Tis the season to pit yourself.

I would like to pit myself for a variety of things, but not limited too:

[ul]
[li]For doping and farking most of my free time away instead of doing something like getting on the treadmill or something useful like saving the masterbating gay baby whales.[/li][li]For failure to win a big lottery jackpot. It is clear that I am not trying hard enough[/li][li]For not buying my son the Xbox and Playstation2 he wants to turn his brain to mush with. I am a bad, bad, evil mommy.[/li][li]For driving 35 south to go to a craft store to buy one thing that cost twenty five cents. I blew a quarter tank of gas to get there. And actually, I am really glad I did go. It was cool and I have a new need to go there. And often.[/li][li]I pit myself for being so weak around craft stores.[/li][li]I pit my banana bread recipe.[/li][li]I pit my coffee dependancy.[/li][li]I pit my bowling average of 106.[/li][li]I pit my sinuses.[/li][li] I pit my inability to become a member of SDMB Elite Inner Circle. How many goats do I have to felch?[/li][li] I pit my threadkilling skills and ability to start a thread that is so dull it could make wet concrete look like girl on girl Mexican Pron.[/li]
[/ul]

[list=a]
[li]spending too much time online[/li][li]screwing up like $5 worth of crayons last night[/li][li]letting my PHPBB get wormed[/li][li]not saving more for taxes[/li][li]not finding a way to have our purchase contract broken on the house so we could take the guy who offered full list price, cash[/li][li]not having the washer and dryer put in the garage instead of the pantry[/li][li]not getting the shower door widened in addition to handicapped rails[/li][li]ever buying furniture from someone other than my aunt[/li][li]not switching to Sprint cell phone service and running up 2000+ min at 45¢[/li][li]not kicking Bell South in the Nuts for managing to be incapable of phone service for a month[/li][/list]

All I can say is, if you’re not part of the “inner circle” Shirley, then I want no part of it.

You’re welcome to my circle, although it’s actually a rhombus, and one of the sides is starting to sag, and, well, it’s only me. :dubious:

Why Yes, I’d like whine with my birthday…

[ul]
[li]I’m 49 on Saturday[/li][li]Yeah, on Christmas Day[/li][li]Yeah, I’ve been ripped off on “combination” presents my entire life[/li][li]I just got bifocals, so I’m getting fucking old[/li][li]At least they’re progressive lenses[/li][li]Though I’m sick to my stomach because I haven’t gotten use to them yet[/li][li]I’m 34% body fat[/li][li]THIRTY-FOUR FUCKING PERCENT![/li][li]And I have a personal trainer certification[/li][li]So WTF am I doing at THIRTY-FOUR FUCKING PERCENT BODY FAT??[/li][li]Man, do I suck[/li][/ul]

I participated in the “good” or “naughty” thread, and wrote down a bunch of good things that I did there, so I should put the bad things here. So, here goes:

[ul]
[li] I pit myself for getting addicted to this SDMB and spending too much time here. I will definitely be better next year.[/li][li] I pit myself for not saving more money, when I could have.[/li][li] I pit myself for any and all impulse buys this year.[/li][li] I pit my damn allergies, damn them.[/li][li] I pit myself for not going to the regular doctor this year. [/li][li] I don’t *pit * myself for my coffee dependency, but mauybe, just maybe, I could tone it down a bit.[/ul][/li]
(There ya go!–Veb)

Ah, fuck. Forgot to close out the list. :smack: If there is a mod around who would take pity on me, could you make it so I wouldn’t have to be embarased?

Pit yourself for not using preview post!!

All of us other 99ers got the inside dope when Cecil stopped by our homes. Were you out?

:recites:
I pit myself for not using preview.

Damn!

Yeah, doing a search on 99ers reveals that we are, indeed, an elite inner circle. And I didn’t even know until I read this thread!

My crippling burden of humility.

I pit myself for being smart but lazy.

oh, oh, can I play?

I pit myself for:[ul][]Not getting enough exercise.[]Avoiding the dentist too much out of irrational fear.[]Being a bit of a waffling wimp when it comes to negotiating business contracts.[]Spending too much time on the computer when I should be doing housework and other mundane crap.[/ul]

[QUOTE=Shirley Ujest]
[ul]
[li]For not buying my son the Xbox and Playstation2 he wants to turn his brain to mush with. I am a bad, bad, evil mommy.[/ul][/li][/QUOTE]

Yes, yes you are. I can understand not buying him an X-box, but the PS2 is a necessity.

As for me:

[ul]
[li]I pit myself for spending too much money in September and October. I shouldn’t be dead broke for another month.[/li][li]While we’re at it, why didn’t I do a job search in September? Oh well, it’s almost a new year, and a new start, although I’ll still be broke[/li][li]I should never have ordered that stick of RAM. $180 for it. And now I have to send it BACK (another $30 for shipping) because it doesn’t work. Meanwhile, my computer is still too slow for my liking, and I’m broke.[/li][li]I was an idiot for opening that e-mail attachment. I knew there was probably a virus, and still opened it. D’oh![/li][li]Instead of a webcam and microphone, I should have asked for an external harddrive for Christmas. It would be more useful, and I’ll never afford one on my own at this rate.[/li][li]I didn’t study hard enough this semester. Now I have to work harder next semester to keep my GPA up.[/li][li]Did I mention I pit myself for allowing myself to become this broke? Especially when I’d love to go to Toronto or Boston this spring, and need money for that?[/li][/ul]

You have to be smart to be lazy.

I didn’t put up ONE single decoration.
My apt. looks like a frathouse of crack addicts used it as a crashpad, since I’ve been working practically non-stop for the last three weeks.
I haven’t taken my dog to the dogpark to play frisbee since it snowed. SHAME, SHAME on me for being such a wimp.
I spend WAY too much time on the dope, and ebay.
I have been terrible at remembering to drink enough water, which, with my ailment, leads to severe stomachaches, which are my OWN stupid fault.
Then, I compound the “not enough water” stomachache with eating chocolate, which I’m supposed to avoid, what a marroooon I am!

Thanks a bunch!

[ul]
[li]I pit myself for Surfing The Dope too much instead of reading the piles of books I have laying in my room.[/li][li]I pit the fact that after I eat my veggie-curry-beef soup, I have rancid farts.[/li][/ul]

Computer consoles don’t turn brains to mush, reality TV does. Guve him the console and he will watch less tv! Do it!
I put myself because I don’t know who else to blame for today seeming like the rest of yesterday. My last day before crimbo and itttt’'ssssss goooooiiiinnnnnngggggggggggggg tttttoooooooooooooooooooo ddddrrrraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaag

For not buying myself any dinner before work and then noedihnbqap9eurb

For not owning a kitten.

Oh and next to me is a large tin of terry’s chocolate orange segsations. I haven’t got a sweet tooth, just looking at the thing is making me naseus.