How are you fixed for popes?
Not bad, but before you close the door, you’re supposed to end with, “Good day, madam. I said, ‘Good day!’”.
I used to walk my Pit Bull past a school yard that was fenced in with an eight foot chain-link fence. One day, a normal looking fifty-something woman had her dogs inside the property (after school hours) and both large lab-mix dogs ran at me and my pet barking and snarling and biting at the fence. If the fence hadn’t run for several hundred feet both ways, it would have been a bad scene.
I told her, through the fence, that she should have her dogs on leashes (like my dog was), since they were prone to attacking people and other dogs. She clearly had no control over them. She replied, “Fuck you! Fuck you!” Last thing I expected from a conservatively dressed middle-aged woman. This was about fifteen years ago. Never underestimate your neighbors’ potential for crazy.
I agree. The OP wasn’t very tactful in his choice of words. Not quite sure what a “fucking nut job” means, but it might be construed as derogatory.
I’d tell her she’s a disgrace to womankind if she still has to hide behind her husband in the year 2014 over a word dispute. It’s shameful, actually.
Now she thinks you’re the dog crapper. She doesn’t strike me as being overly crazy for a neighborhood busybody. But even if she is it’s generally not a good idea to antagonize crazy people. Or act condescending towards them. You just paint a target on your forehead.
Taking longer than we thought.
Based on the story, the crazy fucking nut job is the only one who has committed a crime. File a police report.
I think it’s that thing where you make your partner wear a Russian soldier’s uniform, then put your balls in their mouth and smack them hard on the top of the head.
This thread giving anyone else déjà vu?
I shit in my own bags thank you!
I have the Coptic kind. He gets along well with my polar bears.
We don’t really care about bears who shit in the tundra, only the ones that shit in the woods.
Thanks. I got the picture, and it was very graphic! So, which one is the OP’s neighbor? The smacker or the smackie? Neither of them seems like a pleasant role.
I’ve trained our Labrador to shit on the neighbor’s lawn and then ring their doorbell, but she always runs away before punching their face in.
Thanks. Now I’ve got the tune to “Girl Watcher” going through my head.
Re: reciprocal shitting agreements
I have a couple of neighbors who have seen me walk by and offered to let me toss the filled bag into their trash. If I happen to have a filled bag when I pass their dumpsters, I do.
Similarly, I don’t care if anyone walking down the street puts a bag full of dog shit in my dumpster if it’s sitting on the street. That means it’s trash day, and if their bag o’shit is the first thing in my dumpster after it’s been emptied, that’s okay.
But some people get really cheesed off about this, so I wouldn’t dump my dog shit in just anybody’s dumpster, and I certainly wouldn’t leave it on anyone’s lawn, nor would I appreciate if their dog left it on my lawn.
A few times I have had people stick their heads out the door or window and thank me when I was picking up, which leads me to believe that a lot of people…don’t. (Well, I knew that. Those people are philistine clods.)
OP you should never speak to this woman again, but if you see her, can you get your dog to shit on command? And then pick it up? For bonus points catch it right in the bag. Then throw it at her.
Are you in a Stand Your Ground state?
I’d call the cops about the threat. It’s possible you’re the 20th person she’s threatened and the cops already have a folder with her name on it. If not, they can start one.
I think a framed picture of his dog shitting in her yard would be perfect!
IF the husband does come around to punch your face in, you have a houseful of crazy to deal with instead of just one crazy. I can’t see how this will ever end well.