I have overheard more than one woman talking to another about why someone’s husband or SO left them for another woman and one of the reasons given is that the man was now getting oral sex and never did before, as if this was sufficient explanation in and of itself. Is oral sex really this powerful for some men that it will make them leave their non-oral sex giving wives and girlfriends?
It wouldn’t be for me. I woudn’t leave a relationship just because I wasn’t getting head.
When I originally opened this thread, I thought the OP was going to be about women using head to get their way; which I would enthusiatically say YES, getting head will make me change my mind on most things.
Not for me. To be perfectly blunt, oral sex never did it for me. It’s arousing, to be sure, but it’s never gotten the job done by itself. If I had it in my mind to leave someone, the promise of oral sex would not be enough to sway me.
Just one man’s opinion.
I would think that is an insufficient reason to leave someone and was probably either the women’s way of saying he’s a complete cad ( kind of like when someone says that “she must give good head” as the only reason a guy would even be with certain girls) or the lack of oral sex was a symptom of the sexual dysfunction in the marriage.
While it might be better to give than receive, I have to admit I am tired of a one way street. I would never leave my wife over it, but it does cause some stress that leads to the occasional fight.
Of course, it could just be that the man was tired of repeatedly hearing “I’m not doing that”. No one wants to feel like a pervert because there is more in life than the missionary position. It might be that he used oral in a parting shot as an example of why his “new” woman was more exciting. However, I think tanookie is right. You can be sure that the man found the other woman more exciting, and probably not just sexually
I think it’s just a rationalization to make the woman feel better. If he leaves you for something you don’t want to do, then you can focus on the defensible reasons for why you didn’t want to do it, thus proving that he’s obviously just selfish and perverted. If he leaves you because he doesn’t like you anymore or because you are a terrible lover, then it’s a lot more personally devastating.
Maybe not so much the sex act itself, but the other woman’s willingness or attitude or desire to do something for him that the wife won’t do could be a factor.
One certainly has to take into account the likelihood that the guy didn’t know the ‘other woman’ would go down on him before he cheated on his wife.
Isn’t that what the attraction was that caused Hugh Grant to go to a hooker, rather than go to bed with Elizabeth Hurley?
reminds me of a joke:
Little Suzy walked in on her parents one night while they were having sex. The next morning, Suzy’s mom talked to her about it and explained that that was where babies came from.
“Oh, I see.” said Suzy. “How about last week, when I saw you and Daddy on the couch and you were kissing his privates?”
“Well,” said Suzy’s mom, “that’s where jewelry comes from.”
Well, Elizabeth Hurley’s acting sucks, that’s for sure. But, by judging her near-anorexia, she apparently doesn’t swallow much of anything.
No man will change his mind about a woman over not giving oral… as long as the sex is good…
That’s completely false. We leave for the anal probes.
If a man is so shallow that oral sex is the clincher of a relationship, then perhaps… good riddance.
As a woman, never has (any type of) sex been used as a tool to shange my partner’s mind about something. IMHO, loving is meant for that, a demonstrative act of affection. Not a tool to be played with or taken lightly.
Interesting choice of words.
The pen(is) is mightier than the sword
but the same can not be said for all women…
there are plenty of women that are just as shalow as men can be… and only give oral to get things…
or if a guy doesn’t go down… they get rid of him…
Giving or recieving?
Since all I and most men think about most of the time is sex, I think giving a man head would be an effective tool to get whatever you want. It certainly would change my mind in most situations.
This also depends on the man’s status realative to the woman’s, and also the quality of the blowjob. If you are the type of guy that can pull alot of ass, then a blowjob wouldn’t change your mind on anything, or at least anything important, since you could easily get a blowjob from another woman. As far as quality, a girl that can’t do a good job won’t get what she wants from a man through oral sex.
My friends and I refer to the phenomenon of women that can give excellent blowjobs by saying that she gives “porno head.”
I believe that oral sex won’t change a man’s mind.
However, I’m willing to be proven wrong.
This is certainly true. I know too many women of this ilk. Reciprocity shouldn’t be a given or expected (again IMHO). Those women who use sex to gain favours or to change minds really need to grow up. They end up doing more damage to themselves psychologically than they realise.