Dear Asshats,
What are you thinking? You break into cars in a shitty area. Are you expecting to get something of value? Here is a list of things I know you stole from my car and my neighbor’s car.
Collection of Black Metal CDs. These have value to thier owner and some others, but not a huge resale value in this neighborhood I imagine.
One wallet. You tried to use the credit card, but it was denied. Too Bad, so sad.
Punisher floor mats. I don’t get it either.
One Camelbak Pack. Of course it was missing the important part, thats still in my apartment. But I bet it looked neat all stuffed full like that.
One Vest. It was free. It was what made the Camelbak look so full.
One lip balm, inside the pack.
The headlight to my bike. You left the tail light though. I guess you didn’t need a full set.
My wife cell phone charger. It’s older than dirt, you have to wiggle it to get it to work. Good luck. It’s for a Nokia, just so you know.
And my favorite. The car adapter to my wife’s breast pump. It was in a bag that said “only for Medela Breast Pumps”. I’m sorry that your, or your SO’s pump came with no car adapter. I wish you hadn’t ruined the lock on my car for ours.
You are officially the worst thieves ever. Thanks for ruining my day off.