Wishes for all Dopers

So I was browsing this Web site about beaches the other day, looking at all the beautiful photography, when I came across a JPEG image of a bottle. It was old, poorly-imaged, over-compressed, and tinted green, like verdigris.

So I picked up the bottle image, and decided to clean it up a bit. I loaded it into Photoshop, adjusted the tint, brightened the image, and started to polish it up a bit with an unsharp mask filter.

Lo and behold, out popped a hidden layer (yes, I know JPEGs don’t have layers – work with me here) containing–are you ready for this?–a genie.

“WFT? OMG! This is buckets of awesome!” Exclaimed the genie. “Thx, d00d. A wish for u!” (stupid digital genies). I told him that I had expected three wishes, and planned to use them on the Straight Dope.

“Altruistic, R U?” he snickered. “Ill tell u wat. Ill grant 1 wish to each Doper–even the n00bs, but they have to use it on other Dopers. U can make Lib a televangelist, turn lekatt into a skeptic (:D), or Giraffe back into a Pit mod, but u cant use it on urself.”

Wow. I am pondering this. It’s a hard decision. While I figure out what I’m doing, does anyone else want to jump in with your wish?

I feel nice this morning.

My wish is that everyone can undo one thread or post of their choosing that got them an undeserved or unwanted reputation. I was going to use an example, but that would be harmful to my proposed wish.

Probably a more serious reply than you intended… I’d wish this thread had never been necessary.

Good wishes, both of you, but his rule lets each of us make a wish about one single poster. I tried a little sneakiness:

Me: Okay, I wish I was Cecil Adams, the Smartest Man on Earth (even smarter than Ozymandias)

Genie: No, your wish has to be about another poster, not yourself.

Me: Okay, I wish Cecil Adams was me.

Genie::dubious: No.

Me: Hmmmmm.

Here’s one. I wish that gardentraveler will have a completely perfect garden for one whole year.

I’m not sure what the wish would be, but I’m pretty sure the beneficiary would be ** Ed Zotti **

I wish that NoClueBoy, whose last activity was 08-18-2008 07:11 PM and whose latest post was here would find his way to return to SDMB and raise some ungodly hell!

I’ve wondered what became of** NoClueBoy** too. He was funny.

I wish Vox could get his girl.
Treat her well bud

I wish for a summer of warm breezes and clear sailing for FairyChatMom and her SO.

Hmmm - I think I can find a way to use this to my advantage - I’ll wish that JustThinkin’ wins the lottery!

I wish Invisible Wombat was Cecil Adams.

snicker

I wish Cicero was, well, Cicero (alive, of course). And spoke modern English. How cool would that be?

I wish all of my fellow Dopers would enjoy the Dope as much as I do.

Wish you were here.

I wish slugs and amoebas and crawlies galore to olivesmarch4th.

I wish all the unemployed Dopers would get jobs that were perfect fits for them.

And AskNott, it’s really sweet of you to think of me. I was feeling guilty that I didn’t do anything in the garden today. But now I’m going to fold some lovely newspaper seed-starting pots and get a few seeds started off.

I wish you well.

I wish the Detroit Lions would win their first eight games so I could see the look on **Least Original Username Ever’s **face when they still didn’t make the playoffs.

I wish you happiness Quasi, with all my heart.