I’m 30. I’ve been separated from my wife for three months, and the divorce will be final in a few weeks.
I have a demanding job, and I just started grad school part time. School is kicking my ass - they do a trial by fire for the first quarter, and I have about 20 hours of combined homework per week. In fact, I should really be doing homework right now.
I’m not really looking for a girlfriend right now, for obvious reasons. Still, I’d like the occasional female companionship, if they’re smart and funny.
I’ve been on a handful of dates and had a handful of drunken and not-so-drunken make-out sessions with a few women since the split. None of them have really worked out, but they’ve all ended amicably.
Hell, I’m even pretty good friends with one of them now, to the extent that she’s constantly trying to pimp me out to her friends.
Anyway, I’m now facing a bit of a dilemma.
a) Tonight, I’m having a couple of drinks with a cute 21-year-old who is WAY too smart and mature for her age.
b) Tomorrow night, I’m having a couple of drinks with a cute grad student, who is my neighbor, who is every nerd’s wet dream (she’s really in to Sci Fi.)
From my post-first-date impressions, both A and B have different types of potential. A for a medium term fling, and B for a medium-to-long term actual relationship.
Problem is, I don’t want a medium term relationship right now. Hell, I’m still technically married, and I’m just now getting used to living on my own again.
And the pisser is, I’m not the one who initiated contact with either of them. Both of them are aware of my marital situation, and though neither of them are aware of each other specifically, I’ve been very clear that at this stage, I’m not looking for exclusivity.
If it were six months from now, I’d let A down gently and continue on with B. If B weren’t around, I’d continue seeing A, with the understanding on both of our parts that the long term probably wouldn’t work out.
So what do I do here?
I want to do the right thing, but I’m not sure what the right thing is.