Typically, I order Black Russians; also fond of (in this order) cognac, vodka neat, vodka martinis, scotch, wine, and beer – very, very dark heavy beer, unless I’m pairing it with cuisine. Or if it’s really, really, hot, and I’m really really, thirsty, in which case a lager or even one of those thin pale watery American things actually hits the spot.
Yep. Beer and meat. Yessir.
Well, if I’m on a veranda in the Big Easy it’ll probably be a Hand Grenade or a Hurricane, but if you want my usual thats’ easy. Absolut Citron and Soda, twist of lemon. Things tend to get out of hand.
A pint of Guinness would be my first choice, Sam Smiths nut brown ale my second.
Oh, I forgot the lime. That too.
For the situation described by the OP, there’s only one option - Hoegaarden.
Beer is (on an extremely basic level) just non-distilled Jack Daniels, with some ingredient variations depending on the kind of beer.
If there’s no good beer (by my definition) around, I drink vodka sours.
Its an easy choice for me.
Either beer -or-
Wild Turkey 101
Sprite
Splash of grenadine
Cherry
Don’t know what it is called, but we started drinking them in college because… uh… that is what we had laying around. We always called it “That Turkey Deal.”
It is really pretty damn good.
Bushmills/rocks.
Hornitos w/ a Mirror Pond back.
Water with a slice of lemon.
Upon occasion, Diet Coke with a slice of lemon.
I’m a draught beer kinda guy, but if I order a cocktail, it’s usually a Bloody Mary-- Extra hot sauce, a celery stalk, a pickle spear, two olives, and a wedge of lime; celery salt too, please. Liquid Lunch. 
Beer–either an import or a microbrewery type…
A Corona with lime is always good.
Modified amaretto sour - amaretto, orange juice, sour mix, grenadine, cherries.
If I don’t want to explain what I want, I order a rasberry cosmopolitan.
If I care to explain what I want:
Citrus vodka, a splash of chambord and & squeeze of lime, shaken and served straight up.
Failing that, any good microbrew is fine (if I’m pacing myself)
Anything made with burbon is also good in my book.
Bartender, I’ll have a manhattan please, up.
::dimples::
Jim Beam and Diet Coke in a bar.
Jim Beam and Coke Zero at home.
I also drink, less frequently, vodka and Diet V8 Splash Tropical.
Various microbrews.
Bloody Marys.
And sometimes Bailey’s and coffee. Mmm.
Most often beer. My current favorite is Yeungling. Unless I’m at a Mexican restaurant. Then I have a Tecate.
If I’m having a mixed drink, I like a Comfort Sour or, occasionally, Jack & Ginger.
At home, I drink Lambrusco – you know, Riunite Lambrusco in the screw-top bottle? I am a wine-wienie, I admit it.
Lime and soda
Lemon, lime and bitters
Ginnan
Gin Martini
Bloody Mary
otherwise: any kinda beer I’m in the mood for. That can be MGD on one end and Salvator Doppelboch on the other. As I’ve said before, I’m a Full-Spectrum beerslut.
If I’m tired - a Jagerbomb or Vodkabomb
If I’m hungry - beer and tomato juice with pepper on top.
If I’m feeling poorly - Sprite with a lime
If I’m yearning to break free - an occasional Chocolate Cake or a Washington Apple.