Golly gee! tapu, I bet this NEVER OCCURRED TO YOU in sixteen years of being part of a lesbian couple raising a boy? Amiright? You never even THOUGHT about whether he’d need a male influence, did you? I bet your mind is like KAPOW right now.
Seriously, if ever there was an example of mansplaining, this has got to be it.
And LHand of Dness, you’re right: it never even occurred to us that Asa might benefit from positive male figures in his life. See, we parent mindlessly. Most gay couples do because that’s what we see a lot in the gen pop. Asa’s close relationship with his grandfather, his involvement with Cub Scouts and Boy Scouts, his frequent input from his uncles and others just… happened. We didn’t give a thought to setting all that up.
Thank you and the many others who get that. Those that don’t must picture us as dull-witted, unthinking, unmindful, clueless parents. I wonder where they developed their baseline opinion of parenting. Hm?
This is kind of how I think about privilege. You as a lesbian parent might have a pretty decent idea of what I as a straight parent go through and how I make decisions: you’re inundated every day with representations and conversations about what it’s like to be a straight parent, not to mention you probably grew up in a household with straight parents. You probably don’t need me to tell you much of anything about what it’s like to be a straight parent.
I, on the other hand, know three or four gay couples with kids, which means I know next to nothing about what it’s like to be a gay parent. It’s not really something I have to think about on a daily basis. Whatever occurs to me about the specific aspects of gay parenting has 100% already occurred to you, since you’ve thought about it so much more.
Hey, remember that time he came into your thread about positive, happy role models for people not in relationships and explained how to get in a relationship with a lame ass fishing analogy like everyone in that thread was 4… and talking about something complete different?