Inspired by several threads lately, including this one, and this one, I started wondering what sort of things that various of our Dopers might enjoy doing that they really should never, ever, ever mention in a Personal ad. (Okay - that was confusing - the two threads linked are threads # 438444, and 437844 - I had to triple check to make sure I was C&Ping two different links!)
First off some ground rules: You have to talk about something that you’d actually enjoy doing, no fair suggesting coprophagia, or other TMI level activities if you’d never do such things for pleasure, yourself. They also have to be activities that can be shared with a stranger, or near stranger, this is meant to eliminate answers such as masturbation.
To start things off on the right, and morbid, foot: I’ve found through bitter personal experience that suggesting a picnic and walking tour at Mount Hope usually disturbs people so much they leave skid marks. No matter that it’s one of the most peaceful, well-maintained, and quiestest parks I’d ever seen. And there’s always something else interesting to see in the next monument.
What other answers can we get from The Teeming Millions?
Don’t mention politics. Not on a first date, either. This leaves me in somewhat of a fix, considering that’s what I do with about 50% of my productive hours.
I’d disagree with part of what you said, matt_mcl; I think that mentioning politics in passing on the first date is fine. That’s mentioning in passing*, not debating, slagging your opponents, or ranting. Something like, “…and three years ago I was working for the Party X riding association…” is okay. But “Parties Y, Z, W, and especially V, are total losers! Only Party X has a brain in their heads.”
Things not to mention? Any bodily functions with a high TMI quotient. If you happen to have a bandage or a scar or whatever, and the other person asks about it, that’s okay though. It’s their choice. But don’t just launch into things like, “And after I got my sutures pulled…”
Perhaps not. But when the picture someone is using for their personal ad is them standing next to a bullet pocked monument from a Revolutionary War era graveyard, I don’t think it’s unreasonable to ask whether they might be a fellow cemetery geek.
“I enjoy a quiet day at the rifle range, honing my skills in the wasteland that is the 1000 meter kill and you’ll be safe with me because I always have my trusty 1911 at my side. Let’s kill something together.”
As one person announced on our first date*, and might well have said in her ad, “I used to be bulimic, but now I’m bipolar.”
*ETA: that would also be our only date.
Crap, that’s almost my entire ad. That only leaves vivisection and improvised munitions. Don’t tell me those are out, too?
For a woman (or a guy for that matter), never, ever mention the film Pretty Woman in anything but a contemptuous tone. Don’t drone on about your affection for Julia Roberts in it, don’t talk about how it changed your life, and definitely don’t place a picture of yourself dressed like the eponymous character. (Especially if you’re a guy. Well, I guess if that’s the sort of thing you’re into…whatever, not like I’m going to be checking out that ad, anyway.) In fact, I’d recommend staying as far away from the topic of Julia Roberts entirely. It’s best if you pretend you don’t know that the actress even exists, and feign ignorance if her name comes up in passing during an exchange of messages.
What? No, I don’t have any issues, thank you. Now let me tell you about my favorite film, Bring Me The Head of Alfredo Garcia…
Hmm, things that I think are good but shouldn’t mention (presuming I’d become single again)…
Portrait of a serial killer on my wall? Check. (It’s actually a neat but, yes, kinda disturbing work painted by my very talented brother-in-law. Extra points since it’s of Ed Gein and I hung it up right next to a deer head.) Major MMORPG addiction? Check. Favorite movie: Brazil? Check.
One of my first dates told me of her stomach stapling surgery.
Was it fair of me not to ask her out again? Especially considering the fact that, while she was very nice and actually was pretty attractive, she was dealing with some insecurities from the process, and was probably just getting back into dating?
Might not have been, but I had to be able to enjoy the second date as well, and this seemed to be a project too big to take on. I hope she learned to save the surgery story for a date a month or so into the relationship.
