“24”
Take a shot each time:
-Any CTU employee complains about not having enough work to do
-Jack smiles
-Jack forgets to identify himself as a “federal agent”
“The Apprentice”
Take a shot each time:
-A boardroom encounter ends with Carolyn or George vocally disagreeing with Trump’s choice
Any others?
“Hannity and Colmes”
Take a shot everytime:
Ann Coulter, Hannity, or another severely Right polarized guest compliments a democrat without a trace of irony or sarcasm.
Alan Colmes tells Hannity to STFU and let the guest speak.
Hannity apologizes for interrupting a democrat.
Hannity sticks to actual verifiable facts in defending a point.
Chug the bottle everytime:
Hannity tells Ann Coulter to STFU.
Hannity admits to fantasizing about Al Franken spooning him on their honeymoon after DOMA is overturned and equal marriage is recognized.
Alan Colmes punches Sean Hannity in the face and yells: “IT’S ON!”
Hannity does a retraction at the beginning of a show that takes full personal responsibility for decieving the public in an attempt to foist a partisan lie.
:rolleyes:
Friends: When something funny is said. 
“Battlestar Galactica” (2005 version)
Chug every time there’s a moment of comic relief.
“Deadwood”
Sip every time there’s a line of dialogue you’re sure you entirely understood.
Whole bottle every time you see Calamity Jane sober
CSI (any version)
Chug when a DNA test takes longer than five minutes.
Chug when the cause of death is immediately obvious.
Chug whenever the killer gets exactly who was aiming for, as opposed to nailing an bystander or (oh, cruel irony!) the killer’s own brother/spouse/child/long-lost parent/etc.
My. A wittier riposte hassn’t been seen on here since the glorious days of Jersey Diamond and her post modern Algonquin Round Table.
I doff my cap to you.
Withnail & I
Take a drink anytime any character drinks a cup of tea, glass of water or can of coke.
Full House (assuming you aren’t already drunk enough to WANT to watch it): Take a swig whenever one of the Olsen twins has a scene in which they DON’T do something “cute”.
Gilmore Girls : Take a sip every time Lorelai says a sentence nice and slowly.
“The Al Franken Show”
Take a shot everytime:
Al says anything positive or nice about Rush Limbaugh, Sean Hannity, or Ann Coulter.
Al remains demure when calling Republicans on his perception of deception and simply says in a sedate voice: “I do believe they’ve posited an untruth.”
Al admits that the second time Bush actually did win.
Chug the bottle:
When Al’s co-host, Katherine Lanpher, instead of mock chastising Al tells him to get his hand out of her ass and stop assuming that she agrees with him on ANYTHING.
Franken admits to fantasizing about being in the middle of a To DeLay-Sean Hannity sandwich on their honeymoon after DOMA is overturned and equal marriage is recognized.
When his show is actually funny and not just an ongoing rant that thinks it’s not just a polar opposite of Sean Hannity and the O’Reilly Factor.
Rockford Files
Have a big gulp when Jim Rockford gets paid by someone who hires him.
Lost
Drink whenever you actually understand what the hell is going on…
Charmed
Whenever Phoebe is NOT about to fall out of her dress.
House
Whenever the docs do NOT nearly kill the patient by “treating the symptoms rather than the disease”.
Amusihng, but she as well as the other women on the show often wear shirts. Sure you can see their nipples through them, but they are covering skin.
“Lost”:
Take a shot (from now on) whenever Boone has a speaking line that’s not in a flashback.
Anime
Take a drink if/when/for…
-Every scene of clunky exposition.
-Every time love triumphs over all in the end.
-Whenever the heroes don’t freak out at the mention of nuclear weapons.
Yeah, I’m overgeneralizing. Nyah. 
Take a satisfying slug every time…
Meet The Press
Every time a guest says they won’t run for President and Tim Russert says “I’m glad we cleared that up” and moves on.
Jeopardy
When Alex asks a contestant “How in the hell did you even pass the qualifying test?”
Leno/Letterman/Conan/Kimmel et al
When the host doesn’t follow up on a joke about one party with a much lamer joke about the other one.
Local News
When you see something you agree is actual “news.”
Brevity is the soul of wit.
So, you have no soul.
My condolences.
Little House on the Prarie
Drink every time Michael Landon says, “Fuck”.