UncleBeer steals my women!

The BBQ Pit
1

I spend upward of seven, eight posts getting to know new board ladies and gradually getting them to various states of undress.

I cajole and wheedle myself into their hearts. I pamper them, satisfy their most secret desires. I stand ready to fulfill their every whim. Hell, I’ll even cook.

Then Beer clumps in, all ass and elbows, and absconds with these delightful ladies.

UncleBeer is a board whore! When will he have enough women? When will his previous conquests band together to inform newbies that he will use them as playthings for a post or two, then discarded like the cotton found in aspirin bottles?

There. I’m done. Lemme go clear the two place settings at the table, no one’s showing up for my filet mignon tonight…

2

See here now cheif. If you were all ass and elbows you would not HAVE to pamper and cajole, and satisfy secret desires.
Sounds to me you might have a bit of envy in you.

Oh if I could be a board whore like Unclebeer.
Osip

3

Sorry chief,
somehow I overlooked the misspelling of your name.
go ahead and say it. :wally

Osip

4

Did somebody mention filet mignon going to waste . How do you feel about beards Chief ?

5

Awww…Chief! You know I still love you! Now let me sit down…care to serve me dinner, hon?

6

ChiefScottHoney, have you forgotten that besides being a mod now UncleBeer was voted biggest male flirt ?

He does have a reputation to keep tarnished you know. It ain’t easy, being easy.

7

Bah hah hah haaaah ha. Ass and elbows, indeed. That awkward oaf act gets 'em every time. I assure you though, the act disappears when the lights go down and the clothes come off. Of course, at dinner, I know the napkin isn’t for blowing your nose, unlike you military snots.

8

MMMMmmmmmm… elbows!

9

Ya see, Chief? Maybe you should take a lesson from your betters. Now excuse me while I attend to this gorgeous young lady’s elbows.

10

That is so true. I should know. Uncle Beer . . .mrowr!

aw, shit. That was my out-loud voice again, huh? Sorry, Beer. I shouldn’t have said anything. . .

11

Andros, I have to ask, does Jophiel know about you and UncleBeer ? He might not like it.

12

That tramp ain’t got nothing on me, hon. Like they say,

“Once you go andros, you never go something that rhymes with andros.”

13

“Grydros”

14

Didn’t he get shot in a bar in Mos Eisley?

15

I’ve just reviewed all variations of Cosmo articles entitled, “What you want in a man!” and all Playboy articles entitled, “What she really wants!”

And I’m doing everything right! I’ve got the champagne, the strawberries, the attentive nurturing…
Hell, I’ll even turn off the football game so we can have discussions!

I think it’s his handle. So I’ll play his little game. Ladies, come a callin’ and meet ChiefScottBeer!

(If that doesn’t work, I’ve got UncleChiefScott held in reserve)

16

Awww, you two went and got hitched while I wasn’t looking. Next time, invite me to the reception. I sure hope you didn’t throw rice, you know what that does to the pigeons.

17

There’s your problem. If you ever turned off football at MY house I’d break your fingers!
Zette

18

CHIEF! I freaking said earlier in this thread I’d have dinner with you and succumb to your manly wiles. What am I, chopped liver???

19

Chief,I mentioned on Opal’s board that I would be your woman in FL! And you don’t even have to cook for me! Knowledge of dessert toppings would be a good thing, though.

20

Falcon – Would you find the time to attend dinner?
Michi – Sprinkles, jimmies, hot fudge, chopped nuts, cherries… Am I getting you hot?