(SO=significant other)
Mine:
non-smoker
non-pet owner
non-religious
no drugs or heavy alcohol consumption
no need to gamble a lot or often
Has to accept in me: eating meat, not fond of hanging out in bars, clubs, pool halls, etc. Not enchanted by long walks on the beach.
(bolding mine)
But, but… how can you not be enchanted by long walks on the beach? That’s like, a staple of romance!
I bet you don’t like flowers or expensive jewelry either! Hmmph!
You know, I used to think I had litmus tests, and then I met someone who fails several of them, yet I am still smitten.
Must be pH 4.0 to 5.5: a little tart, but neither caustic or acidic.
Isn’t “Likes long walks on the beach” secret code for “wants lots of kinky sex” ?
Reminds of the MadTV sketch with the chain smoking restaurant owner…and her personal ad that read “Brunette, smoker, doesn’t enjoy long walks…”
Hmm, it’s not quite as funny reading it as watching it.
Hmmm…put me down for long, multiple walks on a hot & sweaty beach… 
The only litmus test I have for a SO is non-smoking.
Hmm, I wouldn’t date a drug user or a heavy drinker. Those are my biggest two, after that I wouldn’t want to date a bi guy. I know it sounds bad, but I really have a personal squick factor with that. No kids. That’s about the only major ones, Oh! they must be male and gay. 
I was confused at first… thinking you were a woman. But now I think, “it’s bad enough being rejected by women for liking men, but now I may be rejected by a man for liking women! BLAH!”
Sorry. 
It’s really just a personal thing, I don’t limit my friends based on that factor or anything else…it just gives me a certain, I don’t know, Eww feeling. I don’t really want to get any more descriptive in this thread cause it will end up hijacking this to no end.
I like a girl who is a little base, not too acidic. Around a 4.5. Otherwise, she just isn’t as tasty and will give me heartburn
mmm…tasty, slighty-acidic girl…insert homer drool
um…well, you know, if oyu say you WON’T date someone with some qualities, you’ll end up with almost exactly that.
with that being said, i’m not into smokers. this parses off into alcoholics and drug users too.
outside of that, it’s a good old game of “give and take”.
and if we’re um…on that beach…“holding hands”, she’s doing a whole lot of taking.
Extremely wealthy
Very, very old
No living relatives
Female.
You pass - will you marry me?
Hopes like hell Foybal is a girl…
No smoking, little or no drinking, no religon, good with the recycling. I think no kids, but I may just be being weird. And a job I respect.
But there’s a shitload of stuff he’d have to put up with in me (no drinking, no god, a cat, a kid, a 60 hour a week job I love, etc.)
High geek / dork factor, good sense of humour, kindness and patience and gentleness. A nice smile. Good health, good hygiene, doesn’t creep me out–makes me feel safe being myself.
Outside of alcohol or maybe a little pot:
No drug users.
Has and can hold a job. (I don’t care what your job is. Just have one.)
Is responsible. (pays bill on time, takes care of her children, etc…)
Takes care of herself physically.
And thanks to my ex-wife:
Absolutely CAN NOT BE THE JELEOUS TYPE!!
So… Uh… Any of you female dopers pass my test feel free to drop me a line…
:dubious: <— idicates my sexy James Bond look. (not dubious)
I used to make very specific mental lists involving every detail down to favorite movies, books, and music. I’ve since learned that such lists are likely to exclude a lot of fantastic people. Now I just look for a general personality traits:
She’s around my age
She’s smart and reasonably well-read
She’s got some kind of creative/artistic streak
She’s caring, friendly, humble, and laid-back
She has a good sense of humor and can laugh at herself
She likes me for my personality, not my wallet
She’s open-minded, tolerant, and not overly religious
If I find her, and she likes me as much as like her, then I couldn’t care less whether she likes Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, eats spaghetti, or prefers cats over dogs. Hell, I’d even put up with a smoker. 
Female, with pulse. Willing to put up with me. That’s about it for requirements.
Now, the wish list is totally different (and moot; I got Mrs Polekitty and she’s just about right for me).
Female
Stubborn
Caring
Intelligent
Nice legs (…what can I say)