Tucker "I'm Not Gay" Carlson proves it

From here. Again, it’s Media Matters, ( you don’t really think Fox would run this, do you?)so all you Dubya fans put on your Truthiness goggles.

Tucker got hit on in a bathroom, and then had to go FIND SOMEOME to help him beat up the big mean gay guy!


And while I’m on the subject, where do all these GOP pundits get their affectation for bow ties? I saw some puffy white guy extolling the virtue and honor of Alberto Gonzales on hardball the other night, sporting the bow tie. Do they hand these out at Gay Repression Camp, or do they just there to keep the foreskins from slipping over their heads?

Too great a chance of someone taking the opportunity to hang them if they wear a regular necktie.

It’s a Black Muslim thing. You wouldn’t understand.

Speaking of truthiness, why are you representing what he said this way? He was assaulted. He was a high school kid. He went to get help. What does “gay” have to do with it? Do only straight people have to restrain themselves from putting their hands on others?

I don’t get it. What’s being Pitted here? Did you notice that he was talking about something that happened when he was in High School? Since we don’t know who was the bigger dude, it’s quite possible that it was a very smart thing to go and get someone to help. Now, he probably shouldn’t have assaulted the guy, but this was a long time ago, and he was just a kid.

They put it so euphemestically (“bothered”?), that I’m not really sure what happened. Did the guy engage in any unwanted touching to Carlson, or was it more like a subtle “tap”?

Yeah, I’m not seeing the worthiness of this pitting either. I have a great deal of contempt for Tucker, but if I had been in the same situation, and had a bigger, stronger friend within shouting distance, I probably would have done the exact same thing he did.

You might want to read the update. Tucker says the man physically assaulted him, so left and tracked down someone to help him, and they went back to the washroom and the man was still there, apparently waiting to assalt someone else. So they held him down and called the authorities.

Seems like the right thing to do. And BTW, I’ve never noticed a lot of gay bashing from Tucker. Can someone point to any instances where he’s made anti-gay remarks? Maybe he has, but I certainly don’t remember any.

Tucker’s more of a libertarian when it comes to gay rights, drugs, etc.

Can someone explain what MediaMatters is doing “exposing” this sort of stuff, anyway? From their Who We Are page:

If you take Carlson at his word, that’s pretty gross. If you believe his explanation later, it’s not as bad. I do have some trouble with the explanation - he says “I’ve been bothered in men’s rooms,” not ‘somebody assaulted me once,’ and somebody threatening him in the manner he described wouldn’t seem to have much connection to the Larry Craig story. But it was all a long time ago and I don’t expect further details, so I’ll let that go.

Since this is the Pit, I think he said a couple of other things that were fucking stupid:

The media blames the media in the media. ‘He’s a scumbag and I’ll criticize him, but he’s right that they had no right to try to do a story about him.’

And what the hell is THIS? Why do gay people need to “disavow” this stuff? (Why does everybody have to disavow everything bad to begin with? It’s just empty words. Is there no individual responsibility anymore?) Have gays ever marched or campaigned for the right to hit on guys in the crapper?

And then there’s the obligatory mention of Clinton. Nothing about the scandals from the last few years - just back to Clinton. How odd.

So bothered equals sexual assault (when Straight Tucker elaborates on the incident). I wonder if all of the times poor Tucker claims to have been bothered were attempted rapes (which if so you have to excuse the guy- Tucker looks so good in that bow tie and celebrity dancing he’s asking for trouble) or just the one that he boasts ended in violence and then elaborated upon (ah, by bothered I mean physical assault)?

And “gay rights groups ought to disavow that kind of crap”. I missed a couple of newsletters when I let my membership lapse. Do gay rights groups currently approve of sexual assaults on minors? Or does it sound like Tucker is making the incident a bit worse than he described it the night before in order to make his own actions seem more warranted?

Incidentally, in addition to being the least anti-gay right winger, Black People Love Tucker Carlson (particularly black Germans, who see him as the successor to Hasselhoff). And Jews and Puerto Ricans too, though they like Mr. T and Bruce Willis more.

I was curious about that–I went back and read it, and he did use the word “assault.” But he never said what happened, explicitly. An assault is one thing, but if we’re talking about a little tapping back and forth, it reeks of “OMG, teh gayz are after my hot nubile flesh!”

Yea, no real way to know, but that was my first thought as well. He offers the story as an example of gays hitting on people in the restrooms, and then later turns it into a sexual assault to make it look like his actions in response weren’t out of line.

Are you sure? I did a word search and couldn’t find the word assault in the original story (he only uses it in the Update). I’m pretty sure he just uses the word “bothered” in his original.

Ah, turns out I was reading it in the Update. Sorry.

Yes, in the original, the only word used to describe what the man making the advances was doing was “bothered.” It’s not at all clear what happened to Tucker Carlson in that bathroom.

Why did he have to go back? He got away. He was safe. When he went back, he wasn’t defending himself.

To help him do what?

Same story from a heterosexual point of view:

I’m sick of women flirting with me at when I’m at the gym. It’s ridiculous! ridiculous. I myself have been bothered by woman at the Gym.

What did you do?

Well she was bothering me so I…well I went back with a guy I knew and bashed her head against the wall.

I just realized that this is the lead story on MediaMatters. I’m so glad we have them as a watchdog group. Imagine if these conservative lies were just left in media unchallenged!!

Even if he had been assaulted, the proper response isn’t to go vigilante on the guy’s ass. Report it to the police, by all means, but don’t go outnumber someone and go postal–that’s not right either. This is probably why a lot of guys were being so subtle and undercover–because frightening things like this could happen.

Really, Tucker, way to change the story when you get busted on gay bashing.

A guy comes on to Tucker, he’s offended/scared/whatever, so he leaves the restroom and finds some friend to help him kick the guy’s ass. I call that gay bashing. Tucker’s update in the link is what I would call ass covering and attempting to make him look less like a gay-bashing asshole.

Just so we’re all clear here: when you beat someone up for being gay–that’s gay bashing. When you go back to find some guy who hit on you, and you and your friend(s) kick his ass for said hitting on you–that’s gay bashing.

IMO, Tucker Carlson is a gay-bashing, lying sack of shit. But I bet that’s not what his viewers take away from this. I’m sure they think that Tucker is a manly man for his violent response.