Sorry, but I’m in the ‘messing with his head’ camp. I was setup just like that when I was in jnr. high. I remember having a girl at age 15 try to set me up so she could walk away and say something mean, luckily my friend overheard her telling her friends earlier and thus I was informed. So when the coup-de-grace(sp?) came, I told her I wasn’t really interested in her and boy did she get pissed!!! Stormed off cuz I got her first.
We’ll never know for 100% what was happening in this situation, but we all know for certain that your son handled it the best way. Whether it was a setup or a slut he did the best and cut her off in a very decisive way.
This doesn’t mean that younger folk aren’t more aggressive, they are. They were when I was that age 18 years ago - I was forging permission slips for girls to go home early so they could have sex with their high school boyfriends.
I myself have a daughter, and the one thing I am going to make clear to her is that certain actions can lead to certain consequences. But I also want to instill in her a sense of ‘self’ that I feel will help her throughout her whole life. Her body is HERS. Not her boyfriend’s or husband’s and certainly not mine. I will try and help her figure out what is best for her, but I won’t stop her from using her body as she sees fit. I fully plan on allowing her to have her boyfriends stay the night at our house, if she so chooses. I’d rather she have sex at a tender young age in her home where a boundry-pushing boy gets thrown out on his ass if she screams “Dad!” vs. having sex at a tender young age in the backseat of a car parked out in the middle of nowhere with the same boundry-pushing boy. I feel that this will make her think about her decisions more, and quite possibly delay things until she does find a good boy worthy of her, ahem, attention.
To ignore history is to be doomed to repeat it. And I would say that ALL of the girls I had sex with from age 15 to 20 years old had parents who thought they were still virgins. I don’t want my daughter to get pregnant or an STD, so I’m not going to delude myself that if I say don’t have sex she won’t. Always beware the power of self-denial. Teach your kids to take care of themselves and they will, as demonstrated most effectively by Ivy’s son.
-Tcat