Some of you may remember my pathetically long thread about how I thought my boyfriend and I were going to break up and yadda yadda yadda and I was so depressed. No need to link to it, it embarrasses me.
Well, a lot of things have changed over the past month. He now lives 4 hours away, and since he’s been gone, I’ve had a lot of time to think. Throughout our entire relationship I hid the pain that he was causing me. I’m a very sensitive person and little things really get to me. Well since he’s been gone, my eyes have been opened. It’s not working, and it hasn’t been working for a while.
So today I confronted him. I told him everything, how I felt and how things weren’t as good as he may have thought. It was the hardest thing I’ve ever done. We cried together and hugged and talked through tears. But we did part on good terms, and I’m thankful for that. He is one of my best friends and always will be, and I will always love him. Maybe in the future things will be different, but for right now, I don’t feel like trying.
I just want to sit on my front porch and cry my eyes out. I know I’ll be okay, it just hurts right now. Today would mark a year and 7 months that we were together. Part of me is gone and I may never get it back, but it’s okay. You live and love and then you move on.
Have a good cry. You deserve it. I’m glad you found a way to open your eyes. That in itself makes this temporary pain worth it.
[sending you one pink rose]
There’s something in the water lately.
I know of 4 other individuals, plus myself who are all newly single as well.
The one consistent factor in all 5 separations that I am familiar with is that it is for the best and has been a while coming.
We can be strong together.
Definitely ok to cry. And I know it does no good for a stranger to tell you it all gets better, but it always has for me at least. And yes, it is possible to become friends again, but don’t try too soon. It can just hurt worse. But in a few months, hopefully you two can look back on this and realize it really was for the best, and you can help each other in your search for new love when you’re ready to do so.
Thanks for the good thoughts, everyone. It’s pretty hard on me right now but I know it was for the best. We were friends before we were together and I know we will always be friends. I cried my eyes out earlier and I do feel better. I’m just at that point right now where everything makes me feel like crying.
I’m sorry to hear that. It’ll do you good to cry… you’ve been hiding the pain for some time already, and now that it’s all out in the open… it’ll be cathartic.
Kind of like what happened to me… (the guy)
but I hadn’t caused her any pain… she was just cheating on me…
and my favorite part… She made me buy her dinner beforehand…
still it was the best thing that ever happened to me… It sucked for a good 2 months or so… (dated for 4 years)and took at about 6 months to be completely over it…
but you move on… and everything works out for the best…
it has been almost 3 years since then… and I am getting married next year to a wonderful girl next year… so sometimes you have to get through some pain to get to a better place…
Only one bit of advice: trust yourself. Some people get seduced into getting back together after a breakup, when they’re feeling lonely and sad and remembering the good times you had together. It’s almost always a mistake – you didn’t make this decision carelessly. You did the right thing for yourself. Just focus on grieving and healing and don’t second-guess your decision.
(This advice may be completely irrelevant, in which case disregard.)
{{{{{{{HUGS}}}}}}}}