Just A Friend, Biz Markie
Don’t even look for it, don’t think about it. If you never listen to anyone else’s advice for the rest of your life, just don’t!
Oh, maybe because my name is Wendy…
And Windy has stormy eyes
That flash at the sound of lies
I’ve always hated that song.
Let’s see: annoying, silly, pretentious, gratingly sung, insanely repetitive…and yes, he DOES say “modren” for some reason…
What could it be besides Styx, “Mr Roboto”?
complete lyrics deleted - E.
It that the one that goes:
You, you got what I need
But you say he’s just a friend, you say he’s just a friend.
Or something like that? If so, the song almost seems intended as a joke. I smiled the first time, but the smile quickly disappears.
Welcome to the SDMB, maddiesilver. You might want to read the sticky threads at the top of each forum. For example, the following is from the Café Society sticky.
Two moderator notes
1 : maddiesilver, please do not reprint the entire lyrics of a song. It is a copyright violation which is against our rules.
2 : Jeff Olsen, I’ll do the moderating here, thank you.
How could I forget Under Heavy Manners by Robert Fripp/David Byrne:
www.urizel.com/manners.html+solipsism+%22robert+fripp%22&hl=en&ie=UTF-8]Urggghhhhhhh.
I think Mr. Roboto is quite amusing (if not intentionally so) and thus not at all deserving of inclusion.
I think the most painful thing I’ve had to listen to is Neil Diamond’s version of Red, Red Wine
Now, Euty, no need to be like that. I am a Moderator-in-Waiting, you know. I even have a Staff mug. 
If Video Game music counts…
Sonic adventure 2’s collecting stages are the worst examples of ©rap that I’ve heard.
You just can’t ©rap about a bipedal echidna with brass knuckles and an attidude problem running around getting shards of a big-ass emerald that he broke to get it away from a guy who can’t even USE the damnned thing.
My former vote:
XANADUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!
XANADUUUU!
Olivia Newton-John is responsible for a number of lyrical crimes, but this is the top of the list.
My new vote: Never Been to Me
Thanks (?) to this thread, I have heard it for the first time, and I have to say that it has my vote for worst pop song ever released nationally. Things like Afternoon Delight can be excused as hippie idiocy, but there is no excuse for Never. And of course, there is always Muskrat Love.
BTW, I remember the Bob Carlisle song other than Butterfly Kisses that was mentioned earlier, and here you go:
Just awful, and it will indeed drop a diabetic at 50 yards.
No, no, no people! I’ve got it!
"Tears Are Not Enough" by Northern Lights, aka "Dozens of Canadian Artists Attempt Mass Career Suicide–Several Were Successful"
Geddy Lee, whyyyyyyyy???
I’m just glad The Tragically Hip weren’t around in 1985 to participate in this copy-cat, ethiopia-helping, circle jerk.
When I was in college I worked at my hometown radio station for a couple of years (KLBA, Albia Iowa 1370 AM. Check it out if you’re driving by. It’s still not very good). I used to get constant requests for this flegm called Nobody by someone who just went by Sylvia. I hated that record.
For the longest time, I thought she was complaining about never having been to Maine. 
I just want to note that if the lyrics for Christmas Shoes posted above are indeed genuine it can not be topped lyrically for the worst song ever. I have a book I treasure devoted to bad poetry and it is reminiscent of bad Victorian sentimental poetry. “If Momma meets Jesus tonight.”, this can’t really be serious.
I’ve been lucky in life; I’ve never heard “Never Been to Me,” except that it was a throwaway line when MST3K roasted one of the Hercules movies. There’s something wonderfully ludricrious about hearing that phrase when Herc was flexing his glistening pecs that it had me laughing.
Let’s see . . . bad songs . . . someone already mentioned “I am I said” with the immortal line about no one there to listen to the singer bitching “Not even the chair.” (Dave Barry added the chair responding, “Whoa, I been there!”)
My favorite is Barry Manilow’s “Copacabana,” for setting the tragic story of Lola the showgirl and her boyfriend Tony to a bright bouncy pseudo-Latin beat. Yes, come down to the Copa, kids, where you can sing and dance, watch Tony bite the big one and see Lola “lost her youth / she lost her Tony / now she LOST / HER / MIND”
At the Copa (Copa) Copacabana! The hottest spot north of–
SLAP!
. . . Thanks. I . . . needed that.
Where, oh where can my baby be?
The Lord took her away from me.
She’s gone to heaven, so I got to be good,
so I can see my baby when I leave-a this world
Ah,. but what of us that have worked in recording 
I forget the bands name but they sounded like Heart. She sang like Heart, she owned everything they ever did, admitted to being their bigest fan.
The song I recorded for them (but refused to produce) was called “Mystic Man”.
Terrible.
I can’t reveal how I know this, but Barry himself detests the song. It was supposed to be a light throwaway track to fill space on the album, and suddenly he found himself being forced to sing it everywhere for twenty-some years. Ya almost feel sorry for the guy. OTOH, it made him a buttload of money, so I suppose there were consolations.
This thread is hilarious. Why all the hatred for “Wake Me Up Before You Go Go”? That song was brilliant! Or not, but God, that video! The feathered hair! The shorts! I loved it. Anyway…
“I’ll Never Get Over You (Getting Over Me)”!!!
I hate that damn song. I was eating in Carl’s Jr. the other day when that filth came blaring through the speakers, rendering me too damn annoyed to eat my cheeseburger in peace. Well it wasn’t blaring, but horrible songs always seem at least 20 million decibals louder than they are. Oh, and I ate my cheeseburger just fine too, but still. That song’s so awful. That cheesy chorus makes me want to stab myself, whoever wrote that song and those bastards who sing it. Seriously, “I’ll never get over you getting over me”? The heck? Who told them that line was clever and/or touching? Worst song ever recorded in the history of the world. Or at least the most annoying. Sorry for all the babbling, but no song has ever annoyed me as much as that one.