physical danger, etc.
If my 17 year old daughter, and I were barking back and forth at each other about some matter that only concerned only the two of us, the last damn thing in the world I would want to hear is the boyfriend joining in.
The dad was wrong to engage you in that discussion. It was their private family business and her expectations for you to hop into her argument with her dad are insane. There are arguments you stay out of unless you have some massively important contribution. Money arguments between parents and children fall solidly in this category with a resounding thud. You were in an absolutely impossible situation and she’s too much of an emotional idiot to realize it. If she wants a boyfriend that will go toe to toe with her daddy, she’d better she shopping for apartments.
If she’s crazy, she’ll continue to believe that you are a Bitch^13.
If she’s not crazy, she’ll call you and apologize, tell you that she was way out of line, and will promise to try to hold her temper in check in the future.
HOWEVER, if, when she calls (if she calls), she’s sobbing and insisting that she “needs” you, and making insinuations that she’ll hurt herself without you, she’s REALLY crazy and you need to run, run, run Forrest run.
I would agree with the other posters, and add only that:
- you should break all ties; DON’T call her.
- in spite of your not having anything to do with her, know that she WILL call you. Psychos are like this.
- when she calls you, firmly make it clear that you are not interested in pursuing anything further with her, regardless of the sincerity of any apology she might offer.
- SPOOFE, I’ve always enjoyed your posts (how you doin’?). But yours leaves too much room for keeping on with this girl if she is sufficiently contrite, and I don’t agree with that.
The whole leaving a message like that on the family’s answering machine was a bit ballsy, and way over the line, IMHO.
I don’t know, psycho chicks tend to put out more. Just sayin’.
But then they kill your bunny.
Don’t call her. Please. If she calls you, tell her that you don’t want to talk to her.
Despite everyone telling him to run, I suspect START will probably forgive her and life will go on.
He did say she was pretty. And its very hard to say “no” to a pretty girl when she wants to be charming.
I’m gettin’ along all right.
I don’t want to try to encourage START to get back with this girl (hell, like he said, they weren’t even “together” to begin with). However, I know quite well that you CAN have isolated incidents of crazy flare-ups like this… sometimes it’s like a last gasp of childhood. I just don’t want to say “Stay away from her, no matter what!” based solely on the limited information I have.
But that’s just me. And I certainly don’t want to imply that other people are overly judgmental or anything for giving different advice.
I’m a firm believer that people can come back from almost anything. Maybe this fight will eventually serve as a catalyst to help her improve herself? Or maybe she’ll just continue to blame other people for her problems. I dunno.