A pool table
He’s a Haifa- lootin’ Newton-shooting son of a nun from Albuquerque part-time plow-boy Joe.
(the punch line is better than the joke)
And there they were, two little old men, repeating “After you”, “No, after you”.
“I’m not surprised…you’ve done nothing but complain since you got here!”
You’d have thought they’d have seen it.
(Sternvogel?? You know the String Joke! NOBODY knows the String Joke around here.)
The Pope replies, “Have you got an eraser?”
“Aw crap! I left my harp in Sam Clam’s Disco.”
“He’s Blind.”
“What makes you think I’m not wearing a tuxedo.” (PHC listeners will get that one.)
“Ear sticky.”
“Now this time, I want you to hold the golf club in your hands.”
“Hell, I just wish it was dark.”
“So there I was in the refrigerator, minding my own business…”
“That must be the nuts. They’re complimentary.”
“Most people just take the camel into town.”
“Rude Officer Ed knows rain, dear.”
is there a real joke that ends “Rectum? Damn near killed him!” or is there just the punch line?
“Give him back his $2.50 and tell him to go to hell!”
“Because when the inventor died, he took the recipe with him.”
“My agent was at my house?”
“That’s show biz for ya.”
“You can keep the duck.”
“So the doctor says, Well if that’s my thermometer, then where’s my pickle?”
“Catch that fart and paint it green!”
“A quarter pounder with cheese.”
“And the bartender says, Is this some kinda joke?”
“Make mine a Blood Light.”
Oi. Kids these days. What do they teach you in school? It should be:
“The sons of the squaw on the hippopotamus is equal to the sons of the squaws on the other two hides.”
Well, I think so but I’m not sure if I can fit another dinner roll up my but.
All right! Bring on that girl with the abscessed tooth!
Regards,
Shodan
The bee wares of the Izedom Arch seizer
“Who’s that guy with Bernie?”
Put him in a round room and tell him to sit in the corner.
I’ll tell you later.
They’ll go at night.
“I’m gonna show you just one more time.”
"'Cause I bet him that at 1:00 pm today I’d have the balls of the President of The Bank of Ontario in my hands. "
“Where are you going, oh boy-foot bear with teaks of Chan?”
“Well, the gun didn’t work, so I had to beat him to death with the chair.”
“Yeah, but Chunks is my dog’s name.”
OP checking in. There are some great punch lines here, so good that I think in a few days I will start a thread called “Put the joke you used in the punch line thread here”. I’m going to use my authority as OP to answer knock knock’s question now, though.
A guy brings his unconcious buddy to the emergency room.
The doctor asks “What happened?”. The guy says “Well, he was climbing a tree, he slipped and fell, and he landed on a fencepost that went right up his butthole”.
The doctor says “rectum”.
And the guy says…
I actually heard that one on the radio from a couple of disc jockeys who had heard the punch line but didn’t know the joke. I think a listener called in with the joke.
Now back to your regularly scheduled thread:
“I’m sick and tired of this constant bickering!”
A slipper!
See what happens when you don’t eat your vegitables!
What do you want for 10 dollars? Lobster?
When the lice get up for soda, leave the movie.