Tucks claim to soothe, but they soothe the way an acid covered piece of steel wool on fire soothes.
I need to send the husband-unit to the drugstore in the morning for something, or I’m going to just take a chainsaw and cut my whole ass off. Anyone have a suggestion for something that ACTUALLY WORKS?
[for the purpose of this post, the word “WORKS” means “makes it stop hurting”]
Well cutting your ass off will at least provide a distraction of sorts.
If I get a sore throat, I gargle with aspirin suspension.
Maybe you could try…OMG…:eek:
Aside from a nice short cold bath and cleaning? I use the creams (i.e. Nupercaine currently), which don’t work instantly, but a few minutes later you realize you aren’t in such pain anymore. I refuse to subject myself to the humiliation of buying anything named something like “Anusol” (I am not making this up) so my choice often depends on an innocuous product name, you know? I don’t want some clerk internally snickering, “Heh. . . ‘Anusol’. . .”
Best stuff ever: Desitin ointment. Yes, the stuff that makes the babies stop crying. I also used Prep H suppositories (they work better than the ointment) when I was pregnant. Brand name only–accept no substitutes! The Desitin, too. Off-brands are not as effective. Use both at once if you need to.
good luck!
The main active ingredient in commerical products is, believe it or not, witchhazel. If you happen to have some (it’s a good topical antiseptic as well), you can try dabbing it on; it will soothe some, at least. I’ve tried it; never tried the desitin ointment, but that sounds plausible to me. 
Hope this helps
tarragon
Forget the pads - regular ordinary diaper wipes work really well for this purpose.
Prep H gel works well for me. YMMV, though. Mrs. Moto likes the old fashioned Prep H better.
Prep H.
But plain old Vasaline, in a pinch, if you can’t get anything else.
According to Mikie ENT Today
They actually have a whole lot of things to soothe hemmorhoids. However, I would suggest something along the line of Preparation H since as you can see above a toothbrush just won’t cut it.
Yeah I have generic witchazel pads, not name brand Tucks. It stings though. Badly.
I was thinking of getting Anusol, but didn’t know if it worked well or not. Desitin, eh? I might try that as well…
Try chilling the witchhazel as well, if you haven’t already. Like just above frozen. Worked for me, YMMV, of course.
I’ll second the Desitin. Takes away the sting and because it is absorbed through the skin, no butt cheeks slip sliding while you walk. Another trick I use involves a cheap latex glove. Put enough water in the four fingers to fill and hang inside the freezer. When the pain and itch becomes unbearable, grab an iced finger and some reading material and head to the rest room. Insert the finger, have a seat, and wait the 5 to 10 minutes for it to melt.
You don’t even want to know how I found this out (hint: it was dark): Crest toothpaste with floride. It burns a little at first but trust me, it is better than anything else.
I used to be bothered by hemoroids somewhat regularly, and I tried everything on the market and even some stuff I needed a prescription for, but nothing worked. This really works.
I am now open for the roughly 12,000 jokes that will bombard me.
You and SPOOFE…a marketer’s dream team.
These are not the 'roids you’re looking for.
These are not the 'roids we’re looking for.
Move along.
Move along.
But seriously folks, Prep H worked for me, but I don’t think I had it real bad.
tucks worked for me after 1st kid. just put the pad on and left it there for 1/2 an hour or so (does feel better when cool). plus, on the package, they claim to be good for vaginal uses as well.
slight hijack: what’s YMMV?
oh, and the frozen glove finger thing? freezer pops are good for, wait, no, maybe i should save that for a different thread…
Well, excuuuuuuuuuuuuse me! Anusol is what my doctor recommended, and it works for me! Desitin did nothing except clog me up. And the clerks at my local drugstore do not snicker. At least not to one’s face.
Solarcaine. Also useful for the occasional flame out due to overindulgence in hot and spicey food.
YMMV = your mileage may vary
Sort of like: What worked for me may or may not work for you.
FWIW, if I’m really diligent about keeping hydrated, the problem never arises, so to speak.
I’ve had very, very good results with A&D ointment, even if I DO smell faintly of codliver oil afterwards. While it doesn’t work instantaneously, it does offer me relief within a few minutes. I’ve found that it’s best to apply it after every movement, whether I feel the 'roids acting up or not. I clean up as usual, then I take a couple of squares of clean, fresh TP, fold them up, and put about 3/4 of an inch of the ointment on it. Then I apply with the toilet paper. This might not work for EVERYONE, but it works very well for me.
Keeping regular is a must. So is staying well hydrated.