Oh crap, I forgot about in-laws. I thought I was safe. After trying to prevent, and then break up my marriage, my in-laws have been quiet the past few years…TOO QUIET!
Are you having trouble dealing with that from her?
Not really. I just say “Ok, Ok”, call my mom once a month, and roll my eyes the rest of the time and bitch to my SO.
See, my mom really is ill. She has bone cancer. But she hasn’t told me and doesn’t want anyone to tell me (I found out from my brother) so I can’t bring it up.
I figure I’m doing my good deed by calling her monthly. She doesn’t really even deserve that.
Thanks for asking.
Glad to hear you’re handling it so well. I’m impressed you’re reaching out even that much to your mother.
And of course, you’re welcome. I’m glad to see you posting again, too.
I’m sorry to hear about your mother’s illness. Hey, if I can offer sympathy on Novak’s cancer…
As an aside: WTF is up with the “don’t tell so-and-so about my life-ending illness” trope? I just cannot get that idiocy. The only purpose I can see to it is to set up some kind of nuclear-powered guilt trip. :dubious:
In that case, my 6 yr old nephew, Steven. To him, I’m just that guy with the big, scary dog, that tells him off when he’s giving cheek to my mum. 
He’d trade me in for someone more useful in a New York minute.
My cousin C. has gotten very flaky in recent years.
Also, my younger niece is completely self-absorbed, demanding, and just plain difficult to live with.
Cousin takes first place in this dubious hierarchy.
Hmm…12 closest friends/family?
Oh, that would be my ex-bf, Nicole, because…oh wait! she recently did…that’s why she’s an ex. I was wanting to still be friends with her until I read some of her emails to my husband.
Well, it can’t be Annikin, he’s too busy restoring balance to the Force.
It musty be whichever one of them is my auto mechanic.:mad:
My mom would sell me down the river and her only concern would be if it would make her look bad in other peoples’ eyes.
Answer assuming that you’re serious:
That is fucked up, amigo. Why is this person still in your life?
Answer assuming you’re being a smart-ass:
I do not understand why you keep referring to me as Jeff. You’ll pay for that.
When my mom (who, thank Og, is very little like Anaamika’s moms) was first diagnosed, she did not tell any more people about her cancer than she absolutely had to. A little denial I think, but more not wanting people to tip-toe around her and treat her like she was dead already. I totally saw her point of view, and in the same situation I might make the same decision.
Sorry for the hijack, Skald.
No need to apologize. My mother was the same way with her cancer.
Sometimes it really is for a guilt trip, and I think that’s what OtakuLoki was talking about. I’m not sure why she’s hiding it from me at the moment. I’m sure I’ll find out. At length. For a long time.
I am glad you have a good mom. Had? I don’t mean to be insensitive…I can’t tell from the post if she is around or not. Please forgive me.
Considering I don’t come from the Cleaver family, I’d say most of them.
Remaining sister–anyone else’s success/good fortune is seen as a threat. She will tear you down in public, all in “good fun.” She’s a bitch. She’s not in my life, but she’s at family dinners (mostly funerals now). Has still not forgiven me for giving birth first (she has no kids, so I suppose I should stop with the “first”)–the oldest “betrayal” of mine is in college.
MIL-I “stole” her lil boy. She does not recognize me as a person; she introduces me as “the mother of MY grandchildren.” I’m sort of waiting for her to die, to be brutally frank. I thought at one point her drinking would do it; then I thought for sure the cancer would carry her off, but she’s still going strong after 21 years. Too honest for you? Sorry. No tears from me at her funeral, after years of being told that it’s “shitty” that he married me etc.
Husband- has never stood up to mother. Does anything, and I mean anything, to appease his mother. This has helped the long demise of our marriage in untold ways. Thinks my sister (see above) is “just joking around” (with “jokes” such as “how can it be that your kids turned out halfway normal?” which can be funny when not said with venom). Essentially has no spine.
Mother–wouldn’t do me down, but wouldn’t extend a hand to help me, either. She wouldn’t want to cause a “scene”.
PS- I have confronted all these people at various points in my life, to no avail.
yes, holidays are just tons of fun around here…
Fredo, of course. He didn’t know what they would do with the information, and he’s safe so long as mom is alive.
I have no idea if she’s alive or dead. At this late date, dead is probably a good bet. The number of relatives still around who would still be able to give me any news of her has dwindled over the years to almost none now. The last time I had any contact with her was possibly before most Board members were born.
Watch out for the one who says “the check’s on me! I just finished a big deal and made 30 pieces of silver.”
These days, the friends are fine. But the only way family would sit down is in deposition. Of family, two of my sisters are most definately knife-wielding-back-seekers and their husbands are just thugs with sh-t-eating grins. They’re the kind of relatives whose number you pay Ma Bell to block. They’re like rat poison: At a good long distance, I suppose they have their uses. But they’re toxic to normal people.
I come from a large family that all talk behind each others backs. It is crazy. I try so hard not to participate, but get sucked in. Usually it is my mother who tells me what everyone has to say about me, knowing they wouldn’t like her to repeat it. UGH.
And, it is always the same sister, who is 5 years older than me that has the worst things to say about me. So I guess it would be her.
Mostly she just runs down my life choices, and my parenting. I don’t think that counts as betrayal actually…hmmm Maybe it is my mother who is betraying everyones confidences. I would think on this some more but after 43 years of it.
I am tired. :o
I’m not sure who would betray me. I’d probably kill them all just to be safe.