You’ve been kidnapped. 30 mins later the kidnapper dumps you on the street because you won’t stop talking about what?
What’s the most interesting car you saw today?
And then I saw a 2014 Honda Accord with custom rims, and then I saw a 2019 RAV-4, but get this, it was painted red instead of a neutral color, and then I saw. . .
When a cop is doing a George Floyd in front of you, what should be the appropriate response?
Topic Playlist!
For such occasions you should always have a music player with the appropriate topic playlist ready to go. “I Fought The Law”, “Police On My Back” and “Caught By The Fuzz” are natural choices. Add some playful rap tunes if you’re feeling lucky.
What would you do if you had the Flash’s powers for a week?
Going to Maui
Medical Question - Complete Inability to Sleep
Dressed like a pimp
It might help if you at least took off the platform heels.
Turn your Poop Blue!
Open up the windows in the MMP!
It smells like Blue Poop in here!
Scam call this morning
Hitler’s alligator dies in Moscow
I’ll never forgive myself for not wiring $5000 to the vet. 
When your pets attempt murder
Abubakar Shekau, leader of Boko Haram, is dead
That’s what happens when you’re stingy with treats.
Why are you always late?
The cicadas are here!
Goddamnit, I thought they weren’t coming until 2038. I’ll have to stop off to buy snacks.
Why are you always late?
EV spotting
I need to spot at least one a day, which made me extremely late in the 90s.
The cicadas are here!
I believe I have discovered the worst “food” item in existence
Nonsense. When broiled, the crunch makes them delectable.
My hand feels like a balloon
NOVA program on Hindenburg explosion - Harbor Freight connection
Oh, the digitality!
I wish to live off the government dole. Tell me how
Things you’ve been surprised you’ve had to explain at work
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Why are you always late?
People of Zoom
What’s the cheapest mainstay of your diet?
What is poutine?
You’ve been kidnapped. 30 mins later the kidnapper dumps you on the street because you won’t stop talking about what?
My new apartment has a high pitched noise
“What do you think it is? It sounds like eeeeeeeeeeeeueuue eeeueuueueueueuueeeueeueueueueueueuueueueeeueueueueueeeeueue
eeeeeueueeueeueeeueeueeueeeueeeeueeueueeeeeueeeeueeee”
The cicadas are here!
Noise mysteries you’ve solved
Dramatic increase in hair growth
Another thing to worry about: your meibomian glands
Ever get the feeling you’re sharing a bit too much on dating sites?
Ever been adored by an animal whose affections you don’t reciprocate?
The cicadas are here!
Again with the annoying commercials
Vintage commercials
Things where prices have skyrocketed during the pandemic
What conspiracy theory about the Pandemic do you think is plausible?
Extraterrestrials plotting with Bill Gates to corral the world supply of vegemite. 
Alternatives to “Atlas Shrugged”
The Home Bathroom Sink Dilemma
In this little known but compelling Ayn Rand novel, the Revernon Corporation develops a revolutionary plumbing system that runs on Qi energy, but the federal government nationalizes it. A secretive force called “The Men Of The Pipes” stages hit-and-run raids on water treatment plants and a struggle for the soul of America ensues.