While I am not a mother, i can tell you now that formula is spendy and a 13 ounce can will yield 26 ounces of formula. Nestle Good Start is more than three dollars a can, and even cheap Walmart diapers run five dollars a pack. Jars of baby food start at 35- 40 cents for 4 ounces. I am surprised at how many
jars of baby food and diapers Maddy goes through in a week. At 10 months, she also drinks a can of formula daily.
I know my niece has a more expensive crib, at $250, but it can be converted into a full size bed. A package of baby socks is 7 dollars. Cute outfits invariably have spit up on them 20 minutes after they are worn. Get lots of onesies, and gowns with the elastic in the hem as they are quickest thing to put on in a hurry.
Clothing for newborn babies while cute, is outgrown within weeks.
Florida is not among the most expensive places to live, and Daycare here runs at least $100-120 dollars week.
Many people have already posted how expensive daycare is. You might be thinking they are exaggerating. They’re not. As I stated in another thread, I own a daycare facility. Mine is located in a small town with some pretty stiff competition. Even taking into consideration my prices have to be reasonable in order to have any clients, you would still be paying $500 a month (remember this is in a very small town) until the child is 18 months old. That amounts to $9,000 and does not include what you would spend on diapers and formula. I have some families with both parents employed and one of them working just to pay for daycare.
If you live in a city you would be paying a lot more than that. I know of a daycare in a nearby city that charges $900 a month to take care of an infant.
At this point you might be asking yourself why daycares charge such exhorbitant prices to take care of infants. They have to. If they don’t, they lose money. Let me explain (based on the rules and regulations of the state of Texas). It boils down to child/staff ratio. One caregiver can only take care of four infants. If a daycare charges only $100 a week for each infant every cent would go to the caregiver’s salary, paying for yearly training and supplies for the infant room. The center doesn’t make any money. They may be there to take care of your children but they are also there to make a profit. It’s a business, not a charity.
If you had state assistance the amount you pay for childcare every week could be reduced up to half of what you would pay otherwise. If you still want to work but can’t afford childcare on your own this is the best way to go. There are several charitable organizations out there that assist with childcare costs. The first one that comes to my mind is Neighborhood Centers, Inc.. I don’t know if they are located in your state as well (since I don’t know your location) but I’m sure with a little research you could find out.
You’ve been given some great advice by many people. Perhaps you should think about what they have said.
After reading Anya Marie’s post I thought of more I wanted to add. I really shouldn’t post when I’m more asleep than awake.
In a daycare setting, not only do you have to pay the weekly fees (some insist you pay in advance) you are also required to provide everything your infant needs: diapers, formula, wipes, clothing, bibs, burp towels and in many instances toys. Once your child is eating baby food you provide that as well. When your child is introduced to table food and if you have a special diet for him/her many facilities insist you provide the food.
After your child is 18 months old the rules change. The weekly fee might be a little less but I know of many facilities that charge for educational tools; crayons, glue, etc. The facility will furnish it but you pay a fee for it. My facility doesn’t charge such a fee but I know of many in my town that do.
After you’ve taken price into consideration then you must hunt for a daycare that will provide good (or excellent, depending on which you want) care for your child. Personally, I would want excellent care. That costs more.
Not only that but you must find a facility that has an open spot for your child. This goes back to child/staff ratio and the allowed number of children in total for which the facility is licensed. Your best bet is to start looking early on in your pregnancy. I’ve had clients come to me in the first month of pregnancy to be placed on my waiting list.
If you decide to place your child in a facility then let me give you some advice. Visit them often and unannounced. Nothing like catching a daycare off-guard to see how they do things. Observe how the caregivers interact with the children. Talk to the caregivers. Talk to the director. Find out what hours and for how long the director is on site. In Texas a director only has to be on site a certain number of hours in a day. Find out who is in charge when the director is gone and talk to the person. Ask questions. Research the facilities. Get in touch with your state’s Department of Protective and Regulatory Services. Speak with that facility’s licensing rep. They can give you information you would otherwise never know.
I can never stress the above enough. I encourage my clients to keep tabs on my facility. Above all, remember this is your child and unless you know the caregivers you are leaving him/her with a stranger.
IDBB, why can’t you aweknowledge your problems as solvable thing if you actually try and not some sort of unmovable object(your attitude towards advice seems quite the same: unmovable)?
LISTEN TO THE DAMN ADVICE. Stop wailing and wailing against everybody, especially with your hatred against minorities. Placing your hate towards them won’t do anything, except get you known as a hateful person who shifts blame to others. Oh, seems you’ve already done that. Work towards your goals, it’s a lot better than pretending they’ll go away if you whine harder.
There were actually two different anonymous posters. I was the first one. I thought that my advice was helpful. She had not gotten any response to her more recent posts and I didn’t realize that so many Straight Dope people still look at her journal. I don’t have a Live Journal account so my post was anonymous. She has turned off her anonymous posting now so I can’t post a follow up. I will include my name from now on if I post in a Live Journal. I honestly didn’t even think about it.
I have no idea who the second anonymous poster was. I would never be that harsh to a pregnant women who is so clearly mentally unstable. I really do worry about her and the baby.
I really wish that IDBB would consider the child’s best interests and put it up for adoption. She is not mature enough to care for herself, let alone take responsibility for an infant. I have a horrible suspicion that in 6 months to a year she’ll be posting about the unfairness of CPS taking away the child and, after all, she only smacked him to make him be quiet.
I know pregnancy makes us slightly crazy (well, it did me) but it shouldn’t make you so completely fuck up reading comprehension. I am now the third or fourth poster who has expressed that there is no “it’s my DUTY as a woman to stay home and be a mom” in what the anonymous poster(s) said.
I for one am flabbergasted that a woman is even allowed to return to work 1 week after a baby’s birth. Maybe I’m naive–do people do this? Do employers let them?. It’s pretty bad fucking policy, and I consider it a public health issue–a baby NEEDS to be with its mom after its birth. I mean, I don’t think a mom who ADOPTS should have to return to work in one week’s time, so I’m not even talking about the issues with hormones, bleeding, stitches, lack of sleep, and other parts of a mother’s recovery.
I’m not sure who I am directing this to–Maven, her employer, the law… but I just cannot fathom a plan to go back to work. It’s not a good idea for the mom, for the baby, or for society.
If you end up with a c-section, you’re really fucked, BTW. I don’t know how else to put it.
You have to be in REALLY GOOD SHAPE to go back to work a couple weeks after giving birth. Quit being unrealistic.
You can’t afford daycare if you’re working a fast-food job. Use your head for something besides a hat rack. A course in third grade math is in order here.
Pride. Feh. Proud of what? The fact that you would take a shitty job over raising your kid with needed assistance? That’s not pride…that’s stupidity.
As the mother of an 18 month old, let me give you a basic monthly rundown on his expenses:
Daycare: $700 a month
Diapers: $40 amonth
Formula (back when he was still on it) $80 a month
Baby food (back when he was still on it) $20 a month
Doctor’s visits/checkups copay: $15 per visit
This doesn’t consider clothing or his nursery or medicine when he was sick, etc.
And you’re worried about cable?
(Why is it this poster starts these threads then never returns to respond or defend her statments and eventually it turns into a pile on until a mod comes by and closes it???)
While I am sure anything is possible, is it generally a given that a mom will work up until the due date? I would assume that women that can do this usually have sit down type jobs. I can’t imagine what it would be like to be at a job where you have to stand (and hussle during the lunch crowd) the week prior to giving birth.
Aries28
you forgot to add health insurance to your total.
If she is being covered by her husband’s insurance and plans to add the baby, you can easily add $300 - $400 per month for coverage.
I also have some ernest questions for the OP:
Are you currently seeing a doctor? Are you seeking prenatal care? Are you covered under your husband’s insurance in regards to the hospital visit?
I realized I didn’t clarify myself with the insurance quote:
If she AND the baby are being added to the insurance, expect a monthly payment of $300-$400.
I am not sure how much it is if only the baby is being added to the policy.
Cranky said, “I’m not sure who I am directing this to–Maven, her employer, the law… but I just cannot fathom a plan to go back to work. It’s not a good idea for the mom, for the baby, or for society.”
My understanding is that employers MUST give you six weeks (without pay). That’s how it was for me, anyway.
She won’t be able to bond properly with the baby if she goes back to work in one week.
I don’t have any kids, but I was around when my sister in law had my nephew. It consumed her, entirely. Hell, it consumed all of us. The thought of her going back to work in a week is laughable. She could barely move a week after my nephew was born.
You’ve got no idea how much your world is going to change.
Take the damn help. There’s no shame in it. Your child’s well being and happiness are more important than your misplaced pride.
It depends. I’ve known people who did work up to the birth date, but they generally had the baby a week or so early, and had actually planned to take the last week off. A sit-down type job helps a lot, too. But some people do it, though in a stand-up service job, it would be a bad idea.
I don’t think I could have done it. I could barely walk the last couple of weeks, the first time. (The second time, I had a planned c-section 10 days early.) I spent as much time as possible in swimming pools. But I was pretty enormous. Some people have teeny babies and manage easier.
After the first kid was born, I couldn’t do much for about 3-4 weeks, could only lift the baby (nothing heavier) for 6 weeks. No driving for a couple of weeks. No vacuuming or similar for 6. That’s absolutely normal for a c-section after labor.
