I have to say that, as a name, it doesn’t exactly roll off the tongue.
I’m another “Nice Guy” (see, I have a certificate from my spouse to prove it); my pre-marriage dating life was not exactly robust but at least I never got the “let’s be friends” speech. I did once think about starting an organization called FONG (the Fraternal Order of Nice Guys) as a help to all those self-proclaimed “nice guys” and all those women who claim to be looking for one, but decided the potential for severe emotional trauma and subsequent legal action was too great. Y’all will just have to find each other the usual way.
No prob, I figured it out. But my quotes around the word “nice guy,” stating “guys that proclaim themselves nice guys” and my referencing the quote to the “Nice Guy” website made it pretty clear that it was a specific type of “nice guy” that I was targeting in my comments.
OK first off dude (the op) you need to realize that there are TWO sides to every story; When a woman sits there and tells you “OH! My boyfriend is such an ass he hit me” “or he threw me on the ground” She’s not tewlliung you what the fuck it is that SHE was doing to provoke the situation.
Case in point:
Once me and my ex-wife were having an arguement once; at the climax of the arguement I told her I was gonna step out for a minute to cool of. Now at the time all I had on was my underwear. AS I was trying to put my jeans on she kept pulling them from me so I couldn’t get dressed and go outside becuase SHE demanded that I stay right there and talk to her now. (and just in case you didn’t know NOBODY has the right to keep you against your will, married or not) Well anyway push came to shove and I wound up forcibly taking her by the arms and I threw her outside of our bedroom and locked the door so I could finished getting dressed. Then I left.
Well guess what happened after I left? The cops were called and they were gonna take me to jail over this shit. When all the time, the whole reason for me wanting to leave was to avoid EXACTLY what happened. But no the cops don’t see it that way becuase like you they trhink that women are ALWAYS the victims.
I sorry but sometimes a good smack is just what the doctor ordered. Abuse works BOTH ways folks.
Not true in my state. Not sure what the laws are in other states.
Assault is assault here. If you file a restraining order against a female for assaulting you, it’s upheld. The person filing the restraining order is the one that the courts are behind, unless the person being accused can prove that the charges are untrue.
Yup, I know. Really weird law huh? But see, if someone files a restraining order against you. You aren’t being officially charged with a crime. That’s “their” (the Alaska Court System’s) statement on it.
For instance, two people are living together, one goes to the court and has a restraining order filed on the other, they can ask for the other partner to be kicked out and for them to pay X amount of support etc, and the person being accused has to prove that the RO is not true.
And this is independent of gender. If a man files against a woman. The RO would be upheld (if and until disproved) the same as if it were the other way around.
on paper that sounds good but realistically i dont think its how things work.
besides that is for a RO, which is different than an arrest for assault. perhaps a man can get a restraining order but an arrest for assault by a female SO is a different matter. Too many cops want to be john wayne so you’re pretty much screwed if you’re a man in that type of situation.
Yeah, it’s pretty unfortunate that a lot of people, cops and domestic violence support systems included, do not believe that it is possible for a man to be assaulted or abused by a female SO.
Yes. That is exactly how it works in our state. This is information imparted to me, by the court system when I was involved in helping a friend that had been falsely accused.
I spent a lot of time on the phone having it lined out for me by several different court employees (I didn’t believe the ones that told me this either). And by my friend’s (who WAS in this situation) lawyer.
The word from the court, and the lawyer is that it doesn’t matter who files the paperwork, it is whoever gets it filed first. Then, it is up to the recipient to refute the claim.
I used to be a nice guy, but it just wasn’t profitable. :dubious:
Seriously though, I think what is happening is that the majority of us are nice guys, but since women tend to be drawn to losers - they get passed around, so to speak. There aren’t many of them out there, but every woman has dated one of them.
bolding mine
??? “Women tend to be drawn to losers”? That’s a pretty big brush.
If you define “loser” as the arrogant. assholish, possibly abusive (or cheater, etc) guy that seems to be able to “get” lots of girls.
Again, if you (collective you) are in a place designed for men and women to meet, which type of guy do you think is going to “get the girl”? The one sitting in the corner “HOPING and WISHING” they’d talk to him???
Or the guy out there actively asking girls out and interracting with them? It’s not that “women are drawn to losers”. It’s frequently that the men who are the ones doing the asking out, and being interested in women are the ones who get them.
Again, it’s not as if the “jerks” have their loserishness (not a real word) tattooed on their foreheads. Women are drawn to the men that are interested in them. Unfortunately, many times, the outgoing men DO turn out to be the jerks. How on earth are women supposed to know that the guy over in the corner is wanting to talk to them, or even to dance with them?
This is not however, equivalent to “women being drawn to losers”. Good grief! You think women walk into a club and go “hmmm, who can make my life suck the most”? And then go make a move on that one? NOT.
One other thing, women aren’t the only ones to frequently end up with “losers” this is true on the “flip side” also. There are plenty of “nice guys” who keep going for the gorgeous, but selfish, cold-hearted, gold-digging “pwincesses”.
I wouldn’t date an asshole. I’d only date a nice guy.
Just a shame I shop at Lane Bryant, I guess. I’m not unattractive, though I am overweight. I’m confident and charming (so I’m told :D) and fairly cheerful. I don’t play evil woman games – I say what I mean, I don’t play the you-should-have-read-my-mind game…
But guys don’t give me a second look. Even nice guys.
Just as there are plenty of nice guys out there perfectly willing to date a nice girl, there’s a few decent women, keeping mostly to themselves, who quietly recognize sweet guys and watch as they endlessly throw themselves at pretty little morons, while the pretty little morons throw themselves at assholes.
No prob, I figured it out. But my quotes around the word “nice guy,” stating “guys that proclaim themselves nice guys” and my referencing the quote to the “Nice Guy” website made it pretty clear that it was a specific type of “nice guy” that I was targeting in my comments.