What's the secret to keeping sex exciting and not just a routine to go through?

Ive my own ideas on this subject but as ever i’m always interested in the views of others!,let’s here what the rest of the world has to say on this one!!!

Please forgive me i’m English!

btw,that’s hear!,forgive my English ways! :slight_smile:

Please forgive me i’m English!

My guess is, if you have to ask such a question, you need to change partners.

Move to the United States.

t lion

" I Wonder What Happens When I push THIS Button? "

Hey!,i wasn’t referring to my sex life!..tis what i’m forever hearing!
My lover is all American and just the best!

Please forgive me i’m English!

Hmm your sex life pretty routine Toenails? Want me to send you some pics to perk things up?

“Only when he no longer knows what he is doing, does the painter do good
things.” --Edgar Degas


It’s simple and fun, if you like fun. Be exotic and different and experiment. I read a post where the lady says how she makes herself up differently from time to time and even uses black light makeup to make things more exciting. Dress up in something slinky and daring that accents your breasts and your hips, have him wear something you think looks hot on him, and, if you dare, check into a pornographic shop and get some interesting attachments he can wear.

Try different places. I know I love making love in motel rooms on the sea shore with a balcony overlooking the water and I had a wonderful time with a guy who took me camping on an island where we were the only ones there. It was a small island. Very small with lots of Australian pines and at night we ran around in the buff – he was kind of shy to begin with but he ‘got into it’ and we made love by the fire under the stars, out in the dark on a fragrant bed of soft Australian pine needles and down by the water. It was a huge turn-on for both of us.

Sometimes I have had a boyfriend show up with a mass of flowers – always a good thing for me – and hidden in the middle was a packet of those joke condoms that glow in the dark. We had some fun that night. (They do glow much better if you shine a lamp on then for a few minutes and in the dark, they are so wild going in and out.) I have burned incense, put on a lot of makeup, worn thigh highs both white and black colors, and doubled the foreplay.

I like rubbing him with scented oils and having him do the same for me, though he does tend to mainly concentrate after a while on my kootch. I know the hot coffee BJ and a little cute trick with hot mustard, but I have to be careful not to burn him. I’ve even kissed my fellow slowly and carefully all over, rubbed my breasts over him and had him do the same to me. Music, soft in the background helps a whole lot and I like the new Earth Tones or things like Native American flutes, those combinations of sea sounds and chimes or other instruments and things like that. Sometimes I’ve watched porn with a guy and we tried to copy what we saw or we both dressed up like the actors did.

Buy a sex book, like the good old fashioned Joy of Sex, books one and two. This man I know used to put his aftershave in his pubic hair for me and I just loved it because he used just a light touch and it made all the difference in the world. I don’t like making love in the water though, because a mans penis often acts like a pump and I’m not crazy about chlorinated water being packed up me. I know and like a lot of different positions and I learned some from men and some from books.

An interesting thing to do is to have sex, but stop before climax, then cuddle, relax, feel each other up and go back at it again. It prolongs the anticipation and enjoyment. A couple of times when I was on top of my man, I just stopped, plunked an ashtray on his chest and we smoked a couple of cigarettes, then went back at it. He thought that was fun because being in me kept him hard and mostly stimulated and it felt good to me also. I had one man body paint me, his idea, and it was great! I looked good too! A couple of times I shaved my pubes into the shape of a heart, leaving the bottom bald and that was wild.

Experiement. Be daring and have fun. Remember, what is considered by some as perverted is not for them, but if you enjoy it, then it is fine for you. Have you heard about the butt plug? Try it. If you like it up the back door, while he is doing that, have him insert a dildo in the front and it will drive you wild! Just be a bit careful, though, because it gets a little crowded in there that way and don’t use too hard of a dildo.

man, there are tons of things…

Erotic list:

tantric massage


scarves (better than handcuffs)

food of any kind (whipcream and fruits are the best)

showering together

bubble bath together

make love in an unusual place (a golf course, in the back of a car just like teens, the Victoria Secret dressing room ((my brother and his girlfriend did this hehe))

stripping for your man in the car

anything considered taboo

Sensual list:

Go on a walk in nature, far from other people – this has worked for me, right there in the forest is was exciting

Create a scavenger hunt for when he comes over – this could be in the list above – he has to find clues and pick up items for your love making session, and waalaa there you are either naked or in your sexiest teddy

Send little notes via email only he can decifer

Talk dirty to him while he’s at work (he wont be able to leave his desk for a while though)

Send him flowers…why not?

Start a food fight with him (never tried it but it sounds fun to me)
I have more, but that’s some of my list…any others?

Here’s a site I found that just cracked me up…on the other hand it may have some fun products < grin > If I had a credit card…

Oh, gollee, bugger me. Hey, why not read Anita’s post during sex? That’s sure to liven things up mate.

Post your pic Im sure the girls here be after ya to show you some new tricks. what the hey, you’re a handsome chap. pic at: http://www.fortunecity.com/marina/titanic/843/graphics/Rob.jpg

<img scr=“http://www.fortunecity.com/marina/titanic/843/graphics/Rob.jpg”>

You could also read Mark’s post. :wink:

Some drink at the fountain of knowledge…others just gargle.

He is also the man in my pic handy. I gotta be honest with ya tho…the man needs no lessons. =)

“Only when he no longer knows what he is doing, does the painter do good
things.” --Edgar Degas

It’s sort of like tea. Some people need a variety of flavors, some don’t.
Getting rid of bothersome responsibilities, such as kids, would leave more time and opportunity for experiment.

Try scented oils…warmed by your hands….a good massage is always a turn on. Especially if you can give it beside a roaring fire.

Look for erotic literature. Many bookstores like B.Dalton’s or Waldenbooks have erotica under the Fiction section. Look for anything by “Anonymous” . Many women are more stimulated by the sritten word. Also, Penthouse has books that are a compellation of letters that they have received for their magazine. Have her read some either out loud or to herself, while you caress her body.

Learn to pay attention to erogenous zones other than the Big 3. Especially after a few years of being with the same person, it’s easy to focus only on a few certain places. Kiss her whole body…let your tongue trail across her skin. Let her feel your hot breath on her body, the anticipation of feeling your lips will drive her wild. I like to use the term “Night of a Thousand Kiss’s” to describe this technique. Come up with terms like that, little saying that are silly, but evoke a mental image for her.

The Internet can also be a source for turn on’s. Look for true amateur sites…sometimes it can be exciting to see real people posing. Consider sending pics of you and her in. (with faces suitably blurred) Many women have a slight exhibitionist streak. There are also story sites out there, as well as online toys that you can look at. Sometimes window shopping can be arousing also.

Don’t be afraid to fantasize with your partner. Tell them the types of things that you secretly think about. This takes a level of trust that many can’t achieve, but it’s well worth the risk. I’ve found that by sharing the fantasy of doing things, the actual need to do them decreases. If the checkout woman at your local supermarket turns you on, share that with your partner. Have her whisper in your ear about some of the things you could do while you touch yourself. It’s important to stress that these scenario’s never have to actually happen, they are just to fantasize about.

I also recommend looking into sex toys. There are dozens of different things you can get to enhance your sexual pleasure. Aside from assorted dildo’s and vibrators, there are clamps, and light restraints. Gloves made of different material (silk, satin, leather) that you can wear while caressing her/him. Different oils, some of which will get warm when breathed on (those are fun, but be careful). Of course, there are porn videos, but sometimes this will cause your partner to collapse in helpless laughter. :slight_smile:

Most of all, be willing to try new things…weather it’s something you read about in a book, see in a movie, or hear from a friend. A favorite quote I used to have (Forgotten who said it) is that it’s easier to be a lover than a husband, for the simple reason that it’s easier to say pretty things from time to time than every day.
The same theory applies to the bedroom. Best of luck…let me know if you’d like some more suggestions.

Jesus, Atrael! How the hell am I supposed to get any work done now? :wink:

Some drink at the fountain of knowledge…others just gargle.

Oh boy, Atrael, warm oil next to a hot fire? haha, can you say ‘skin flambe!’

Ooooh Atrael… wanna wear a bow and be my present?

The thing about life is that if you can laugh at yourself and the mistakes you make, then you learn lessons from the things that cause the most pain

Oh my…okay, when’s that Norfolk Dopers meeting again??? Woohoo!

“Men are from Earth, women are from Earth. Deal with it.” - George Carlin

I would suggest. . . learn that routine can be fun, too. Cosmo magazine and advertising in general have spent the last thirty years trying to convince us all that unless sex is constantly revamped and made novel it is boring and drab. I think this destroys a lot of relationships. I mean, face it, after 25 years or so you are going to have tried everything three times–does that mean that the magic is over and it is time to move on? Advertising is constantly impling that everyone else is having wonderful, excitng sex and non-stop, mind-blowing orgasms, and that you can too if you book that cruise, buy that toy, buy this magazine, go to this therapist. . . I mean, if the sex is good it oughtn’t need constant spicing up, and I refuse to believe that middle age people and poor people can’t have rich, full, satisfying sex lives.