It happened to me again tonight. I feel demoralized, defeated, and downtrodden.
I thought I had learned from the past, from my pain. I know I made some mistakes but I really believed that things had changed and I might be happy again one day.
I’m so miserable and stupid, unfit to live even, but too much of a coward to invoke a final solution.
I let her go, she slipped right through my fingers, but I can look in the mirror and see by my reflection that I am solely to blame.
I dropped my savior, in her virgin whites screaming out to me, yes goddamnit my savior, into oblivion in the waters below.
I dropped a whole roll of toilet paper into the toilet!
You’re supposed to hang it on that thing, you know, with the little roller, that allows you to tear off not enough sheets at a time. If you search around, you probably can find instructions on the Internet.
At least the Great TP Shortage seems to be mainly a thing of the past now. There’s other rolls at the store, man!
Now, if this had been a few months ago, I imagine you’d have no choice but to flee civilization in shame for such a wanton and wasteful act, living in the woods with the bears and the rabbits, and making do with leaves and moss.
Small consolation if he just dropped his only remaining roll. Although I suppose these are the moments when smart phones and Shipt really come in handy.
I once dropped the t.p. holder’s spindle into a toilet as it was flushing. I was very young and trying to do the right thing by replacing the roll. This taught me to close the lid before doing so.
That spindle disappeared faster than anything I’ve ever tried to flush on purpose.
